Chapter 11

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It's Her

Hero's POV
Just when you think that your life can't get any better, it shoots you with a new ball. You try to play it well but that's not all. You have to play it not the way you want but the way you are wanted to. I am not complaining honestly. Everything that I have achieved till now is more than a dream to me but somewhere down the line, I started feeling that maybe this is not what I thought it would be. Keeping up with my family's legacy, I am giving a shot to this field of acting to see where it takes me.
I wish I could be as brave as Nirvana. After her parent's died, she started living with her aunt until she realized that they won't support her with her career choice. She left them, studied hard for scholarship, came to New York and now she is here. I wish I was as strong as her in believing in my dreams. I wish I had her before, to push me to chase my dreams. But now I am here and there is no turning back. Well I should be thankful that I got this project, otherwise I would have never come across her.
Simply thinking about her makes me smile. She calls herself my fan and I know she tries hard to act normal around me but I can read her like an open book. I never knew that someone could affect me in this way because I have never dated before. I know it sounds cliche but that's the truth. I have friends and all but having someone who makes you feel like never before was just a thought for me. I don't know where my heart will take me but I know with her, it is safe.
I must admit that sometimes she just gets annoying behind the camera. She wants everything to be fucking perfect and precise. I know, like me this is her first project too and I totally get it. But I wonder how frustrating it might become for Millwen and others working back there with her, running around with flashes and switching lights at her beck and call. I am doing this scene today where I have to act drunk. I have to break glasses and plates and make a mess. Then fight with Tessa and act like a jerk. Then we have an intimate scene. As awkward as it sounds, it is not the same when we do it. The level of comfort I have with Jo is unparalleled. Sometimes both of us end up laughing at Nirvana's red face. She has problem in handling this and I find it funny. Jo is really cool and I couldn't have asked for a better partner.
After the shoot, all of us hangout together. Even though all of us have bonded well, I enjoy Swen's company the most. He is elder to me and his sister Meadow is a part of the movie too. He was also the first one to notice my certain interest in Nirvana. "Looking at the camera has never been this easy" he remarked. I don't blame him. You can not , not notice Nirvana. She brings liveliness wherever she goes and I can bet, the entire back unit boys eyeing her. But I am the lucky one and I am going to take her out today for our 'official date'.
For me it has become more like a routine to look for her after packup. "Hi Fatima" I called out the costume designer. She is very small and petite. And the way, she snapped her neck to look at me, I think it might have just cracked. "Hi Hero" she said with wide eyes. "Hey! Have you seen Nirvana ??" I asked her handing my black leather jacket. "Oh yes. She was here until Mill dragged her out to talk" she said with a confused look "I wonder what is it that he literally pulled her out like that and shouted on me. Anyway if you find them please let them know that I am going home" she said in annoyance. "Uh..Ok. I will do that." I replied as she left giving me a smile. What is up with the Mill guy? Not that I care or I am prying or anything. He is her friend and they are close and I have no problem with that. Whom am I to have a say in her friends ? It is just that I care about her and Fatima made it sound more of concern. There is no harm in looking for them so I started looking around. I went back to the set, checked the vanity area, the dress room, canteen but could not find them. She is not answering her phone either. "Hey buddy? Looking for something?" Shane asked. "Not really. By the way have you by any chance seen Nirvana?" I asked him with fingers crossed. "The camera girl right? Yeah I saw her there near the unit room with her assistant" he said pointing towards the unit room. It is basically a small room for the unit and background workers to keep their things at the back. I quickly hurried towards the room and just when I reached near the room I could hear voices but it was incoherent. When I neared it I heard Mill shouting "He is not good for you damn it !!!!".

Nirvana's POV -
Wtf is wrong with Mill?

