Lucy Snape and the Return of Lord Zuc (Book Four)

As long as I have you, nothing matters

Chapter 28: As long as I have you, nothing matters

After a little while Shona left to go to the common room to annoy her brother, Martyn, and catch up on the latest news with Fred and George (but Lucy thought that she'd get a hug around the waist from Seamus, as after all the poor sod wasn't that tall.) 

Which left Snape and Lucy in the dungeons, both feeling very depressed and not knowing what to think about the fact that they were related. 

"Just so we're clear, Lucy, this is none of your fault." Snape said before Lucy could start critizing herself as she always did. 

"But I'm causing everyone so much trouble! Can't you see I'm a mistake!" She protested, she frantically held her tears in. Even though she knew she was a mistake she had to be brave and just get on with life. 

"You're not a mistake, not at all. If you were a mistake I wouldn't be looking after you, would I?" 

"But you didn't know we were related when you took me in!" 

"Exactly, and I'll still love you the same," he whispered and gave her a hug as she stared down longingly at the pictures of her mother.

"Life's complicated isn't it?" Lucy sighed. 

"It is, and I have deep sorrow for you as you'll grow up without a mother. Just a father who barely knows how to parent."

"I think you're doing pretty well on your own, you know. You might make mistakes but that's what happens in life."

"Well, I suppose you're right."  

The two stood there awkwardly and hoped that either one of them would break the silence, or their embrace. Lucy was the one to let go, though. She turned back to the photo album and closed it and then looking up at Snape.

"As you've said you were totally unaware of me when I was born, so i've got a question for you." She said. Snape nodded and she continued. "So, I have a first name, a second name and no middle name. Do you want to give me a middle name?" 

"I suppose I could come up with one," Snape asked with a shrug. "Do you think we should head off now?" 

 "I guess so." 

 Snape smiled sadly. It had been a while since he'd visited Lily's grave, well the last time he visited was a couple of days before he met Lucy. He took his cape and slipped it on and the two headed out of the door. 

Snape had asked Dumbledore if it was OK if he lifted the enchantment to apparate in his office for a few hours so they would have enough time to apparate to Godric's hollow and back. 

As they walked through the snow, they were given many looks from passers by. They knew that the two were family but found it odd they were related as Snape had only adopted her. Even Lucy and Snape still found that fact...Strange. 

When they entered Dumbledore's office he seemed very happy to see them. He stood up and greeted the two. 

"It's very nice to see both of you," Dumbledore smiled. "Will you be heading off now?" 

"Yes, we will thank you, Albus," Snape replied with just a simple nod of his head. Lucy just looked around the office sadly, hoping she would somehow go un-noticed.

"Ah, good I just lifted the enchantment for two hours precisely so you better hurry along."

Lucy took hold of Snape's arm and waited patiently and watched Dumbledore's office disappear into nothingness and she was taken to a little village that she guessed was Godric's hollow. The snow settled on the rooftops making it almost look like Hogsmeade, the perfect winter scene. 

But even though they had safely apparated to the village, Lucy still hadn't let go of Snape's arm. He smiled sadly and carefully detached her hand and held onto it. He was shocked to find how cold she was. He stroked her hair then she looked up at him. 

"It'll be alright," he whispered giving her a quick kiss on the top of the head. 

"Is mum's grave far?" She replied so it was just audible. It still unnerved Snape slightly to hear Lucy say 'mum' it was as though it was Forbidden. 

"Not too far." 

She nodded and the two walked down the path and into the graveyard hand in hand. They trekked along the uneven path that separated rows and rows of graves, it was as though it was a walk of gloom and Snape really didn't know if he could do this. But he had to be brave for his daughter. 

After all, she was the last thing he had of Lily. 

But when they had walked down a few more rows searching for the grave, Snape spotted it. As Lucy had wandered off on her own to search for it, Snape beckoned her over and she obeyed his command. 

As Lucy walked over Snape was brushing the snow off of the gravestone to reveal James and Lily Potter's grave. She had no idea that they had been buried together but it seemed quite natural as they had died together. 

Snape stood up from where he had been kneeling then looked down at Lucy, she just stared at the lettering blankly. He really worried about her as she hadn't been herself since they had found out they were related, she was very...out... 

"Mum deserved better," Lucy spoke up all of a sudden, startling Snape. 

"Indeed she did," Snape replied a little smugly but hid his tone and tried to give the best sympathy possible. 

Lucy opened her bag suddenly and pulled out the flowers she had picked earlier. She knelt down on the snow then placed the flowers on top of the grave. She didn't really want to give them to James Potter but was forced to as they both had the same graves. 

"Your mothers favourite," Snape whispered softly, helping her up again. 

"I'm glad I chose the right ones," Lucy's voice cracked and without warning tears fell. 

Snape tried his best not to cry with her. He wrapped his arms around her again and held her close, running his fingers through her now blue hair. He wished it didn't have to be this way, he wished Lily was his wife that way Lucy would be a lot happier. If there was one thing he hated was his daughter being upset. 

'Damn you, Potter,' he thought. 

Then he really cried, he couldn't prevent himself from doing so. He hadn't cried over Lily in years but he really was crying for Lucy. The girl who would never grow up with a mother and had been forced into fighting without really knowing what she was doing 

"Shh, it's OK," he whispered, his own voice cracking. He slashed away his tears and cursed himself for being so pathetic. 

"Nothing's ever OK. But as long as - " 

" - I have you" 

"Nothing matters." 

That's all they needed was each other because with each other they were safe...