vkook|taekook smut & one shots

what are friends for?

pairing: taekook/vkook
genre: smut, slight angst
words: 3.5k

by: micmicbun-jin on tumblr. https://micmicbun-jin.tumblr.com/post/168492985932/what-are-friends-for

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"Hyung?"

"Hmm."

"How accurate is porn?"

The way Taehyung raises his eyebrows at Jeongguk as he peers at him over his phone screen makes the tips of his ears burn red.

"Not very. Nobody sounds like that in real life, unless they're faking. If they do happen to sound like that, it means you're doing an awful job."

Jeongguk looks away quickly, fiddling with his thumbs in his lap, cursing the fact that Taehyung could be so nonchalant about something.

"Guk. Are you a virgin?"

Jeongguk splutters. "Me? A virgin? No way!"

"Guk."

"Maybe."

"That's cute. Never done anything sexual?" Jeongguk wants to die. He should have just googled his question on some forum for perverts.

"Nope."

"First kiss?"

"No."

Taehyung doesn't seem to sense the finality in Jeongguk's tone, wanting to drop the subject immediately.

"If you ever need any help, getting girls or anything, I got you, yeah?" Jeongguk sighs. This is going to be a long conversation.

"I don't need help getting girls, hyung."

"Boys? I'm also very good with them."

He doesn't doubt it. Taehyung's good with everyone.

"I'm not gay. Just shy. And perfectly happy with my hand."

"Alright. Wouldn't want your hand to get jealous."

Taehyung's laughing but he's also dropping the subject and Jeongguk sends a silent thank you up above.

Jeongguk actually lets himself believe that Taehyung has truly dropped the subject of Jeongguks (lacking) sex life, which is stupid, because it's Taehyung. The number of things he keeps stored in his head just for the sake of embarrassing Jeongguk is infinite. He still brings up the time Jeongguk tried using a palm tree as a stripper pole, trying to climb it and do one of the back wards dips he's seen. Granted, he'd been piss drunk and fell flat on his face after making it a foot off the ground. He still has a scar on his cheek, but the fall didn't hurt as much as his ego.

It doesn't matter that they're best friends, that they've known each other for years, practically since they've been in diapers. Taehyung still lives to to see Jeongguk flushed and stuttering as he hides his face from humiliation.

Which leads to right now, where Taehyung's telling their (Taehyungs; Jeongguk just tags along) entire friend groups about how sweet innocent Jeongguk actually is sweet little Jeongguk. Hoseok groans loudly in disappointment, claiming that he thought his shyness was just an act, that he was really some sort of Christian Grey in the bedroom. Jin throws a shrimp roll at him, smacking Hoseok in the cheek before rolling to the ground as Jin scolds him for being so vulgar at the dinner table, God forbid. Hoseok just shrugs and shoves the whole thing in his mouth.

"I think it's sweet. Little Jeonggukkie saving himself for marriage, his knight in shining armor to sweep in and fuck him to the ninth dimension."

Jeongguk swallows loudly. He's used to being embarrassed, has been for the last two hours and the majority of his life. But he'd never told them he was gay, he isn't gay, and it irks him more than it should that they would just assume.