Today I got ready before time as I couldn't sleep well. I wore a white playsuit and made a messy bun because heat is blazing up every day. Mill honked while I grabbed my bag."Good morning. Where is Fatty?" I asked resting my head on the headrest. "She was needed early today" he said looking straight. "Great so what's up?" I asked him adjusting the AC. "Nothing" he said in an uneasy tone. Something is wrong with him and I can strongly feel the uneasiness around us for a few days now. "Mill?" I turned to face him. "Yeah?" he said without looking at me. "Is something wrong?" I asked finally. Mill is one of my closest friends and I care for him so if something is bothering him, I must know that.
"Nothing" he said but it sounded far away from nothing. "Mill if something is going on, you can tell me." I said placing my hand on his shoulder which he shook away. "What is it, will you please tell me?" I asked exhausted with his constant 'nothings'. I didn't realize when we reached the set. I sat there in silence expecting him to say something but all he muttered was "We are getting late".
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The first half of the scene was interesting, watching Hero throwing and shattering glasses, China glasswares and other crockery in this big kitchen. Then he took an empty bottle made of opaque glass and moved towards the pool. Is he going to swim drunk? No, he is just sitting there on a pool chair taking swigs of air from that bottle. Then Tessa comes and gives him a good piece of mind. I ask Mill not to put any lights near them as I want the blue of the water in the pool to be the only source of light there in the dark. But Mill simply puts off all the lights without any word to me. After that they end being intimate and we are done. I am kind of getting better in shooting such scenes and I can experiment with the angles.
After packup I was busy talking to Fatty when Mill came and started talking to Fatty as if I didn't exist. You don't want to tell something fine, but acting like an asshole won't go down well with me. "Mill will you tell me what is fucking wrong with you? Or trust me this is the last time I will ask." I said frustrated. "As if you give a single flying fuck?" He snapped on me. "What the hell Mill?" Fatty shoved him. "Stay out of it !!!!" He shouted on her and grabbed me by my arm. "Where are you going?" I asked him catching my breath as he was fast. "You want to talk right?" he said opening the unit room and letting me in before closing it ajar. "You are asking me what's wrong. Nirvana don't you think that something is fucking wrong with you" he shouted back. "Wrong with me? Heck!!! What are you talking about?" I asked confused with this sudden argument. "Really? Then tell me when was the last time we met?" He asked or rather mocked. "Mill we meet every single day." I said out of anger. "Screw it !!!I am not talking about coming together and leaving together from work. I am talking about us hanging out, catching up." What is he saying? "Mill we are in a project which is taking all our time and energy. Gosh !!! Are you seriously throwing all this tantrum because we don't party anymore? Helllllooo!!! No one is partying since this shoot started." The fact that all shit is for no sense is simply pissing me off. "We have worked before and do you really want me to spit it out for you? You don't have time and energy to hang out with us but you definitely have a lot to hang out with Hero. Right?" He said inching towards me. Seriously? Is this all about me and Hero. "Mill you have gone fucking crazy. I don't hang out with Hero. We went out together one evening. Just one single evening that's it." I said in the calmest way possible. "Rest of the days, you drop me off at my place where I sleep the whole night, get ready for you to pick me up back from there to bring me here". This is so lame. And why the hell am I explaining to him? "You don't have time for us anymore and you are not the same since all this started" he said eyeing me. This started? What started? The shoot or me and Hero dating? Fuck ! I don't care to know. "Mill I don't even know why am I explaining all this to you. But will you stop acting like a douchebag? Nobody is being like this other than you. Not Anna, not Fatty. No one but you. Why? Why Mill?" I am in no mood to carry on this topic, so this has to end right here. He looked at me for a moment before saying, as if measuring his own words. "Because I care for you" he said looking straight in my eyes. "You care for me? Nobody acts this idiotic in caring" I said. I don't really get it where this thing is going now. "I know you like him and you are happy with him. But that is not it. Vani he is not good for you damn it !!! Why can't you see it?" he shouted pressing my shoulders. "Don't bring Hero into this" I said clutching my fist. How can he reason out Hero for his own moronic behavior? "Vani you don't get it. This is all just a refreshment for him. A way for him to maybe keep himself busy or something, to keep himself distracted or occupied ...... He doesn't feel for you the way you do" Mill said in a low voice. I closed my eyes. I can't take it anymore. "Mill you don't know him" I said turning to leave but he grabbed my wrist. "You are nothing but a play for him. The day this shooting is done, he won't even recognize you. I don't want you to get hurt and he will hurt you". "No. I won't !!!" echoes in the room and I turn back to find Hero.

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