Reckless

Chapter Three ; The Search

Six weeks have gone by and I still haven’t been able to find her. Each day that passes the feeling in the pit of my stomach tells me something horrible has happened. There is also this thick film of failure that has taken me over. “Twenty-One…Twenty-two…Twenty-three…” I count out loud as I push the weights up. The gym has been my go-to place to try to release some of my frustrations. I missed her so much that the sadness I felt was quickly turning to anger and the only way to keep me in line is to sweat it out. “Forty…” The metal bar clanked against the rack, my body rested against the bench. “Yo, Liam… another rough day?” I looked up to see Alex leaning against the wall. “As is everyday…” I mumbled, pulling myself up and grabbing my water bottle. Alex has been my go to during this whole thing; he even went to her home town over Thanksgiving break to see if she traveled home for the holidays. “Alex, I think I am going to go talk to Lacy again. I can’t believe that Sam wouldn’t at least contact her once to let her know that she was okay.” I took a swig of water as I tried to judge Alex’s reaction. “I think you’re right, she acted funny when I asked her about it too. I guess it could just be the fact that her best friend is missing but I don’t know something seems off…” He shrugged as he followed me towards the door. “I’m going to talk to her then, are you coming or…” before I could finish my sentence he shook his head wildly, “Oh hell no, if I am even in the same room as you when you suggest she’s lying she will cut off my balls. This is all on you dude.” I let out a soft chuckle, shaking my head as I headed to my car.

During the drive I began laying out my questions in my head, I wanted to be prepared as possible because Lacy was too good at hiding things from me. I pulled up in front of the apartment, a sad feeling growing in my belly. I do my best to push my feelings aside as I head inside. “LACE?” I call out as I push the front door open. “What do you want loser?” She asked, as she sat on the couch, popping grapes into her mouth. I plopped down on the couch beside her, swinging my arm over her shoulder. “What I can’t come visit my best friend?” I scoffed, stealing one of her grapes and popping it into my mouth. “Oh whatever, you want something don’t you?” Her eyes narrowed as she glanced over at me. “Lace, you know why I am here.” She let out a loud sigh as she scooted away from me. “Listen, I told you I don’t know where she is.” She popped another grape into her mouth as her eyes focused on the TV. “But you HAVE heard from her, am I right?” She didn’t respond, she just stared off in the other direction. “You have!” I yelled grabbing her and pulling her closer. “Lace, you have got to tell me! When did she contact you? What did she say?” She let out a sigh and reached up and turned off the TV. “Okay! So, I heard from her about two weeks ago maybe? But she didn’t say where she was staying or anything like that. She called crying apologizing for everything. She was a wreck. She hung up before I could get anything else out of her.I tried to call the number back, but it was a payphone.” She shrugged, “I’m not sure if she is in a good place, mentally. She was really upset the night I spoke to her.”

I could feel myself get slightly angry with Lacy, if she had seemed so off why did she wait so long to tell me this information. “Why didn’t you tell me?” My eyes were focused on the floor, my fingers running though my hair. I’m sure she could sense my worry, she knew how much Sam meant to me. “I didn’t want to get your hopes up or anything…I have the number of the payphone if you want it?” My eyes flickered back up to her, my head nodding profusely. She got up from the couch and made her way over to a note pad that hung on the refrigerator. She tore off the corner of the paper and made her way back over to where I was sitting. “Here.” My eyes lit up as they scanned over the paper, 503-256-8842. “503 … that’s Portland…” Without saying another word, I jumped off the couch and ran out to my car. The engine roared to life and I wasted no time calling Alex. What the hell was Sam doing in Portland, as far as I know from my little research, she had no family there, so why would she pick there?

