Ashes in the Dusk [CBS#4]

Pʀᴏʟᴏɢᴜᴇ

🌾

Rich kids worry less about how their future turns out to be for their parents have already paved the way to a comfortable and luxurious type of life for them.

That was what I often heard from other people. I needed not to fret about how tomorrow would be like because everything was already polished for me--house, workplace, and agricultural businesses. As the youngest in our lineage, the larger portion of our riches would absolutely be rendered to me.

Born with a silver spoon in my mouth, life, for me, had always been easy. Luxurious stuffs always waited for me whether I received such achievements or not.

"Whether you make it to the top in the honors' list or not, I'd still buy you a brand new car." Kuya Roald once assured me way back in my senior high school days.

Halos lahat ng ginagawa ko, pinapadali nila sa akin. That was why presents meant nothing to me anymore. Whatever it would be, it would no longer send me an overwhelmed feeling. Kahit bumagsak man ako o hindi, palagi akong may natatanggap na regalo.

Rewards should've reinforced me to thrive harder, but no. They never incentivized me at all.

I had no issues with money and academics. Wala rin akong problema sa aking tinitirhan. Kailanman hindi ako nahirapang mag-isip kung paano ako makakasakay pauwi dahil maraming sasakyan sa bahay. I never had a dream place to visit nor dream stuffs to have. I tended to acquire them in an instant, without having myself saved some money from my allowance.

Sinuman sa mga pinsan ko ang hingan ko, bibigyan ako. Hindi man ako manghingi, bibigyan pa rin ako. Tumanggi man ako, my debit card na naman ako sa cabinet ko. Ate Ame had always put a cash in my wallet since swiping cards in whichever cashier was not yet trendy in our province. I only got to use my cards during my vacations in urban or abroad.

My fingers were never used to chores. I didn't engage myself much in physical pursuits. In our farms, I only did the lighter works. Masyadong pinapadali sa akin ang lahat. Bagay na habang tumatagal, hindi ko na nagugustuhan.

It would not be all the time that my family were present. Our surnames may not constantly top in agricultural sector. Time may come that it would be harder to grow some crops. Rains or storms might come killing our plants. Our could be broken machineries. Plagues could kill our animals. Our farmlands may be sold or pawned to other rich investors or businessmen.

Hindi lahat ng oras nasa tuktok kami.

We were at the peak and I laid on the bed coated by golds. Yet, if poverty came to visit us, I'd suffer the lowest base of greatest difficulty.

My cousins had been dexterous in agriculture. They knew how many weeks would it take before the corns and other crops grew, they knew how to fix the broken machineries, and they knew how to create good solutions for each arising problem. Kung maghihirap man kami, kahit saan sila mapadpad, mabubuhay sila.

But an spoiled freak like me would never survive because I only knew less. My experiences lacked.

"Papá, gusto kong matutong magpatakbo ng sakahan." bungad ko sa aking ama ilang buwan na simula nang nag-graduate ako.

Hindi na umaliwalas ang mukha ni Papá. Every Sellozzo was destined to embrace the agricultural business right after schooling. I was raised loving the idea of growing crops, taking good care of the pastures, and everything that could be seen in our farm.