17 year old Raegan Scott is trying to make her way out the hood the best way she can. The only thing is no one told her that it wouldn't be as easy as planned. While dealing with her head strong over protective older brother Raegan wants nothing mor...
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Sitting in my car in front of the cemetery I tried to find the courage to get out. Everything that took place with Ryan had a nigga mind fucked up. Knowing I shouldn't have took what Rae said to heart last night I did and it had me over thinking everything. Maybe this shit was my fault.
Finally stepping out the car I wiped my sweaty hands down my jeans before walking through the grass toward Ericka's tombstone. When I got there I just looked at it. I'd spent all this money making sure she had the best yet this was my first time seeing it in person.
Kneeling down in front of it I rested my hand over the top of it before bowing my head.
"I know it's nearin' da end of da world if my black ass made my way hea' after all dis time." I said letting out a nervous chuckle.
"I would say I'm changed and got my head on straight outchea but you know me too well ta' even lie to you like dat. I'm still head first in dese streets but you know imma natural born hustla' I don't know how ta' do shit else but hustle." I said shrugging as I ran my free hand down my face.
"I ain't come hea' to talk about how I make my livin' tho'. I jus' came hea' ta' get a piece of mind. You was always dat voice of reason fa' me when I felt like the world was on my shoulda's. I did some foul shit E and now I feel like God payin' me back for all my wrongs. Ryan got lit up da' otha' night but my boy made it. I ain't cried dat hard since da' last time I held you in my hands sis." I said feeling the tears trying to break through.
"They sayin' he good tho but I jus' I can't go up dea' and see him like dat. Feel like all dis shit fallin' on me. Tired of da' people around me takin' L's on my behalf. I know people gone say dat shit wasn't my fault but to me it was. Ryan my brotha' regardless of what we had goin' on I was suppose ta' be right thea' wit him. Hell I was suppose to take dem bullets cuz I know he'd take mine no question. He wasn't even suppose to be around dem niggas E. He felt like his niggas wasn't down fa' him so he moved around and they caught him slippin' and we let dem." Lifting my glasses I used my shirt to while my eyes.
"Anyway I love you E man and I swear ta' God if I could cry a river fa' you ta' swim back I'd cry my damn eyes out. I miss you like crazy E baybeh. Jus watch ova yo la' brotha' outchea' man. You know I'm reckless. I was born ruthless but when they took my baybeh sista' I turned into a savage."
After I finished talking I kissed my two fingers and pressed them against her tombstone. Standing up I dusted my pants off before walking back to my car while adjusting my sun glasses on my face.
