The Shady Adventures of Fabian

Chapter 20

They tiptoed their way past the dwarfs who were busy swinging pickaxes. Fabian searched around for a gem that would be small enough to carry with them, but he didn't see any and he reluctantly admitted to himself that escaping unnoticed was more important at the moment. He figured he could always return later for a big score.

They found a wide tunnel lit by torchlight that seemed to lead uphill. Fabian reasoned that this was most likely the exit so they scurried their way in. It took them what felt like over an hour and they had to duck against the wall a few times when dwarfs came walking by, but they eventually saw daylight up ahead.

They emerged in a grassy meadow with a small creek running through it. A little village of stone cottages lay directly ahead. "That must be where the dwarfs live," Fabian said.

"It must also be where they took Oogums," Brandon said.

"Oh yeah, the cat," Fabian said. He had been distracted by daydreams of robbing the dwarfs blind.

"I guess we should knock on all the doors and find out which house belongs to this Thark person," Brandon said. "Then we ask them for Oogums."

"And what if they say no?" Fabian said.

"Well, then we just explain to them that there's a lady who's heartbroken over the loss of her beloved pet, and I'm sure any reasonable person would give the cat to us to return to her."

"Do these seem like reasonable people to you?" Fabian asked. "They just locked us up in a cage with a giant rabid rat. I don't think they're going to just hand the cat over. We need to figure out a way to break this shrinking spell that's been cast on us. I'm not used to dwarfs being able to push me around. I don't like it. I remember this one time I was in this tavern and a dwarf accused me of picking his pocket. I actually did pick his pocket, but that's not important right now. He got so mad he charged at me. I held him back by his forehead with one hand while he swung his arms impotently at me and got madder and madder. It was hilarious. You should have been there, Scrote."

"It sounds like a delightful time, sir, but how do we go about breaking this spell?"

"As much as I don't like it, we're probably going to have to find us some sort of magic user," Fabian said.

"Where are we going to find one, sir? I learned in school that dwarfs are distrustful of magic and generally avoid it."

"That's true, but we're not going to the dwarf village yet. Don't worry, magical beings are everywhere. They're like cockroaches. We'll find one. Especially if we're still in the Enchanted Forest, which truth be told I'm not entirely sure where we are after being underground for so long. Being as small as we are, we can't have covered all that much ground, so I bet you if we walk back into the tree line we'll find ourselves in magic country. We'll just have to try to catch us a gnome or a pixie or something. But first, let me wash off this rat blood I'm covered in. You might want to rinse off, too. I didn't want to say anything earlier, but you smell kind of weird."

They took a quick dunk in the creek and then wandered back into the forest to look around. They hadn't been searching long when a bright red luminescent light flew past them rapidly.

"What the heck was that?" Brandon asked.

"It was either some kind of fairy or maybe a sprite, but whatever it was, I'm pretty sure it was magic. Let's follow it."

They walked deeper into the woods and every so often they thought they caught another glimpse of the flying light, but they couldn't quite seem to get a good, clear look at it.

"Do you think it could be leading us into some kind of trap?" Brandon asked.

"Yeah, you're right," Fabian said after a moment's thought. "It almost certainly is. You'd better go on up ahead, just in case."

"Is it just me or do you hear somebody singing?" Brandon asked.

Fabian strained his ears and listened. Very faintly he thought he heard a woman's voice singing a haunting melody somewhere off to the left. "It could still be a trap, but we'd better investigate this. Take the lead, Scrote. I'll be right behind you."

The singing became progressively louder as they made their way through the woods. Suddenly Brandon spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her hair was a long flowing green color and she was wearing almost nothing, except for some strategically placed leaves. She also appeared to be growing out of a large oak tree.

The woman stopped singing when she spotted Brandon. "Well, hello there, cutie,"

"Good day, ma'am," Brandon said. His voice cracked involuntarily.

"Shut up, Scrote," Fabian said as he pushed his way past. "She was obviously speaking to me."

"Actually I was talking to him," the woman said as she pointed at Brandon. "But it's nice to meet you, too. It gets so lonely out here in the woods. It's wonderful to have some company once in awhile."

"The pleasure's all mine," Fabian said as he took her hand and kissed it. "Say, uh, you wouldn't happen to be a magical being, by chance would you."

"I am a dryad," the woman said. "I am the spirit of this tree and have lived here for hundreds of years. I daresay I have picked up a little magical knowledge during my long life."

"Oh come on, you don't look a day over ninety," Fabian said. "Look, I'll just cut to the chase here. We've had a horrible spell cast upon us that has reduced us to this miniscule size. You wouldn't, by any chance, know how to break a spell like that, would you?"

"I once owned a bracelet that could do such a thing. It was an item of great power and incalculable value. Alas, it was stolen by a deceitful little gnome."

"Wait a minute," Fabian said. "Was it a silver bracelet? And was it stolen by a little old gnarled gnome who talked in a high pitched voice?"

"Why, yes, both of those things are true," the dryad said.

"That no good lying gnome," Fabian gnashed his teeth. "I knew that bracelet was valuable. We shouldn't have left it in that hole, Scrote."

"I guess not," Brandon said as he scratched his head.

"Fear not," the dryad said. "I know of other ways to break enchantments. It will require you to gather a couple of items for me. First there is a swamp not far from here where there grows a special root called nightshade. It has bright red leaves and grows from the ground in numerous spots. It must be plucked precisely at midnight or it will lose all of its powers. I shall also require the nectar of a certain flower that blooms just one day a year. It grows out of a large boulder that lies on the far side of the swamp. You will recognize the flower by its unusual shape, for it looks very much like a foot."

"A foot?" Fabian asked.

"Yes. It smells much like a foot as well. One that has not been washed in months."

"Well, that sounds enticing," Fabian said. "How are we supposed to get this nectar if it only blooms once a year?"

"There is a way to trick it into blooming early," the dryad said. "You must lick it."

"Did you say lick it?"

"Yes, and I am told that it tastes like a sweaty foot that has marched back and forth through a heavily used latrine for hours upon end with just a hint of cheese."

"This sounds like a job for you, Scrote. I'm glad I brought you along."

"One other thing," the dryad said. "The flower will only respond to the tongue of a man who has known the touch of a woman."

"I've never kissed a girl," Brandon said with a shrug. "Honestly, I've never even held hands with one."

"Are you completely worthless?" Fabian sighed. "Fine, I suppose I'll have to be the one to lick the damn flower. Is there anything else?"

"Oh yes, I will need a handful of dirt."

"Now that I've got covered," Fabian said as he bent over and scooped up some dirt. He handed it to the dryad. "Now let's go to that swamp and get this nightshade."

"Also beware the will-o'-the-wisp," the dryad called out after them, although she wasn't sure if they heard her.