The Love That Never Fade

Uncertainty

"I can write the saddest poem of all tonight.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too."
- Pablo Neruda

Addy saw a message in her phone. The producer, Laurie was going to handle a meeting for her, Toby, Torr and Megan in her office by 3 pm. She hasn't seen Toby quite a while. He was a bit quiet recently, intentionally or unintentionally? She understood that everyone was quite busy before they started the new season. She felt she was missing him since their last encounter nearby the lake.

She sighed. She really missed him right now. She guessed he was confused, she guessed that he must really love her but he was afraid, of what? she couldn't confirm...he seemed running away from her. Addy slowly didn't understand him. If he really loved her, why made a distance between them. Why make it so hard for both of them? Why not made it official? What made him change abruptly?

"What is it Adde? You've been looking at your phone in ages," Caitlin asked smilingly. Addy looked at her with a smile, thinly.

"Nothing. Just a meeting with Laurie," Addy said plainly.

"I don't think that troubles you... Addy, may I ask you... Is it anything wrong with Toby? I didn't see him around quite long. Is he okay?" Addy looked at her. She gave a concern look at Addy who seemed a bit alarmed. Why she has to mention him right now? She sighed.

"Do I look so much in trouble? Cait, I don't know anything about him... What Toby has to do with me?" Addy voiced out, slightly upset.

"I guessed you're quite close to him... I'm sorry, I might be wrong. I heard Toby is moving out to Alan's apartment... I just heard from Alan since someone else interested with his apartment. He agreed to rent it to Toby once he moved out to LA. Did he mention this to you?" Caitlin said calmly. Addy felt more alarmed. Toby never mentioned or discussed anything about it. Why Toby? Why left me out?

Addy looked at her, felt messed up. She didn't know what to say.

"Addy, anything happened to him? He's okay?" Caitlin asked again but Addy felt more angry with the conversation.

"I don't know Cait! Why are you kept asking me about him? He's not my boyfriend!" she screamed angrily. Then she regretted it. She was a bit emotional.

"Cool Adde... Relax. I'm just asking. You don't have to be angry with me. I'm trying to figure out," Caitlin was surprised with Addy's reaction. Addy cupped her face, confused with her own self. Why she was so angry? She loved him, probably too much already.

"I'm sorry. So sorry Cait... I got easily stress out nowadays. I'm blaming my hormones. Sorry?" Addy tried to smile weakly in the end. Caitlin came to her side and hugged her from her side.

"Addy, I just want you to listen what I said, just keep calm.... since both of you quite close, I'm suggesting you just talk to him, privately. Probably he didn't want to share anything except with you. I know he trust you. That's the easiest way to clarify anything," Addy just nodded. Her eyes was glistening with tears. Quickly she closed her eyes, not wanting Cait to see it. She honestly wanted him so much but there was no chance to express her feelings. She felt lost.

She texted him immediately after, and waited for his reply but no immediate answer. Did he knew he should come to a meeting after lunch? He forgot?

She was looking forward to meet him after the meeting. To clarify her thoughts. For so many unanswered questions. But at the same time, Addy felt quite upset with him too. Recently, she saw some gossips in the social media discussed that he was not serious in any relationship. The fans discussed the reasons he decided to break up with his previous girlfriends - he sometimes has wierd preference with girls, very private person and and she guessed the way he didn't make any further move with her, already proved it. She chose not to believe but couldn't remove her doubts.