My Disney Prince

37. I want...

"Roman?" I nudged him slightly and I heard him groan as he woke up. He's been sleeping in here a lot with me but... He always seems to be having these nightmares. "You were crying out in your sleep again."

"I'm sorry." I heard him whimper slightly as he stretched out and I frowned. If sleeping here is hurting him, he should sleep in his bed. It's a lot more comfortable than this one. "How did you sleep?"

"Sleep? What's that?" I laughed at my own joke and felt him brush my hair back. "I slept fine, Roman. I'm just... It's loud. Logan and Patton are fighting again. I just know it. There's this person... I can't see. He smells like coffee and caramel... Reminds me too much of Janus" I pushed myself into him and I felt him tense up. "I don't like it here. I don't like it stuck in this room all the time."

"I know, hun... Just give me some more time ok? I want to make sure you'll be ok." I started shaking. I couldn't help it. I'm in the dark. Figuratively and literally... I felt him place his forehead on mine and I tensed up. Suddenly there was this light and I froze. I looked up to see him smiling. I actually could see him. I felt the tears spill and I my heart weld up. 

"Roman..." He jumped back and suddenly everything was dark again. Yeah, it hurt me but... I saw him. I actually saw him. I don't care how short a time it was. I could see his smile.

"What? What happened?" I reached out and he took my hand, giving me this concerned look. "What's wrong?"

"For a second there... I could see you." He jumped up and I fell forward. "Roman?" I heard the door slam and I just sat there confused. "ROMAN?!"

I should've kept my mouth shut. I should've to myself. I could feel Roman's sadness. I could feel his anger and it killed me. I've been laying here forgot know's how long. It just replaying in my mind. I told him... and he left. Just like that. H didn't even say anything. I yelled out and nothing. Nothing...

I heard the door close and I popped my head up an frowned. I heard someone sigh and I looked away. I heard as he walked over and collapsed on the bed beside me. I could feel the frustration rolling off of him. 

"Roman?" I couldn't get the thoughts out of my head. The voices telling me I fucked up."Did I upset you?"

"What do you mean?" I laid back and held my hand up frowning. Nothing... nothing but black. I can't see anything. Yet at that moment I could see him. It was like... I don't know.

"When I told you I could see you for a second... You ran off. I... I could feel you were upset. Sad... Was it me?" He laid back with me and held me close. I just couldn't... I glanced towards him and shook my head. The voices only ever stop with him near but... I just can't forget what they say.

"Of course not. I was sad... I was sad because it didn't last. That I... That I couldn't just give your sight back to you." Wait... Was that really why he was so upset. He can't do anything. I know what happened to me. It was Jan... He cursed me. Just like Lydia. I'm never going to get my sight back... I was lucky just to see him that one last time. I don't even know how that happened.

"Roman... You can't..." He gripped my hand tight and I stopped, moving my head towards his. I felt him kiss my forehead and I pushed myself farther into him.

"We'll go out together soon. Ok? Just us alone together. Where ever you want to go." I pulled away slightly and frown. I thought about it. Where I would want to go... Where I want to take him... "What?"

"I want to go home." My voice cracked and I looked away. "I want us to back home."

"Hun... I don't think going back to the cave is a good..." I shook my head and moved in closer.

"I didn't mean the cave." I felt him hold me tighter and I smiled. I want to take him back to my home. If he's going to choose me. He has to know what he's choosing... plus... "Thomas... I have... I have to go home."

"Thomas?" I nodded and smiled softly.

"He's my younger brother. He died when he was small... It's... It's his birthday." I could feel the tears well up again and I tried to wipe them away.

"Why don't you tell me about him?" I just looked up at him. I felt his hand touch my face and I flinched unintentionally. I hated not being able to see anything. It's scary and all too familiar. "I would like to know more about your brother."

"There really isn't much to say. He was so small... so young." I pulled away and hugged my knees as I just stared at nothing. "He was 6 when he died."

"How if you don't mind..."My eyes went wide as the memories played through my mind. He died... I wasn't... I wasn't there. They locked me up and I could be there for him. That was all he wanted. He didn't want to be alone. "... nevermind. You don't..."

"Death's Touch... He... He was born with it. People said he was never meant to live. That death marked him before birth, but he was a fighter. He was so strong, even when those black veins..." I stopped and He tensed up. I could feel his shock and anger. I never told him... I told him I knew what his father had.

"Black veins? Like... Like what..." I nodded and looked away.

"Like what your father had. My brother had it too. So did an old friend of mine." I hugged myself tighter and smiled widely. I didn't want him to see the pain. Even though I'm sure he could feel it. " The good thing is that even with all that pain, Thomas never let it stop him. He was active as much as he could. He was weak in physical strength but his will was strong. He had this smile that lit up the world and he was always telling jokes. He was the only good thing I had back then."

"Virgil... you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." I shook my head again and leaned into him.

"I trust you. I... I love you." I need to know that... you'll love me too. Not this perfect version that I fear you think I am. I want someone you'll look at me knowing what I was... the whole truth and... still look at me with love in their eyes. Like Jan... before I found out it was all just one big lie.

I want you... But I want the truth more.