My Suck Life

Surprise

I wake up today and I'm feeling terrible, I don't know why, must be just a fluid. I stood up and I feel a little dizzy but I don't care.

I get ready and go to school. I'm still feeling weak, but this not going to ruin the day, today is Noah's first day back!!! I go his locker and wait him there, here he is!!

"NOAH!!!" I said and hug him tight and he groan in pain "Oh my God, I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay." He said giggling.

"I've missed you!!" I said and he giggle.

"We talked yesterday, we Face Time for two hours when you left Finn's house." He said and we laugh.

"I know, but I've missed you." I said smiling.

"I've missed you too." He said.

We keep talking and then went to class.

--After class--

School is over and now is time for the surprise, I'm here at my locker with Noah when I see Finn with tombs up from the choir room.

"Can you come with me to the choir room? It's really quick, I just have to take something with Finn." I said.

"Sure." He said.

We walk in the choir room and everyone yelled "WELCOME BACK PUCK!!!" and he smiled surprised.

"Guys, thanks!" He said smiling hugging everyone. 

"Thanks for organizing everything here." I said looking up to Finn and he give me half-smile.

"It was my pleasure." He said smirking and then I feel dizzy again.

"Babe are you okay?" He asked me worried.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I have to make a call, I'll be right back." I said kissing his cheek and leave the choir room.

I disk Dr.Stevens number, I hope she answer the phone. She always send me texts asking how I am, she's very nice.

--Call--

"Dr.Stevens here." She said, answering the phone.

"Izzie? It's Rachel, am I interrupting something?" I said nervous.

"Hi Rach, you're okay? You're not interrupting." She said calmly.

"I don't know if I'm okay, for the past few days I'm feeling weird." I said.

"Tell me more." She said and I can notice that she's worried.

"I'm feeling more tired and dizzy." I said.

"You should come tomorrow for make some test, Rach you really have to take care of yourself or you have to stay in the hospital waiting for your transplant." She said serious.

"I don't want to stay there!" I said nervous.

"So, come tomorrow and we will make tests okay? Don't worry." She said.

"Thanks Izzie, see ya tomorrow." I said still nervous.

"See ya tomorrow." She said and hung up the phone.

--End of the call--

I don't want to stay in the hospital waiting for a heart that I know that will never come! People wait for years for an organ.

I start to walk in circles, I hope the test don't show that my heart is worst, I don't have my dads here for me anymore. What if I get worst? How about school? It's almost summer! I don't want my senior summer in a hospital bed, it's lonely there. I know I have Finn and Noah but, Finn always travel with his family at summer and Noah is always working cleaning pools. 

I used to be bullied, slushied on the face everyday, called names, I used to have panic attacks every time and my dads were never home. Now that I finally have friends and a boyfriend, life want to screw me once more, my dads died and my heart is SUCKS! 

"Babe, are you okay?" I look up and see Finn looking at me with a worried face. "You are out there for like 30 minutes and is walking in circles, I know you do that when you are nervous with something." 

"I was just talking with my dads lawyer, bullshit about the company." I said.

"Oh." He said and I can see he's not buying it. "Are you coming?" He asked.

"In a few minutes." I said and he walk in the choir room again.

I can see he noticed that I'm lying to him, I really want to tell him the truth, really really really want, but I just don't want to give him something to worry about. I feel bad for him though, I just  wish he doesn't start to imagine crazy things.

Finn's POV

I can see that Rachel is lying, I don't know why. She had a worried look on her face and was walking in circles and she only do that when something is bothering her. I thought we were fine, so why she's lying to me?

Rachel's POV

I hate lie to him, to the man I love. I hate have to keep this in secret from him, I just have no idea how to tell!! I just really hope that he forget about this and don't think any crap, I just love him so much and I know that probably make him very sad and I just want to see him happy.

I walk in the choir room again and Finn come to talk with me.

"Can I talk to you?" Finn asked me.

"Sure." I said and we left the room.

"Why are you lying to me?" He asked.

"What?" I asked him.

"Why you lied to me earlier? About your phone call." He said and I sighed.

"It was nothing, seriously. I'm sorry I lied earlier." I said.

"But why did you lied?" He asked and I stare the floor.

"I freaked out! I'm lost, I don't know what to do, I'm just not ready to talk about this now, okay?" I said with teary eyes still staring at the floor.

"It's okay, whenever you ready, I'm here for you." He said hugging me and I hug him back "But please, do not lie to me ever again, I was freaking out." He said and I giggle.

"I love you." I said.

"I love you too." He said and we kissed passionately.