Study Break // Luke Hemmings

❀ sixteen ❀

Lilly's POV

The door swung open, meaning Luke was home. He seemed so anxious to get home in the mornings when he hadn't even left, but today was Friday. To him it would be freedom for three days. For me, it would be one hell of a weekend. Tomorrow was Francesca and Michael's funeral, I thought it was sweet how they were having a conjoined one. After all, they were in love.

I greeted Luke, and was greeted back with his arms snaking around my waist.

"You don't know how bad I want you." He mumbled against my neck. His words had a certain affect on me that made me squirm in his grip as he lifted the hem of the t-shirt I was wearing, which was his.

"I also forgot to tell you how damn hot you look in my clothes." I laughed at his comment and tried to pry his arms off me before things got too far, but stopped. If I knew anything, I knew that I loved Luke.

"Luke?"

"Hmm?"

"I.. I'm ready." I told him as I got up off the bed and began to straddle him. His eyes grew wide as he kept his hands on my waist, and I leaned down to kiss him. I ran one of my hands through his hair as I left a hungry kiss on his lips, then kissing his neck. Luke softly moaned, but then pulled me off of him.

"What?" I questioned, so confused. Isn't this what he wanted?

"Lilly.." He started, trying to catch his breath. "You aren't ready. I don't want your first time to be rushed, I could tell you were nervous, and I felt you try to squirm out of my grip."

I sighed and fixed his hair, then opened my mouth to speak.

"I've already had my first time." I said and held my breath, hoping he wouldn't lash out on me.

"Who was your first?" He surprisingly asked me, calmly.

"Michael." He nodded understandingly and kissed my forehead.

"You're not mad?" I asked him.

"Why would I be mad? I can't do anything to fix it. Jealous, yes. Mad, no." He laughed as I lifted up my head to peck his chin, not being tall enough to reach his cheek.

"Tomorrow is the funeral." I softly said, my face pressed against his chest. He was drawing circles onto my hip

"I heard about it at school on Monday.." He trailed off. I didn't want to continue talking about the subject, so I dropped it. 

"Hey, you know what I just realized?" 

"What?" Luke said, staring down at me.

"You never got to tutor me."

* * * 

Day of the Funeral


I could barely pull my body out of Luke's warm bed, but I knew I had to. Today was the day I had been dreading for for over a week, I felt sad again. I felt emotionally trained, too, and the funeral hadn't even started. I put one foot on the ground and shivered at how cold it was. I prayed to god it didn't rain, because that would just make me even more emotional. I shook Luke's body, earning a load groan from him as he shifted his body over to face the wall. 

"Luke, wake up." I said to him as I tapped his arm. He didn't reply, and I was in no mood to constantly bother him. I sighed and walked to the bathroom, starting the water for the shower. 

I stepped inside and felt the heat of the steaming water on my back. I relaxed and felt my nerves loosen a little. When I picked up the shampoo bottle, I heard the door to the bathroom open. I instantly covered my naked body and looked through the glass door, hoping it wasn't Liz. That would be so embarrassing. Instead, I found a man of about twenty standing in front of the bathroom sink. I let out a subconscious scream and he turned in shock.

"Oh my god!" He yelled. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I didn't know Luke's girlfriend was here, oh my god." He said as he covered his eyes, backing out of the bathroom. I decided to cut my shower short and grabbed my towel from the rack, still a bit freaked out over the situation with that man who I didn't know was even here. 

Once I was ready, I walked towards Luke's room, but heard him talking to someone, so I stopped and eavesdropped. 

"And when I walked in, she was in the shower, and she screamed. I didn't even know she was there, I panicked." The man said. 

"There's really nothing you could do, I mean, you couldn't introduce yourself while she was screaming. She has nice boobs though, right? Yeah, don't answer that." Luke laughed to himself as the man scoffed. 

"Bro, what the hell. Why would I even look there?" Luke laughed even harder at the man's reply, and I took this as my time to walk in. I was fully dressed this time, so it didn't have to be so awkward.

"Hi." Luke said as he grabbed me by my wrist and placed me on his lap. The man looked at me and spoke up. 

"I didn't even know you were in there, I'm so sorry. I'm Robert." He held his hand out for me to shake, but I just stared at him. Realizing he apologized, I smiled and nodded, turning to Luke.

"He's my brother, he's visiting from Sydney with his wife." Luke informed me and I nodded once again. "Anyway, we have a funeral to go to today, mum will be here soon. Tell Jenna I said hi. Nice seeing you again," Luke gave Robert a bro hug and stood me up, taking my hand and dragging me towards the door. 

