Divorced ✔ Jenzie

29. "I know what's best for you."

A/N: I feel like I haven't updated a while, even though I updated last saturday...

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MACKENZIE'S POV:

Annie pulled me to behind a tree, far from Johnny so he can't hear. She stood there, not necessarily glaring at me, it was more of a sympathetic look.

I hugged my body, the cold wind hitting me. I was so lost in thought and caught up with Johnny, that I didn't pay any attention to the weather whatsoever. I guess love can do that to you.

He's on my mind constantly. I've honestly tried to get him out, but nothing works. You love who you love, and you can't change that. 

Annie crossed her arms, leaning against the tree. "Tell me, what was that?"

I shrugged, looking anywhere else but Annie. I felt ashamed. I don't regret kissing him, I just regret Annie witnessing it. I don't want people to think less of me, just because I'm playing around with my ex-husband.

Annie motioned to Johnny, who couldn't see nor hear us. He was too far away, but there was a gap in between the tree bushes, allowing us to get a somewhat clear view of him. He was on his phone, bored out of his mind. I could tell he was still taken back from that little moment we had, he couldn't stop smiling– which couldn't make me stop smiling.

I turned my gaze back to Annie. "What's wrong with me kissing him? It's really none of your business what I do with him. It doesn't affect you in any way, why do you care?"

I don't know where I got all this confidence from. But I got this sudden urge to defend Johnny, like my life depended on it.

Annie's glare dropped, and she let her emotions finally show. Her face converted to a sympathetic look. She uncrossed her arms, pouring her whole heart out. "Mackenzie, it does affect me. You're my best friend, I care so much about you. I've known you for so long, I don't want you to get hurt again because of him." She once again motioned with her hands to Johnny, who was currently admiring the view, similar to what I did before he came and interrupted my little day. "He did something unforgivable, don't you understand?"

"Forgiving him is possible. If I really try, and if I really want to be with him again, I can try." I don't even know why I'm defending Johnny and I's relationship at this point. I'm going insane. Johnny did something horrible, I know that. Words just poured out of my mouth, as I had to fill the dots with what those words really mean.

Forgiving him is possible. I know it is. But I don't have to do it if I don't want to. The thing is, I don't know if I do want to or not. Do I even want to be with him again? It's not like I can trust him again, and a relationship is built off of trust. There won't be any trust, what's the point in even being together?

Annie sighed. "I'm not telling you you can't forgive him, because you can. You can be friends. Actually, it's best to be friends, because that would mean the world to Lauren. But being in a relationship with him again is too much, you're asking yourself to do too much." I was on a verge of bursting into tears, just thinking of my situation makes me do that. My eyes were most likely red, but I was able to keep my tears in. This isn't the time to cry. "You're over-thinking this, Kenz. I love you and I know what's best for you."

"Do you really?" I scoffed. She saw my state, and was honestly desperate to try and make me feel better.

"Yes, I do know what's best for you. Maybe not all the time, but I know I'm right about this situation. Johnny cheated once, how do you know he won't do it again?" Annie muttered, her voice loud.

"I don't!" I screamed. Our voices were echoing around the place. Johnny still wouldn't be able to make out what we were saying, but he'd get the hint that we're screaming at each other.