Take My Hand: Walking Dead Fanfic

Chapter 18-Focus

Chapter 18

•Joslyn•

Carl's face lost all expression. His knees failed on him as he sank to the ground, holding his stomach. His jaw shook with every breath he tried to take in and tears escaped his eyes as he tried to hold them back. He swallowed, leaning over and he bent down.

I saw Rick do nothing. Nothing.

Carl cared for her more than he did.

I turned back to Carl, seeing him spitting to the ground as he finished vomitting, sitting on his knees when he was done.

No one spoke. It was silent. You could hear the sadness and solemness in the air-until Carl got up-the weeds and leaves rustle underneath him...

Carl wiped his bottom lip, heading past me to his. He shivered and struggled, sadness with every breath he took and disappointment escaped his eyes as it trailed to his father's.

"You had her..."
"I know, Carl...but when-"
"You held her-IN. YOUR. HANDS."

Carl's voice began cracking and all I saw was his side view-his red cheeks, his glossy blue eyes, and a chiseled jaw that rattled up and down.

Carl went to hit Rick, Rick just looking down, leaning back on a tall, moss-covered rock, only positioning back farther to where he looked as he flinched his head back. Michonne came from behind Carl, grabbing him as he sank to the ground. His limbs went numb, all his bones immobile and he just laid there.

The ancient parking lot was where he rested his head and the rest of his body laid in the dark green grass and he just looked up to the sky...

Carl

I know he isn't real now, Joslyn can't fight me on this one.
-
It was later, much later. I had tried distracting myself as the long, wordless four hours had passed and the night sky turned to a dark, sea blue. I put my two hands between the sun and the horizon, closing my eye to focus and I counted.

I learned how to tell time-from Daryl.

My dad couldn't teach me any of that,
I mourned.
He can only love one thing at a time. Focus on one thing at a time. Care for one thing...

It was about six o'clock; I figured after using the technique Daryl taught me.

Maggie and Michonne had started a fire to try and calm the mood. I just focused on hating my dad right now.

How could he just leave her in there?

I wiped the tears from under my eyes, looking through my painted, blotched vision and I looked to my dad, then past him. There was Joslyn, only a couple feet away, and she was sitting on a low branch in the woods.

Might as well focus on something else.

I got up. Michonne held something out to me, but I passed to quickly to notice what it was. I got closer to where my dad was, leaning against the massive rock he leaned upon. His hand came upon my shoulder, yet I shrugged it off. He pulled me away from Joslyn once; I wasn't going to let it happen again.