part of me | e.d

twenty-five

i blink a few times, trying to make sense of the scene in front of me.

kara's pulling him into her by his neck, and i can hear ethan trying to murmur something as he places his hands on her waist and pushes her away.

once their lips are disconnected, i can see the anger in ethan's face. "what the fuck, kara?" he wipes his mouth, taking a few steps back from her.

"baby, don't act like you didn't like it. i felt you kiss back." she crosses her arms, raising her eyebrows.

his eyes are narrowed on her, and then they flicker towards the doorway and that's when he sees me.

we stand in complete silence, making eye contact for what feels like forever. i can feel tears stinging my eyes as i finally turn around and start walking down the hallway.

i hear ethan's footsteps running after me. "rylin! rylin, wait!" he grabs my arm, turning me to face him.

i look into his eyes, feeling heartbroken. "is that true? you kissed her back?"

he shakes his head. "no, of course not! i was trying to tell her to stop, but she just grabbed my neck and kissed me."

amy and grayson walk out into the hallway now. 

"what's going on?" grayson asks, crossing his arms.

"ethan and kara just kissed." i blink away the tears, feeling anger replace the sadness. i can see the surprise on grayson and amy's faces.

"no, she kissed me." ethan takes a step towards me, grabbing my hand. "i would never do that to you, you know that," he pleads, staring intensely into my eyes.

i think for a second. i trust ethan. i don't believe he would do this to me. but how the hell does someone not realize they're about to be kissed?

not knowing what to believe, i take my hand out of his. "i just need time to think."

i try walking away, but he stops me again. "rylin, don't do this. don't walk away from me. you promised we'd talk to each other, always."

i can see his eyes getting glossy, like he was about to cry. realizing we were still in the hallway, i grab his hand and pull him to our room, closing the door behind me.

ethan sits on the bed, running his hands through his hair. he looks down at the ground, not meeting my eyes.

"why did it even happen in the first place, ethan?"

after a few seconds, he finally lifts his head again. his eyes are red and puffy, tears falling down his face.

i feel my body aching for him, my heart breaking at the sight. 

"i-i heard her crying, s-so i went to see what was wrong. and before i could realize what she was doing, she kissed me and wouldn't let me go." his voice comes out weak and small. "it was a mistake trying to help her. i'm so sorry, rylin. but i promise you, i didn't kiss her back."

i cross my arms. "then why did she say you did?"

"she probably heard you in the doorway and lied about it to get you upset." he sighs. "ry, you have to believe me."

i look into his eyes, glossy with tears. walking over, i grab his hand and lift his head to look me. 

"okay," i reply, squeezing his hand gently. "i believe you."

i can see the relief wash over him as soon as i say it. he pulls me into his lap, wrapping his arms around me tightly. i hug him back, letting his warmth spread through me.