Chapter Thirty Five: Walkie-Talkies

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I tread through the fucking forest. I'm exhausted, starving, and thirsty as hell. 'Earl you dumbass, didn't even pack a sleeping bag or anything of use besides nasty as shit alcohol. I'm so glad I stabbed you, you shit ball.' I think to myself mentally cursing the fucker.

These people must be some boogeyman shit because I've been walking through here for hours and have yet to see any of these 'Walkie Talkie' people. Hell I haven't seen any signs of life, or death for that fucking matter, at all. Just when I'm about to throw in the damn towel and head back to Kendall I hear something in the bushes.

"Come out from wherever you're hiding, and let's look at each other so you can see my big fucking knife and I can see... well whatever the fuck you have. Let's see how fucking interesting this is going to be." I taunt trying to lure whoever or whatever out. Suddenly, like ten fuckers appear, at first they just look like the dead but nope. It's hard to tell but I can definitely see mouths outlined under their masks. These are for sure the shit heads Kendall was talking about.

"Oh okay. You have knives too. That's cool." I say, I'm not gonna lie. These people have me scared shitless. I mean holy fuck. No wonder Kendall was scared. I mean I'm a grown ass man and I still feel like I may need to change my damn trousers at the sight of these bastards.

"Wow you guys are scary as fuck. If it were a little darker and I couldn't see your fucking people mouths through the skin masks, I'd never be able to tell you apart from the dead ones. Crazy. Like how do you guys keep from stabbing each other? Or shit... do you people just push a fucking dude in the bushes and say 'oh he was already dead.' And move on? Be honest that's happened at least once, right? Be honest. Don't fucking fuck with me."

"You know who we are?" One asks

Shit. Think fast. They have to think I'm alone.

"I have eyes so, fuck yes. I know what you are. People wearing skin suits to mask themselves from the dead. Duh. Or is this like a fucking Looney Tunes thing and there's another zipper under the human skin and you all are secretly dogs or some shit. You guys like living Russian Nestle Dolls?"

"Why did you come here?" The deceptive fucker asks.

"You ask that like this burnt out street is something fucking special. I came here to get there. Do I have any fucking clue where there is? Hell to the fuck no. I'm just trying to survive in a world filled with the dead. This skin thing works? I can get into that." I lie through my fucking teeth. But they do look pretty badass.

"So you weren't sent here?" A voice behind me asks. I nearly fucking jump but held my composure.

"Huh? Sent?" I ask turning around coming face to face with the fucking monster of fucking Frankenstein. I mean my fucking goodness. I'm pretty tall, but this fucker is ginormous. At least nearly seven foot tall. I mean he can't be human.

"Holy Shit! You're a scary fuck aren't you? Jesus, Shit. You're a mean looking motherfucker." I notice he is only wearing the top half of the skin mask revealing his mouth. "You some kind of rebel? Won't wear the full skin suit? Just a skin... helmet? You just hang out behind the others saying 'pay no attention to me.' Hoping the dead won't notice your mouth and chin? I'm sure it gets hot as balls in a full skin suit. I might go for your modified version. Or can they just not find enough skin to cover your giant fucking ass? You got a name big guy?"

"We do not have names. I am called beta." The freak show speaks. I can't help but to almost laugh. What disappointment. I also can't help but to laugh at the fact Kendall wanted to face this all alone. I mean her coming face to face with this guy? He could literally step on her. I'm not saying she's weak. She's not. But my shit.

"That's a fucking name. A stupid one... but I guess that shit still counts."

"You are not amusing. You are too loud. This is not a world for the loud anymore. You need to be silenced."

"Is that a fucking threat? I'm not a fucking idiot. I can count, and I count ten of you. The rest are undead fucks. And while I appreciate you holding those stupid fucks at bay, I'd bet my most handsomest nut only two of you can actually fucking fight. I'm not going to win a full blown fight, especially with you frowny mctwoknives jumping in. But I'm God damn motherfucking sure as fucking fuck that I'll kill at least three of you nasty fucking piss bowls before you even touch me. Maybe I only get a good stab in on a few of you, you die later."

There's a moment of silence, and this fucking asshole has the audacity to smile. "You think so?" He asks with a stupid ass grin. Alexandria thought I was the big bad fucking wolf? Shit. Wait til they get a look at this guy. I don't know which beanstalk he fell from but I'm about to send him back in a God damn minute.

"I think you think so... I think you fucking think so enough to not have to fight me if you don't need to. And just a little fucking newsflash, you don't fucking have to. I'm a joiner, you guys have a pledge? I'll pledge all fucking day. I've been alone for too fucking long and I'm ready to shack up. Well not shack up, shack up. Although for all I know you're all fuckable under there. The point being... fucking, no fucking... whatever. I just want a safe place to sleep tonight.

They pause for a moment.

"Take his knife and bring him." Big bird fucking demands.

"You act all tough. But you're a real fucking softy aren't ya? Beta Mctwoknives. So soft you gotta thumb that shit in. Am I right? Are you a thumber? Get it, anyone?" I joke before following them. Fuck yeah, I'm in. Now to make a damn plan.

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