Colour Storms: Shawn Mendes ✔️

47

"just a character in my book"
Bella Croft
Christmas Day

Time is known to heal wounds. Maybe five days is too short but isn't a year too long?

Locked up all my pain, sadness and heartbreak. It couldn't have been washed away with the heaviest rain. Yet I wished it upon no one.

My flowers had died. Petals shrivelled up into ugly, crumpled pieces of nothing. The blossom tree had died, the pink petals had fallen, branches covered with pure snow, it might've seemed idyllic but to me the tree had lost all meaning.

But for my family I forgot this feeling and continued like he was just boy, just a character in my book, just someone who made me feel loved, cared for, safe, like I could take on anything, made me reveal a side of myself that was touched by only him-

Stop Bella! I told myself. How could I be thinking of him when he was probably didn't waste a thought on me.

"Bella! Come down!" Ryder yells. I'm ripped from my thoughts and my body is carried down the stairs. I stop for a second.

Stop. Breathe. Smile. It's all okay.

"Are you ready to see what I got you!" I smile walking into to see dad and Ryder in matching Christmas pyjamas, I had the same ones on but in red.

"Merry Christmas honey" dad hugs me. "Merry Christmas" I kiss his temple.

We sit down with our mugs of hot chocolate, Christmas themed cookie, we sat around the grand tree and before we open our gifts.

I had gotten Ryder a bike, as promised. For dad was a small model of the manor, he was an architect after all and this made his day. Dad gave Ryder a few games for his new PS4.

"That ones yours" dad points. I pick up the box placing it front of me. I tear up the wrapping and chuckle. "Seriously dad" I ask.

"For France, it's nothing" he shakes his head. It was a Louis Vuitton luggage set. "Thank you" I give him a hug. "And one more thing, I bumped you up to first class. The plane journey is roughly eight hours" he tells me.

"You seriously didn't have to do this" I squeal wrapping my arms around him. "We're gonna miss you Bella" he sniffles. "Daddy don't cry, you guys are coming to visit remember" I tell him.

He nods wiping his tears. "Now, lets clean this up and get ready for dinner" he smiles. For dinner all the close staffs and family were going to be here. Not my family, we weren't close but Miss Porter, Olly and Frankie's family were all invited later on.

"Bella there's someone at the door" Ryder tells me. "Oh I'll get it" I nod. I stand up going to the door.

"Merry Christmas" Jon smiles, behind him stood the boys. "Merry Christmas" I smile. I stand there for a second confused.

"Sorry, come in" I move out the way. "Merry Christmas Bella" Matt hugs me tightly. "We wanted to see you plus we came with gifts"

"Place looks great" Brian hugs me. "We dragged him along" he whispers. I nod moving back then hug Jon. I glanced at Shawn and he looked... he looked fine.

"Bella who is it?" Dad walk over. "Merry Christmas Mr Croft" Jon smiles.

"You" dad points to Shawn. "What makes you think you can come here" he walks over and grabs Shawn by his coat.

"Dad" I place my hand on his shoulder. "Stop it" I shake my head. He nods pulling back. "I'll call security if you want" dad tells me.

I looked up at Shawn and he sent me a look that said he didn't care. "It's okay"

"Shout me if you need anything" I nod then he walks away. "Erm lets go sit" the boys follow me to the living room where Ryder sat playing with his Wii switch.

"Brian!" Ryder yells running over to him. "Merry Christmas Ryder" Brian chuckles picking him up. The rest of them sit down. I sit on the floor with Brian and Ryder, I was afraid to even look at him.

Ryder goes along saying hi to Matt and Jon then when he got to Shawn he stopped. "You made Bella cry" Ryder says.

My heart clenched. "Ryder come here" I tug his arm back. "Show me the new game dad got you" I try to just ignore what happened but it was hard when the boys were looking between each other and at me with sadness.

"We all got you something" Jon says. "You didn't have to" I shake my head. "It was nothing, give it to her Brian" Matt tells Brian.

Brian hands me a box wrapped neatly. I read the card in top of it.

Merry Christmas
-love the boys, Brian, Matt and ur fave Jon

I opened it up seeing small replica of my white bike. "It's like a jewellery stand" Brian explains pointing to where I could put everything.

"Thank you, I love it" I give Brian a hug since he was the closest. "Shawn give your gift" Matt tells him.

"I got you all something too" I say before he could speak. I honestly didn't want anything off him.

"Here" I give the envelope to Brian.

"To my favourite guys, love Bells" Brian reads out loud. He opens it up. "What is it? Matt asks.

"Tickets to see travis Scott" Brian chuckles in happiness. He pulls me into a hug. "Woah that's sick" Jon exclaims. "They're box tickets" I explain.

"Holy shit, thanks Bella" Brian hugs me again. "No problem. I just remembered when I'd stay over you guys would play the album over and over again" I shrug.

"Shawn give your gift" Matt tells him. "I don't want anything from you" I say looking down at my hands. "Bella-"

"I don't have anything for him so it's only fair" I cut Brian off. He nods then they all leave the subject alone.

"Why are you here?" I blurt out looking up at Shawn. "They forced me to come" he shrugs.

"But you didn't have to listen. You don't listen to me, why did you come?" I ask again but I get no reply. My eyes begin watering and I hated myself for being so weak.

"Tell me" I beg. I go over to him placing my hands over his, a feeling I missed so much. He just shook his head and moved his hands.

"You ruined my Christmas by being here so leave" I wipe my cheeks sniffling as I move back.

"Why are you still sat here? I don't want you here, you don't even want to be here" I scoff. "You don't love me" I cry. "And that's so unfair, why would you come here? Are you purposely doing this to hurt me?" I ask.

Pure silence.

"Leave or I'll- I'll..." his eyes meet mine and I wished he would show me some emotion but there was nothing.

"Just go" I get up sitting back near the tree.

He left without saying a word. The boys stayed another ten minutes then left me.

Ryder cuddled into my side comforting me as best he could.

-
Updated again because you guys deserve it.
I want them together again. Help
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