Monster: A Werewolf Romance

20. WE NEED TO TALK

KYLE

"What were you thinking?" Abigail tailed behind me, as I pushed everybody around me, trying to get some place quiet. Quiet enough so that I could make sense of what just happened.

"Kyle?" I could hear the pain in her voice and that stopped me, so I grabbed her arm. We needed to talk.

"Come with me." I said but then heard the people hoot again, as Kaea came out of the room. But she didn't look at them, she looked at me, looked at my hand grabbing Abigail's, and with a sad smile, shook her head, turning away.

I dropped Abigail's hand, not really knowing why it mattered, but she followed me anyway. The stairs to the roof were empty, and I sat there, and Abigail sat beside me. She didn't touch me, which was definitely something new.

"I thought you hated her." She murmured.

"I do." I do. I do. I do. I kept repeating it like a mantra in my head, because it was true. I hated her, but sometimes-

Sometimes I forgot that.

"Kyle, I saw you together-"

"It was a part of the game, Abigail."

"What you were doing with her? It wasn't." She sounded so meek and so small, that I didn't know what to say to her.

"Does it matter? You... you are not in love with me." She wasn't my mate, she knew that. I had told her so. But I had promised her she would be something like that, if she wanted it.

And she was so sure she would never find hers that she agreed.

"You told me, I could be your Luna."

"I meant it."

She sighed. "Kyle, I know we are not mates. But even humans fall in love. If I have to become your Luna, if we are going to do this... let's do it right."

I frowned. "What are you saying?"

"I could one day be in love with you. Even right now, you are very special to me." She bit her lip. "I just... it hurts me to see that."

This made no sense. We were both in an open relationship, consensually. Why would something as small as kissing another girl hurt her?

Unless it was the girl that hurt her.

"Are you upset because it was Kaea?"

She stayed silent, but that was enough answer. I stared ahead, at the mingling crowd of drunken people.

"I know she is your mate, Kyle."

My neck almost cracked as I spun to look at her. How did she...how could she....?

"I have seen the way you look at her. I know you better than almost everybody, maybe just less than Mason. And underneath so much hatred," she laughed without humor, "you love her."

"I don't." I growled lowly.

"I know you do. Or something like it. I saw it for years before, how you couldn't get enough of her. I saw it today, and I always will see it, because it will never go away."

"I-" I tried to say something to completely eradicate her, but nothing came out of my mouth. But I knew she was wrong. How could this even come to her mind?

"One day, you'll look in the mirror and see it. It's just- before that, I thought we could be together. But it was always her for you, and then I thought we could be mates, and she took that too. And then I thought, since you still don't want her, then it could be me. You could be mine.

"And today, I know that it isn't possible. I was a fool."

"Abi," I held her face in my hands, "I don't know why you think that. If I had a choice, I would choose you."

I pressed my lips against her, and she kissed as good as always, but I couldn't feel it. I couldn't feel anything. Her lips moved against mine, but they didn't fit. Her smell didn't drive me insane. I wasn't thinking of a million ways to touch her, she wasn't driving me insane. 

But that was only because she was my mate. If I do reject her...maybe...?

But still, it was just a kiss with Abigail, the way it should have been with Kaea. Maybe she sensed it, maybe she didn't, but she broke it, leaning her forehead against mine.

"You always had a choice, Kyle, and I don't think you realize how much you chose her."

And like everybody else, she left me alone with my thoughts.

___________________________________________

Some of my last few chapters have always ended with someone leaving. I hope this is not the case for next one, because really, how many times can you recycle the same sentence again and again.

In the media box, you'll find- "changes- XXXTENTACION". RIP.

I never really liked his songs, but I have to admit they are really good and this one is specially beautiful.

See you next week!

K R Y S T L E