Internal cry

I need you to count with me.

Chapter 5

Ella's P.O.V:

My car sped across the last red light before my sister's school and I griamced and hoped there wasn't a camera. Her school came into view and my tires screeched when I turned onto the parking lot. I parked the car close to the entrance and jumped out. I didn't bother to lock the car. I ran towards the gate and the security guard opened it for me. I thanked him and didn't waste any time. I ran through the hallways dodging middle school kids on their way to class.

The principal's office came into view and I stopped remembering my manners. I stopped and was about to knock when the door was wrenched open and the principle stood before me.

She was forty years old and her blond hair was starting to grey. Her brown eyes blazed with intelligent and her eyebrows would rise every now and then. She was very good at reading body language and her students didn't usually lie to her.

I wasn't one of her students.

Next to her was the school psychologist. He was a plumb little man with brown hair and an open and friendly face. I've seen him before, but was still shocked that he was there.

I turned towards the principle and she took a deep breath. She smiled kindly at me and I tried to smile back, but my smile faltered.

"Harmony is hiding in the closet in a side hallway. She is crying a lot. We do not know what to do and was made aware that she would most likely contact you," she told me and I nodded. I didn't ask about the psychologist even though I was curious and walked with the principle's guidance towards the closet.

As I approached the closet I could hear Mony's hysterical labored crying from within it. She was crying in complete despair. Her breathing was labored and I got scared, but forced my voice to stay calm. I bent down next to the door and tried to calm her down.

"Mony? Mony, it's Ella. I need you to open the door, sweetie," I told her quietly and heard her give a soft whimper.

"Ella! Ella! Something is wrong. I'm... I'm... dying, Ella," she cried in terror and I felt my heart stop. I had to force myself to remember that this was normal. She was having a panic attack, that's all. No matter how many times I repeated it to myself I still felt my heart miss a beat whenever she held her breath.

"Sweetie, it's alright. I'm here now but I need you to open the door," I told her calmly and tried to follow my own advice and calm my beating heart.

"Ella! I'm dying! I can't bre...breath," she stutters and lets out a loud cry. My heart was breaking when I spoke again.

"Mony? Sweetie? I have an idea. Do you want to hear it?" I asked her trying to distract her. She whimpers a yes and I continue.

"Do you remember what doctor Evelyn told you?" I questioned. She sniveled an agreement and I smiled slightly.

"I need you to count with me, alright?" I asked her. She didn't say anything so I started counting backwards from a hundred.

"One hundred, ninety-nine, ninety-eight, ninety seven." After a while she joined me and we counted. When we reached the mid-forties her breathing has started to become more even and her crying was dying down.

When we reach zero her crying had completely died down with an occasional snivel and her breathing was calm. I breathed a sigh of relief and my heart calmed down.

"Mony? Can you open the door now?" I ask her carefully and I hear a shuffling of feat and the click of a lock. Then the door opened and I stood up. The small figure of my sister stood in the doorway. She looked completely broken. Her dark hair blocked her face, but I could see her face was tear stroked and her eyes were swollen. I wrapped her in a hug and felt her tiny arms snake around my waist. I squeezed her tightly towards me and felt her sob again.

"Shhh," I comforted her and stroked her hair. I comforted her for what felt like ages but was more likely a matter of minutes. When her sobs died down I felt her go slack against me and my heart melted. I picked up her slacken form and held her closely against my chest and her eyes closed with fatigue.

The psychologist motioned for me to follow and I carried my sister's sleeping form towards a room with two single beds and a door that led towards a bathroom. I put her on the bed and explained to the psychologist that I needed to get back to school. He nodded and spoke quickly.

"This isn't the first time this has happened am I right?" he asked. I was very uncomfortable talking to him. I had too many secrets I didn't need him to know.

"No, it's not, sir," I agreed. He nodded.

"I'm afraid she might be suffering from an anxiety disorder... How is her life at home since that could have an influence on her mental state?" he asked and I tensed up. I glanced back at my sister and smiled.

"I'm sorry but I don't have anything to tell you, sir. She had a panic attack, but she will be alright now," I told him and walked out. I hated leaving her like that but knew I had to get back to class. I got in my car with the psychologist still yelling questions at me and rode back to school. It was about time for lunch now and I was glad. That meant I could sneak back in without too much attention. I stopped just as the bell went for Second Lunch and grabbed my book bag. I locked my car and snuck back inside.

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