Regret the reject now?

CHAPTER 31

CHAPTER 31: 

"Take deep breaths jade! Jade can you hear me? Just take deep breaths! Jade don't die on me! I love you jade please jade don't love me. I love you more than anything! I fell for you the real you not this damn mate thing. Jade I can't live without you! You promised. JADE NO!"

JADE'S POV: *4 hours earlier*

I can't choose between them. It's not possible they both make me happy, cause the butterflies in my stomach, they make me laugh, but they make me sad and cry. Both of them make me happy and they know that both of them have my heart and everyone sees that. Not only am I having to choose between them but I have to fight for other people's lives...more importantly my life. I'm not ready for this not even close to being prepared and you know what? I don't think I will ever be ready for this. 

Life is a roller coaster it has ups and downs but its up to you to enjoy it or not.

My roller coaster isn't that fun at the moment nut now thinking bout it was never enjoyable at all. My parents seem to hate me but....never show it? I was bullied when I first joined the purple swan pack but then they started to fake it. My mate rejected me because I wasn't up to his level or up to being a luna. My twin barely talked to me only when he needed me but never when I needed him. My life wasn't very shitty but....mostly lonely...if that makes any sense at all.

I don't even think I can even sleep for tomorrow morning. Once we get there shit is going to go down and apprently its not only my mates, guardians and I but other people too? We have the best wolf packs joining the battle, the powerful vampires, angels coming down to help heal the good ones, powerful hybrids are coming actually I think everyone is on there way to the battle field. Which is the big natural park by the mountains. We have some demons coming but that's because they miss killing bad people even though they are bad themselves. Mermaids and mermans are coming in the middle of the battle to drown some people. Good witches and wizards are joining up since the army killed some of their family coming here. The spirits are staying out of it sense they can't help at all unless to drag the souls to the big,black tunnel but that means they have to go in there and they don't want that.

 Evan tried cheering me up but all we ended up doing is me crying into his shirt while he was holding me. If anyone walked in it would look like we were a couple and I made it official since he was so close to me. He layed me down then laid by me while wrapping his arms around my waist with me crying into his chest. To me it was a position that I always wanted to do with my boyfriend will my mate. It didn't feel right it was like he was just my best friend and he came over to comfort me telling me that it would be okay. 

He lied.

We are now packing up and throwing our thing into small portals that would take them where we use to live before coming here. It was a big dare since anyone can get in it making their way at our "safe" place. My nerves were eating me alive, I drank 5 bottles of water in less than 30 minutes because my throat keeps getting dry the closer the time to leave comes closer and closer. Its only 9 in the morning. I couldn't get no rest last night since my thoughts kept consuming me which made it harder for me to even close my eyes. Nick came into my room complaining how he couldn't sleep alone because he has  feeling that it may be the last time he sees me. He wouldn't tell me what he meant but he was so certain of this little conclusion that he begged me to let him sleep with me. I agreed since he made it easier for me to sleep. He wanted to make love but I denied since when he said that the whole house shook which scared us both. Found out later Damon and Adam overheard which caused them to unleash their powers...they have't told me what they were. Ever since I left to my room and they did to not once have they came in barging in or knocking like the other guys. After Evan left it was like they were taking turning to see me and see if I were alright. The last person to come to my room was Nick but I hoped it would Adam or Damon. I faked a smile and let him in my bed.