Take My Hand: Walking Dead Fanfic

Chapter 21-Lies

Chapter 21

•Joslyn•

I woke up the next morning and we were in the same spot. Luckily, walkers aren't attracted to the back of drugstores, but what's inside. I had no idea how to tell time anymore, but I say it's about 6 a.m., because the sun was out and I was still thinking of falling back to the ground.

My sleep was awful. My head ached, stomach curved, and every time I closed my eyes, I would rapidly open them after about three seconds. I had no idea why. I have slept outside before, and I held my knife exactly in jabbing position. The group surrounded me, Carl insisted on lying down next to me...Carl.

My eyes widened as I looked from side to side. The night before, after I scooted away a couple times, Carl lied down next to me. He wasn't there. My lips trembled, every breath breathing hot, worried fire.

"Carl!"

I whispered. I stood up, lying my hand on top of my gun, just in case. My knife was held in my hand and I held it even higher, passing the giant rock, realizing Rick was gone too. I passed the half-burned wood from the fire that eventually burned out. I looked to the store, smoke was still rising.

I walked my feet parallel to the side of the building, practically blending to the wall. My light green flannel was camouflaged, the wall claiming to be a light beige, but light, sickly green. I heard a bang of something, like a fist against glass. To my surprise, I was right.

My eyes slowly looked around the corner, seeing Rick and Carl talking near the front of the store.

"Dad, why cant she just-"
"No, Carl. She can't stay. She's too much of a distraction for you."

My hand slipped into my pocket. Well, Carl's pocket, and his jacket engraved my hips, tied at the front.

"I thought you didn't care."

Rick tested Carl. I knew what he was doing. Parents do this all the time.

"Judith. You care about her...don't you."

I could see Carl's heart dropping, his hand slipping into his pocket as all of his fingers except his thumb hung out.

"Carl..."

Rick licked his lips. Tears came to his eyes as he bent down, Carl's body immobile.

"That's d-different."
"You held her."
"I-I know but-"
"BUT NOTHING! You let her slip right between you! She's gone now! Do you want to see another die?!"

Carl took a step back after his little outburst. His dad removed his hands from his knees as his back straightened.

"Son, you can't get too attach-"

"I know, dad. I just...we have to keep people safe. I don't care."

My heart skipped, the beats going erratic as my breathing got heavier and faster. My jaw shook and I swallowed the giant lump in my throat, which was going to be something I was going to say, but I kept it to myself.

I aimlessly walked back to our "camp".

He lied to me.

My knife slid back to its holder that was attached on my belt.

I sat down, picking up a stick and I traced the grass.

If I'm gone, it will be better.

I thought.

Don't let them know. Make a plan.

I turned as Carl and Rick came around the corner. At first, I wanted to crawl and roll down into a ditch, then I put on a no-teeth smile and sheepishly waved.

Rick's arm was around Carl's shoulder and Carl's head bent down, the rim of his hat covering his face.

"Hi."

I said, greeting the unreliable person who sat to my left.

"Hi, Joslyn. When did you wake up?"
"Oh, about a minute ago."

Lying was easy.

"Carl."

Carl turned his head up to his dad's direction. His dad fixed his gun, loading a new round of bullets into it.

"Start to get all the bags together. We'll be gone soon."

Carl looked at me and I smiled, putting my bag over my shoulder.

So will I.