part of me | e.d

thirty-eight

"emma?" ethan says, standing up and sitting luna on his arm.

it felt weird seeing her again. i mean, we were never that close since teagan was her person and amy was mine. but i still considered us friends back then. even after a year and a half, though, she looked pretty much the same. the only difference being that she wasn't following teagan around like usual.

"hey eth!" she runs across the room, wrapping her arms around ethan and hugging him tightly. ethan hesitates, but eventually hugs her back. even through his confusion, i can see he's happy to see her.

i immediately feel something flare up in my chest.

"what are you doing here?" he says into her shoulder.

"i've missed you!" she pulls away from ethan, then gives luna a kiss on the cheek. "and i've missed this little beauty. i couldn't miss her first birthday!"

ethan grins, watching emma play with luna. something about the way he looks at her bothers me. but i don't want to act like the jealous girlfriend. 

i trust ethan.

feeling awkward just sitting here and watching all this, i stand up and walk over to them. "hey emma."

she looks at me and her eyes go wide. "oh, h-hey rylin. i didn't know you were back in jersey."

"yeah, i'm here for the summer." i give her a small grin, staying next to ethan.

"hm. i didn't think you'd ever come back." 

i narrow my eyes at her. before i can say anything, ethan intervenes. "well, i'm glad you're both here. em, can i actually talk to rylin for a second?"

"yeah, of course. i'm just going to go say hi to grayson. talk later, e?" she looks at ethan.

he nods. "yeah, talk later."

she's about to walk out before she turns back to ethan. "actually, can i take luna? i've missed her so much and would love to spend time with her before we eat."

ethan nods and gives her luna, who's smiling cheesily. after she leaves, ethan walks back to the bed and sits down.

i just stare at him in confusion. "well?" my voice comes out harsher than i wanted.

"are you upset?" he furrows his eyebrows at me.

"n-no. just confused." i didn't want to create an issue out of nothing. especially when ethan and i just got back together. so i refused to act jealous.

"okay. um, at the end of senior year after you left, emma and i started hanging out more often."

i nod, encouraging him to go on.

"and then when kara had the baby and started going through her issues, emma was really there for me and helped take care of luna." he looks down at luna, playing with her hand. "but she got an internship for the summer and i told her she had to take it. she wasn't supposed to be back until august but i guess she wanted to surprise us."

as always, i let my mind think the worst. "so is that why you wanted me here this summer? to fill emma's spot?"

ethan's eyes widen right away. "no! of course not. rylin, i wanted you here because i've missed you and summer was the only time you'd be free to come back to jersey and talk to me."

i bite my lip, looking at him. "so nothing's ever happened between you guys?"

"no."

i look down at the ground, letting my doubts get the best of me. it bothers me how close they are, calling each other nicknames. and how close she is to luna.