Ashes in the Dusk [CBS#4]

Chapter 2

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A single year passed since Mommy left me. The pain was still raw and it felt like the tragedy just happened yesterday. I always slept in her room and tugged her soft pillows under my chest. I still couldn't believe how her sweet scent lingered on the fabric despite the wide time interval since her death.

For me, the radiance of the sun never brightened up in each day that rolled by. Everything was meaningless, colorless, and dull. The infrequency of Daddy's visit in our house gave me the freedom. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala na kahit sa mga panahong 'to, sakahan pa rin ang inuuna niya.

Seriously, he really never thought of giving his daughter a company who's probably still lurking under the shadow of a dark room while grieving for her mother's death. He never really cared about me! Kung nagkataon lang na hindi mapapagkatiwalaan ang mga kasambahay namin, hindi niya mamamalayang hinamak na ang kanyang anak!

He thought that his frequent calls were enough to ensure my safety! Puwes, nagkakamali siya.

Simula nang nawala si Mommy, tinanggap ko nang hindi talaga ako minahal ni Daddy. Kaya naman, naisip kong kung hindi ko makukuha ang pagmamahal galing sa tunay na pamilya, siguro makukuha ko iyon sa aking mga kaibigan.

"Syntia! May plano kami nina Vick. Mamayang alas tres ng hapon, hindi tayo papasok sa pangatlong subject. Pupunta tayo sa resort nila!" nakangising untag sa akin ni Dana, ang una kong kaibigan simula pagkatuntong ko ng Senior High School.

My last friend, Lyndon, way back in junior high, pursued his studies in another university, very far from my current school. We barely saw each other because of that. Isang beses sa dalawang buwan lang kami magkita kung hindi masikip ang kanyang schedule.

"Sure," balewala kong sagot at ngumisi.

The next subject would be very boring for sure. Though life had long been really dull for me when Mommy left me a year ago. Nakita ko na ang ibang kaibigan na madalas kong kasama sa kabalastugan. Simpleng titigan lang sa mata, nagkakaintindihan na kami.

"Pagkatapos ng attendance, saka tayo pupuslit." bulong sa'kin ni Gracie, isa pang kaibigan.

Ditching classes did not scare me out anymore. We had been doing this for months now. Kung minsan, nasa bars kami at kahit menor-de-edad, nagagawa pa rin naming pumasok. Thanks to our freakin' wealthy asshole friend, Pykes! Sometimes, we'd go to other places to grab alcoholic drinks for fun. Kung saan-saan kami napupunta kung gugustuhin namin, at ilang beses na rin kaming ipinatawag sa Guidance Office.

"Hey, make sure to jot down all the significant information from the discussion, alright? I will have your notes photocopied tomorrow." pananakot ko sa isang geek na kaklase na agarang napayuko at tumango-tango.

Ito ang pinaka paborito kong pag-trip-an dito sa school. I enjoyed the look on his face each time I closed our distance. It was not beyond everyone else in this classroom that our nerdy classmate had a huge crush on me. Taking advantage of his feelings for me was fun.

Tuwing exam, hindi delikado ang mga scores ko dahil nariyan ang baduy kong prince charming para sagipin ako. He could have been a perfect suitor in fairytales. Unfortunately, I was not the destined princess for him.

"Uh, S-Syntia, pupuslit ulit kayo?" utal-utal pang tanong nito sa likuran ko.

I leaned against the chair and tilted my head a bit to get a glimpse of him. The large frame of his glasses almost covered a huge part of his face.

"Yes, Yuki." I replied lazily while fiddling my feet under the desk, almost getting bored.

What's taking Miss Wasilla long?