Alex and I packed up our bags and were getting ready for a trip to Portland. If there is any chance at all that Sam is there I can use some of my work connections to track her down. We didn’t tell Lacy what we were doing, just in case. Once we loaded up all our stuff we headed out for the long drive. “So, what’s your plan when we get there?” Alex asked, flipping through the radio stations as we traveled out of our usual stations radius. “Remember Willie? The old guy who used to work for dad out of Portland?” I asked, keeping my eyes focused on the road ahead of us. “Yea the old motorcycle dude, right?” I nodded, signaling into the fast lane. “He is going to lend me a hand, he tracked down the area of the payphone, I’d say if she’s still up there then that would be the best place to start looking.” Alex nodded, finally settling on a station. The rest of the ride was slow, painfully slow. Could this finally be it? Could I really find her and get her back? My mind was racing with all the possibilities of what the next few days may or may not hold for them.

After several hours of driving they finally made their way to the hotel, just three blocks from the payphone Sam had used to call Lacy. Most likely she didn’t think about someone tracking a payphone number so there is a good chance she is nearby. After getting checked in I sent Willie a text.

Liam: Willie, we are at the hotel. Where should we start?

Willie: I would start with some of the local food places and bars. Stick local, none of that chain bullshit. Tell them Willie sent ya and if you have any problems give me a ring.

Alex and I wasted no time at all, we sat out on foot and followed the directions to the payphone. There it was, right outside of a local eatery. I stood in front of it, my fingers lingering over the buttons. I knew how silly it was but knowing she had been here gave me some kind of comfort. When I had finally snapped out of it, Alex was already talking to someone inside the eatery. “Liam, we have a hit.” He mumbled as he made his way back over to me. “He said she’s been here to get coffee a few times before they close. Always late in the evening so I would guess she lives close.” A spark of hope flashed though me as we split up and began scouring both sides of the street, asking anyone if they had seen her.

We spent three hours showing people her picture, but the eatery was the only place we could find someone that recognized her. We decided that there wasn’t much more we could do for the night. It had begun raining which only seemed fitting for the mood I was in currently. “Come on man, there is a bar up here, let’s grab us a drink before we head back to the hotel.” I nodded, following him into the small dive bar.

The room was dark, and the thick smell of cigarettes and cigars overtook my nostrils. “I’ll grab us some drinks, you want a beer?” Alex asked, motioning towards the bar. “Nah, I need something stronger. Grab me some whiskey…” I slumped down into a booth along the wall, resting my head in my hands. I had such high hopes for today, but reality was beating me down once again. Alex snapped me out of my thoughts as he slid the glass in front of me. “Cheers man…” His eyes had a hint of sympathy. I must look like a total fool at this point. What am I doing? I downed the whiskey, letting the warmth run down my throat and fill my chest.

After sitting in the bar for about thirty minutes Alex excused himself back to the hotel so he could call Lacy. I sat alone in the booth, drinking away my somber outlook. As I finished my last drink, I decided I’d take a leak then head back to the hotel to pass out. I started down the small hallway towards the bathrooms; I lingered in the hallway for a moment when I overheard someone talking in the storage room. “Samara, you need to fill up the ice trough!” A deep mans voice bellowed from around the corner. “I’ll go do that now.” A soft reply called out, but I must be more drunk that I thought I was because it sounded just like her. Fuck, I’m losing my mind.” I mumble to myself as I push the men’s bathroom door open. After taking care of my business, I couldn’t shake how familiar the sound of that voice was, I really needed to get some sleep, I thought as I stepped back out into the bar. That is when I saw her, standing behind the bar refilling the ice trough. It was Sam, but she was thinner, her clothes hanging over the tiny frame. She looked exhausted, dark circles lined under her eyes. My heart felt like it was breaking in my chest, she looked miserable.

Slowly, in hopes that my mind was playing tricks on me, I made my way over to the bar. I stood there just a few feet away from her, the exhaustion even more noticeable now. I watched her quietly praying this wasn’t some kind of fucked up dream. “Ahem…” I cleared my throat, trying to get her attention. “One second…” she mumbled as she dumped the rest of the ice into the trough, she sat the bucket down and wiped her hands on the back of her jeans. “Alright what can I get yo-“She stopped, the words trailing off her tongue as she looked up, her eyes meeting mine.