US

Chapter 5

We got to the gate libaray and sat opposite eachother. I connected my phone to the WiFi and immediately went on the Newlook website so I can find a suitable jacket as the ones I see in shops are not the jackets I want.

I find a navy blue bumper jacket which was £50.00. There was no way I would be able to get it. My mum would never pay that amount for a jacket especially a bumper jacket. You see the thing about my mum is that she is all about the elegancy. She likes it best when me and my sister wear dresses, skirts and neat shoes. She hates it when we wear trainers and bumper jackets. "I just want you two to look very elegant." She would always say when we refuse to abide by her dress code.

I signed as I moved on to another jacket when I felt a kick on my leg. I looked up at Jason who was looking very tired and stressed out.
"How long are you here for Callar? "

"Until my sister messages me and says she home. But don't worry she would be home soon." He nods and puts his earphones back on. Today has been a very strange day and I thought Lily going mute was weird. Jason coming to my house is weird! Then that's when I remember the questions I had set to ask him in my head.

I kicked Jason which automatically made him take his ear phones out quickly before giving me a glare.
"That actually hurt!"
"I am sorry."
"What do you want?"
"How did you get my address?"
"Huh?"
"How did you get my address?" He looks down at his phone with a blank look on his face and then he looks back at me with a straight face. "I have my ways. This makes me frown.

"I guess you are not the worst in school but your still horrible to me. You bully me and I am worried because we don't talk and then you find out where I live."
My voice cracks a little and I promise you guys it wasn't because I was about to cry.

OK it was.

I look down at my hands while trying to form the words in my head but before I can continue I hear Jason mumble the two words I never thought would come out of his mouth.

"I'm sorry." I stared at him as if he had grown two heads. "Wait...what?"
"I said I am sorry. I shouldn't have treated you horribly or made you feel horrible about yourself ."

"That's ok." I said quietly. "That doesn't answer my question though."
"I know." He pauses while watching a small child picking up a book and running to her guardian. "I promise Callar all your questions will be answered soon. Maybe not today, tomorrow, this week, next week, this month-"
"Yes I get it!' I interrupt while he smiled softly at me.
"I am glad you do" We remain in silence while I am searching up more jackets. My phone suddenly vibrated. It was a notification from Snapchat. Some users I didn't have on Snapchat had left me messages which was probably about my story which consists of Jason dancing and my dodgy laughing in the background.
I opened the first message from bellajfjdhdhdj356🌹 which read:

"Wow never knew Jason would kill his status like that. I mean him being on your story is suicide you are aware of that callacow."

Ouch. That actually hurt. I don't know if it was because the person was saying that I am killing Jason status or because the individual just put the word cow in my name and it actually fitted well. I am going to say that both contributed to the pain. I know I shouldn't have but I opened the second message which was below this one and it read:

"Hey you know how in class we say stuff like jumping of a bridge would mean no school for life. Well if you did it this would mean we would be able to save Jasons status and save our eyesight from your ugly image."

That's when I noticed that 65 people had seen my story and I only had 19 people on Snapchat and they were close friends and family. For the first time I felt so so empty and hopeless. The feeling of sadness started to sink in and I felt like I was going to cry and I didn't need that. Especially when Jason is here. I got up from my seat being careful not to make a sound as some old people were sitting around and reading.
I rushed to the toilet, locked the cubicle and cried. I haven't cried this hard since my dad died and I started to get worried because the last timeI cried this hard I started struggling to breath and ended up in the hospital which made my mum and sister very worried.

Calm down Callar. You have been through worse. I rolled my eyes at the voice in my head eventhough it's true. What happened last year is nothing compared to today. I just sometimes wish I was different and that I wasn't always the target. I am so tired of this routine of being bullied and going toilet to cry my eyes out.
I wished I was accepted.
I wish I was pretty.
I wish my dad hadn't of died.
I wish I was happier.
I cried harder knowing that some of these wishes would probably never happen. I sat still allowing myself to calm down a bit. If I didn't stop crying not only would my eyes be red but my nose would be too. Jason would then realise I am sad.

He can't know that.

I dry my eyes with my hands not caring to much about using a tissue as I wasn't wearing make up or anything. I walked back to Jason to see him sitting on the table with his backpack in his lap and my bag next to him.
"Is your sister home?"
I looked at my phone and saw that she had sent a message saying she is home and would like to have a word with me. That didn't sound good.
"Yh she is." I said while looking at my bag. Jason followed where I was looking before grabbing my bag and giving it to me. "Thank you Jason for staying with me."
"Should I walk you home?" OK today must be April fools day and I must be the biggest idiot this year.

"No." I stated before walking quickly. I could hear his steps behind even when outside. "Why the sudden change?" I carried on walking and responded without looking back. "Go home Jason!" He carries on following me then we get to the bush area where he peed and I turned around to face him. "I mean it Jason! Go home and leave me alone." With that said I turn around and run home.

When I get to the door step my sister immediately opens the door without me knocking. "Where have you been?"
"I went library."
"Well come take a look at what you have done." Oh great she found out about the burnt food. I groan knowing that she is going to give me a lecture which I am in no good mood for. She walks us to the dinning room and in the dinning room is a white cat. It's my neighbours cat but how did it get here. Then I remembered.

I forgot to close the garden door and the neighbours probably opened the fence door when me and Jason had left thinking that we may need to use it when coming back through their house. If Jason had seen the door on time he wouldn't have climbed over and nearly killed himself. I always knew there was was a door I just have always like climbing and jumping over fences.

I looked at my sister who was waiting for an explanation. "Fine! I invited Jason over and he was drunk and took of his shirt. He was being stupid and we heard you and literally jumped over the fence so you wouldn't see us." She had her mouth wide open in shock. "So that's what you do. You invite shirtless guys and-"
"I don't! "
"Shut up and get rid of this cat or else."
"I am scared of cats."
"I don't care!" And with that my sister left leaving me and the cat alone together.

Today has been just great.