death is a topic
often not held at dinner tabel talk.
tonight at my table it was.
with hearing of the passing
of charles manson on the radio
while my brother soaked
in his morning bubble bath.
he never quite understood death.
like many the thought scarred
him to much.
something he hated hearing
about no matter who it was
even a famous cult leader
a random man on the news
my baba who passed about
four summers ago.
often getting stopped and ask
at funerals where my mothers
only son was
she would try to explain
that nolan did care
about the recent passing
of our family.
its just he doesn't understand it
he works himself up to much
then cloapses to a mop of curls
and salty tears into the pewds
of the church.
he is easily frightened
by the coffin.
never wanting to get out
of the car whenever we vist
my uncle and grandmother
at the cemetery.
tonight at our dinner table
my brother fell into his
chair once more becoming
nothing more then curls and tears
he did not understand.
asking students in the hallway
if one day
they to will go to heaven
when they pass.
trying to explain
something as heavy as this
to someone even my brother
is one of the hardest things to do.
trying to stay optimistic
about something
that we don't know anything about
or whateven happens
after the fucking fact.
my mother trys to assure him
hes in good health.
he then questions
our great aunts and uncles
my oma and opa my grandfather.
scarred they to will leave us
one day;
leave him.
he's never been one
one to deal with change
nevermind when you elimate
any and all new experinces
with this person.
optimism can only take you so far
cause the truth is
i really don't know.
i'm sorry noly
i really just don't know.
10:55 pm
YOU ARE READING
altercation of self-actualization《poetry
Poetryal•ter•ca•tion noun 1. a noisy argument or disagreement espically in public self-ac•tu•al•i•za•tion noun 1. the realization or fulfilment of ones talents and potentialities, espically conisdered as a drive or need present in everyone
