dear Ashton,
my mom's funeral is tomorrow and I'm not looking forward to it. I don't want to say goodbye to another person I love. ...
your mom is taking it really badly. she couldn't stop crying and screaming. it was horrible to watch. I felt her pain, the pain of losing two important people...and its crazy too think that...I was In love with one of them.
...
I don't get it, Ashton.
why does god take away people you love? and flip your whole world upside down.
like, he's doing it on purpose... just to see you suffer... just to see you break everyday.. just to see you drown in your own sadness...just waiting until the day you finally give up.
I just don't get it.
...
what did I do to deserve this? ... what made god take away you and my mother away from me? what did I do?
-
the fridge is empty, well it has been empty for quite awhile Now. I find it stupid, just to walk to the grocery store and buy food...when really, I'll just buy weed or drugs or some fucking shit.
my stomach is aching for food...
my head is pounding...
my legs are weak..
my arms are itchy as fuck...
my eyes are red...
I just feel really bad right now. I just need to sleep and forget about everything for awhile. but that's the problem... I can't sleep.. I can't forget.
its bothering me so much.
its bothering me so much that I can't sleep and it's giving me nightmares.
its fucking me up...
-
You lost, a part of your existence
In the war, against yourself.
-luke
YOU ARE READING
99 days without you >> lashton AU
Fanfiction❝Ash, Im confused, I thought we were happy. I thought we were doing okay. I thought we went through that…but I was wrong. I was so wrong.❞ Where Luke hemmings writes to his dead boyfriend, hoping he'd write back. All rights reserved || © YayerNayer...
