Just Hold On-A Louis Tomlinson Ageplay Story

Chapter 6

Louis' POV

Saturday is a crazy blur of activity all day, and I am a nervous wreck. I do my best to hide it, but I don't think I do a very good job.

I wake up still cuddled into Danielle and get up, trying not to wake her up, so that I can deal with my sheets from last night. I still can't believe I did that. I get ready,  just making myself some toast for breakfast, not feeling too hungry given my nervousness for tonight. As I am eating, Danielle comes in.

"Mornin' babe. How are you feeling?" Her voice is perky. Too perky for the morning, if you ask me.

How am I supposed to answer? How honest am I going to be? How much does she know already? Will she notice if I lie? I don't want her to know how stressed I am, but I can't sound too happy because she knows that I am at least somewhat stressed.

"M'alright I guess. Pretty nervous for tonight" That's safe right?

"You're going to do great!" Well, at least I've got one person who will still be my fan after tonight. I'm not much reassured though, and just hum non-committally in response, continuing to nibble my toast.

After breakfast, I run by my family's house to check on them before heading off to rehearse with Steve.

Throughout rehearsals, I am quite nervous, and it's really getting to me. My voice is unsteady, my stomach unsettled, and a couple of times, I almost burst into tears after I mess up. I hate how much the nerves are affecting me. This isn't normal for me.

Steve is really understanding. He doesn't pressure me or get upset when I mess up. He keeps suggesting that we take a break, but I don't want to yet. I need to get this right. I'm not doing this for me anymore, it's for my mum, because it's what she wanted me to do.

We run through a bit of choreography, nothing too complex because I'm not much into dancing, just enough so my movement onstage is coordinated. It's when we try to put everything together that it all goes wrong. My voice cracks a little as I'm singing, which normally would be slightly embarrassing, but not a big deal. Today it just pushes me over the edge as I get flustered and forget the lyrics to the next verse completely. Frustrated, I throw my water bottle to the ground. I'm so caught up in my frustration that I don't notice the music stopping and Steve coming over to me until he puts a hand on my shoulder.

"Louis, mate, I think it's time for a break yeah?" This time I give in, nodding slightly, not trusting myself to speak. He goes on: "Hey. I know you're nervous, but you're going to do great."

I shake my head in protest "No. I keep messing up. I can't even remember the words to my own song! Nobody's gonna like it if I can't even sing it right!" My voice wavers; I'm on the edge of tears. I'm terrified. I don't know if I can do this. But I have to. I promised mum...I can't break that promise. I'm doing this for her now. Mum...I miss her so much.

"You're just nervous mate. Let's take a break, grab something to eat, and just run through the lyrics a couple times before we try this again." I just nod. I want to cry, but I'm not going to embarrass myself by crying in front of Steve. I admire him too much to show that much emotion in front of him. Besides, he's not nervous at all, so I would feel utterly ridiculous admitting that I'm this worked up from nerves when I've performed hundreds of times before.

I'm not hungry, my stomach unsettled from nerves, but I force myself to eat a bit of lunch. When we get back up to rehearse again, I find myself regretting my decision. The slightly unsettled nervous feeling in my stomach has turned into an angry, upset feeling. Nevertheless, I get up there to keep practicing. Halfway through the song, however, I notice an all too familiar sensation in my stomach and rush off towards the nearest bin, gagging and retching as my small lunch reappears in the bin. I remain hunched over, breathing deeply, as I fight the tears threatening to spill down my cheeks. For the second time today, Steve puts his hand on my back, comforting me.

"You're okay Louis. You can do this. The fans will love it. Remember 'If it all goes wrong, just hold on'" I smile a bit when he quotes our song. His words are calming, but I still find myself wanting to cry. Screw it...I've embarrassed myself enough now, a little more won't matter.

"I'm just really nervous. I know it doesn't make sense...I don't know if I can do this. But I know I have to." I don't want to go back to rehearsing. For some reason, I just want to stay here, with Steve's arm around me. But we need to keep practicing.

"You have every right to be nervous. I'm sure it's a big change from performing with the other guys. But you are going to be great," Steve says as he rubs my back a little. "Why don't you go to the loo and clean up a bit, compose yourself, then we can try this again." I nod, grateful for how understanding Steve is being, and stand up.

"Thanks Steve. Couldn't do this without you"

In the loo, I rinse my mouth and splash my face before checking my phone. Liam has texted, asking how I'm feeling about tonight. I click on it and reply:

"Nervous...just puked" I know I don't have to hide anything from Liam, and to be honest, I kinda want reassurance from him. I'm not normally this needy, but I guess things are just getting to me.

His response is immediate. "Aw Lou...You're gonna do great! Wasn't going to tell you, but I'm gonna be backstage tonight!"

I can hear Steve calling me, so I send a quick "Thx" before heading back to rehearse.

The rest of rehearsal goes well and I manage to keep my nerves under control for the most part, until I am actually excited to perform.    

Wow...longest chapter yet.

I need input. I want Liam/another boy to sing a 1D song to Louis in a future chapter when he is upset. Which song should I use?

Also, side note, there will be no boyxboy relationships in this book, everything between the boys will be purely friendship. Not that I'm not a shipper, just it doesn't work with my plot.