*I recommend you listen to Fix You & Yellow by Coldplay while reading this part of the chapter, I cried. 

The car ride to the church was silent since we had nothing to say. If this were another funeral, Francesca and Michael would be riding in the back with us, trying to make conversation. But we were going to their funeral, and they were gone.

Once we got to the church, I saw people crying, mourning, and some wearing their poker faces. I was one of those people, but deep down inside, I was hurting. Luke squeezed my hand reassuringly as we walked inside, seeing people from school and people I had no clue about. I saw Ashton with a girl and gave him a small wave, him returning the gesture. The funeral was just about to start. 

A man walked onto the podium and tapped the microphone. "Friends, family, we're gathered here today in loving memory of my daughter, Francesca Cavallini, and her loving boyfriend Michael Clifford." He choked on his words and started tearing up, and my heart shattered. "Today, we will be playing a clip of one of their song covers together, of their song, Fix You." He finished his small intro as he took out a remote and pressed play, causing the white blank wall to be replaced by a colorful backdrop, which I recognized as Michael's room.

"Hiii," Michael said into the camera, showing off his smile that I always adored. "Umm, we'll be doing a cover of Fix You by Coldplay." There were the small sounds of footsteps in the background, then Francesca got into view. 

"I think the reason we chose this song is because.. Because we're both broken. But together, we can fix each other. That's my promise to him, and his to me. It just means a lot." Francesca said as she rubbed her stomach. That's when it hit me.

"And we aren't showing anyone this tape unless it's necessary. If anyone is watching this.. Mom, dad, Lilly, whoever.. I'm pregnant." Francesca choked out as her eyes became glossy. Everyone in the church gasped as she smiled widely at Michael, who took her hand and smiled right back at her. 

"I was thinking of naming it Joey, if it was a boy. You know, like the kangaroo?" Michael said as Francesca laughed, staring at him with such love and adoration in her eyes. 

They started singing, and it was beautiful. It was one of the best five minutes of my life, watching the people I cared so much about being happy together, being in love. It was completely heartbreaking to know they were gone, and they would never come back. Francesca couldn't give birth to her baby, Michael couldn't be a father. Once the song ended, Michael grabbed Francesca and hugged her tightly, and when he was about to kiss her, he reached over to the camera and ended it. 

I turned and saw Calum and Alexa, sitting there. Alexa was picking at her nails, what a heartless bitch. Calum was too hard for me to figure out what was going on in his mind. I recognized Michael's family, his mom and dad, sitting there, holding hands as they looked at the ground in silence. Francesca's family sat there in tears and shock, processing the fact that their baby girl was gone.

"And now, speeches from friends. Any of the pairs friends are welcomed to say some words about the beautiful couple." I instantly let go of Luke's hand and jumped out of my seat, speed walking to the podium, afraid I would break down if I didn't hurry up.

"Um, hi." I awkwardly started. "Michael and Francesca.. Wow. Michael was my best friend, and this has been so hard for me to know he's gone. To know he would never be there for me, because he couldn't. It hurts even more to know his happiness, Francesca, was taken away from him, just like that. The video we just watched, it broke me into pieces. I never saw how happy they made each other until that and--" I was cut off by my tears falling down my face without warning as I placed my elbows on the podium and held my head in my hands, shaking my head frantically. "I'm sorry. It's just really hard for me, it really fucking is. I'm sure it's just as hard for their families and friends, but I just miss them so much." I choked out. People around the church nodded their heads, as if they were agreeing with me, as if they knew the pain I felt. I faced Luke and saw he was tearing up. I faintly smiled at him, assuring I was okay. But I wasn't.

Calum stood up to go to the podium, and I took this as my cue to walk off and stand to the side. I wouldn't go back to my seat, not yet. This wasn't good bye.

"I didn't really know them that well, but I know how much they mean to all of you. It hurts to see you all like this, and it hurts to say this even more, but the guilt has been eating me alive." He quietly said. I held my breath for what he was about to say. When the words came out of his mouth, I felt as if I was about to collapse.

"It was an accident, I was drunk... I.."

"What the hell did you do to my best friends?" I yelled out, tears completely free-falling from my eyes.

"I killed them."


A/N: CLIFFHANGER IM SO SAD THIS WAS SO SAD IM JUST SAD OVERALL

fuck you calum, fuck you