The Alpha's First Choice

24. Jealous?

Liam:

I took a deep breath before hesitantly knocking at her door.

'I can do it' I kept on repeating to myself.

"Who's it?" she knows it's me. She's not going to make it easy for me, is she?

"It's me, Mom. Can I have a minute?" I tried controlling my anxious voice.

Maybe this isn't such a good idea. I just realized that I haven't had a proper conversation with my mother in years. After Maya, she tried to console me, to share my pain, but I shut her off. I hated everyone and everything. I hated the pitiful looks they gave me. I was rude to her, over and over again. That was the only way I thought would make her give up.

They think I don't know how they try to be careful and conscious around me. Anything that made them happy, they wouldn't discuss it around me. They thought their happiness would make me sad, not realizing how their actions are hurting me more.

Eva was probably right, how would they know what I want from them if I don't express myself? But I'm not good at talking, I never have been. How I wish she could do the talking for me.

"Liam" my mother said opening the door to her room "What a surprise" She looked genuinely taken aback "Is something wrong?"

Great, my mother thinks the only reason I would talk to her is if something's wrong.

"No" I said scratching the back of my head "I just wanted to talk to you, mom"

"Me?" she pulled me towards the couch by the window "Of course, love, tell me" looking intently at me.

"I.......I, how are you?" I said awkwardly

She looked at me for a while, as if trying to make sense of what's happening. A bright smile lit up in her face, she relaxed "Are we doing the 'hellos' and 'how are yous' today?" she inquired.

My mother is a beautiful woman, but she becomes the most beautiful one when she smiles like that. It takes away my pain and makes me warm. I missed this smile. I'm glad I'm here today.

I smiled "I'm weird, right"

She pulled my face with both her hands "Yes you are" she grinned "And that's your charm" she said placing a sloppy kiss in my cheek.

"ewww..... mom" I wiped my cheek as soon as she let me go "I'm 32" I reminded her.

She shrugged "You're my baby"

"Your baby has a baby of his own" I rolled my eyes at her.

"Yes" her eyes shined with happiness "And he's the most beautiful baby ever. You know, when you and Evan were little, I thought no one could ever be as handsome as my boys. But then my grandson came along and I realized how ugly you guys were as children"

I held my hand to my chest "ouch"

It's impossible to not be dramatic when you're around my mother. I think my father got his occasional streak of drama as a side effect of being around my mother for too long.

"Don't beat yourself too much" she said "He has you and Eva for parents after all" my heart skipped a beat at her name, it has become a habitual reaction these days "I don't know if you remember this, but you fell in love with her the moment you laid your eyes on her" she smiled distantly. I could feel heat rising up my face.

"No, that's not true" I am not going to have this conversation with my mother. I'll be teased to death if I acknowledge it.

"You were too young to remember" she smiled "She was so beautiful that you wanted to exchange her for Evan. I should tell Evan how you rejected him" she grinned conspiratorially "You started playing more and more with Zach and Nick just to catch a glance of her. You would take your book and sit where Evan and she played. You continuously complained about how loud they were but never moved away. The Liam who kept himself locked in his room otherwise, surely had other places he could read a book in peace?" she laughed as I glared "You really were obsessed with her"