It's Hard To Say "I Do", When I Don't

Chapter 15

Sorry it's been so long since an update. I'm seriously sorry, in having a hard time processing ideas. If you have any tips or comments message me.

"All you have done is so kind, thank to Peter!" I gave him a hug and grabbed the box of pizza and took it to the kitchen and placed it on the counter.

"Well, when you're in a band.. You have more money than you know what to do with. What better way to spend it than helping someone." He smiled following me into the kitchen.

"Well, still thank you. I can always help pay rent. Like seriously it's not that big of a deal. I have 2 jobs so I can afford it." I smiled to him and he just shook his head.

"There is no need for you to have to pay me. Have you seen this house? I need someone else here!" He laughed and just hearing him made me giggle.

"Okay fine, but ill clean when you're gone."

"Deal!" He put out his hand for me to shake and I did so. "Oh, and I hope you don't mind being home alone sometimes. I tend to stay late with the guys."

"Oh that's fine, no big deal." We started walking upstairs into the family room to watch some TV. Halfway going up the stairs he chimed in.

"You could always stay with us. I'm sure they wouldn't mind." I couldn't see his face but by the sound of it he was smiling.

"Either one works." I jumped onto the couch and Pete sat next to me.

*
We put in The Avengers and I started to get tired.

I leaned over and laid my head onto his chest and he just smiled at me. He started petting my heart and I could feel myself to start drifting off.

"Ya know, this is not helping me stay awake." I looked up .and looked at him.

"I'm sorry, would you rather me pull your hair." He smirked and I just shook my head.

"No! I'd just like to stay awake." He bent down and kissed my forehead and I just looked at him. I had a tight grip around his arm and he looked at it. I saw him look at my hand so I loosened my grip and then he turned his look back to me.

He just smiled and I couldn't stop looking into his eyes. It felt like the world was crashing in, but I was wrong, it was just Pete Wentz mouth crashing into mine.

I felt his warm lips and I debated wether or not to pull away but I didn't. I knew I shouldn't be doing this but I couldn't stop. It's like the gravitational pull, and his lips were the sun. I knew This wasn't smart but I just couldn't pull myself away.

I sat up never leaving his lips and he put his hand on my cheek and caressed it. I leaned my head into his hand and kissed him harder. His arm wrapped around the small of my back and he leaned me over to lay on the couch.

Are lips were in a battle that he seemed to be winning. My whole body felt weak underneath him. I wrapped my hands around his arms to pull my body closer to his. He smiled into my lips. He laid me down fully on the couch with his body still attached to mine.

It felt like hours of us kissing until I came to my senses. I pulled my face away and put my hand on his chest.
"I can't do this Pete, me and Erik just broke up. I don't think I'm ready to do this. I think I should go." He lifted himself off of me with a sad look in his eyes that made me feel bad, but I just kept moving.

"I'm sorry Paige, just don't leave please. Lets finish the movie." I just felt bad seeing him sad but I wasn't ready.

"I'm sorry I can't. I don't think right now is a good time to move in to your house with my emotions all screwed up. I'm sorry." I put my shoes on and turned around.

"Okay, just let me walk you out." Pete followed after me an opened the front door for me. "I'm sorry I don't know what came over me. Don't be afraid to come here. Like I said I'm sorry." I turned around and grabbed his hand.

"I wasn't scared, I just am not ready." With that I turned around and left his property.

*

I got home and jumped into the shower letting the hot water wash away all frustration. I sat down on the bottom of the shower and just cried, I couldn't hold it in anymore... I just couldn't.

I pulled my knees to my chest and just let it all out. I could barely deal with Erik and now Pete. I'm .pretty sure I just screwed this whole thing up. After all he offered to do for me I couldn't just kiss him?

Who am I kidding? Him offering me to move in with him doesn't obligate me to kiss him. I need to get my head straight before I do anything stupid.

I couldn't deal with this anymore I felt the hot water run over my body. Oddly enough it really helped. I felt so much better once I got out.

I checked what time it was and saw that it was just past 10:00. I saw that I had 2 texts. One from Erik and the other from Sarah. I didn't bother to look at Erik's I just went in and deleted his number. I opened Sarah's text and read it.

Sarah: I heard what happened, text me. If you need to talk I'm always here.

I didn't bother to answer her text I just put my phone on the charger and listened to Fall Out Boy.

I was going to wake up and be okay. I will forget about Erik, and tomorrow I will fix everything with Pete. I rolled over in bed and smiled listening to the lyrics.
I've seen sinking ships go down with more grace than you.

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Just felt like adding those lyrics(:
So just to get to know you guys, what's your favorite Fall Out Boy song? Comment you answer!

-xoxox Faith