Awakened

Seventeen

"What are you doing?" I whisper. His face is inches from mine, and his hand is still gently caressing my cheek.

"Beau... what are you doing?" I ask again. His eyes look conflicted, and I don't think he even knows.

"This dress, what are you doing wearing a dress like this? You had to know it would drive the guys crazy. Is that what you wanted?" He asks, and his voice is thick. His hand drops from my face and he traces from my neck to my thigh with his finger.

"You said I look at you with disgust? I don't think that emotion has ever been one I have felt when looking at you." he continues and I can't breathe. "I said I would wait because until today you were seventeen. You know I'm older than you. As much as I wanted to take you then, I can't risk it with stuff like that." His lips are moving against my neck as he speaks, and my entire body is shaking in response to his words. Take me? Shit.

"Then you said you'd never even been kissed before, and I knew I couldn't be your first. I know girls like you want romance. You want that grand romantic gesture don't you sweet Katherine?" I want to push him off of me, but I can't. I am frozen in place. My mind and body are on two different pages. I try to find my voice so that I can respond to him, but nothing will come out.

"Maybe, just this once I could do that. I don't think I can stand someone else getting to have you first. You are so pure. Untouched. My God, and you are sexy." My eyes widen as he continues to speak.

"Y-You can't just do this. You can't just treat me horribly and then corner me in bathrooms. I don't know what you consider romantic, but this isn't it."

I finally get the words out of my mouth, and he raises his gaze to meet mine. "I told you maybe this once I could try." his response sends chills down my spine. His hand slides into mine and he pulls me out of the bathroom. Once again my body is failing me. My brain is screaming for me to let go and run, but my body is acting in defiance. He turns the knob that leads to his bedroom and he steps inside. I remember the harsh words that he spoke to me the last time I was in this room.

"I thought no one could be in here." I whisper, and he ignores me. He walks across the room and opens the balcony door, and reaches out his hand for me to join him. What the fuck am I doing. I walk towards him, and I know my face is riddled with confusion. I look up and see the the sky full of stars. His hand finds my cheek again and he tilts my face up towards him.

"I'm no good with words, so I'll use those of another who is." he says slowly, and his mouth moves closer to mine.

"You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how."

He is quoting Margaret Mitchell, and I am as good as done for. His lips are on mine, and the gentle kiss surprises me. I feel my body going weak, and his arms wrap around me to keep me from falling. When he pulls away I want to cry out. I want to beg him not to stop.

My skin feels hot, and my heart is pounding. His hands are still wrapped around me, and I want him to fill the space between us.

"How was that, sweet Katherine? Have your expectations been met?" he asks, and his voice is tender.

"I- " I try to speak but my voice breaks. Instead, I nod. His finger traces the contour of my jaw, and I look away. I cannot handle the desire burning within me. He presses against my body and his lips are on mine again. This time the kiss is deeper, and I feel myself coming apart at the seams. His lips leave mine and he places a trail of kisses down my neck until he reaches my collar-bone. His nose gently nuzzles into my hair. I feel something hard pressing into my body, and I let out the tiniest moan when I realize what it is.

"You cannot do that. You cannot make those sounds. I will never be able to stop myself Katherine, and you are not ready for that." His voice has turned rough, and I can hear the hunger in his words. He pulls back and I steady myself against the wall. I press my thighs together it hopes that it will make the pressure there subside. He sees this, and rubs his hands over his face.

"You are just making me want you more by doing that." he says gruffly.

"Katherine...?" I hear Sam's voice calling my name and my hand covers my mouth. Oh shit. He gestures for me to go to her, and I do. As I walk past him he bites his lip, and turns away.

"Where the hell have you been? I was really worried." she says. I apologize, and she smiles.

"I mean now that I know you're okay I'm good. Hey, why were you in Beau's room? He gets crazy about that shit. If he would have seen you in there he would have lost it." I shrug, and at that moment a small noise comes from his room. Dammit. Couldn't he have been quiet for a few minutes? Her eyes grow wide and she stares at me in disbelief. I plead with her to stay silent with my eyes, and she nods.

"Can we go get a drink please? I need one." I say flatly, and she drags me downstairs.

"What the fuck just happened." she whispers.

"Please, not now." I beg. Thomas sees me and makes his way over to us.

"Hey, I was starting to think you'd bailed." he says jokingly. I see Beau descend from the stairs, and Sam looks at me again as if the shock is effecting her all over again. I see a tall blonde wrap her arms around his neck as soon as he steps off the last step, and he does nothing to dissuade her.

"Uh, Thomas do you mind getting our girl a drink?" Sam asks him, and he nods. I stare as she blonde runs her long nails through his hair. He just stands there and lets her hang all over him. Sam shakes me.

"Katherine what the fuck is going on. Did he- did he come onto you or something?" she asks me, the defensiveness clear in her voice.

"Please. I promise I will tell you everything later. I can't do this right now." I plead. She concedes, but I see the way she keeps staring at Beau. She is not going to let this go easily.

Thomas returns with another red cup and hands it to me. "Do you want to go outside and talk?" he asks me. Sam raises an eyebrow, and look back over to Beau. The blonde has her hand against his chest, and they seem deep in conversation. I turn back to Thomas and say okay, and we head for the door. Just as we are about to walk out, I look back once more. This time, Beau's eyes are on me. He is watching to see what I will do. I let Thomas lead me outside, and we find a seat on a lounge chair.

"How has tonight been?" he asks me, and I try to muster up a smile.

"It's been great, I've had fun." I answer back. Why the hell do I feel so guilty?

"Good. I am glad you wanted to do this tonight. You fit well here." he says sweetly, and I smile genuinely this time.

"That means a lot to me. You've been so accepting of me, and I can't thank you enough. I was so scared to be somewhere new with no friends." He flinches at the word 'friends'.

"About that, Katherine I don't just want to be your friend. You know that right? I thought I'd made that clear." This is just great.

"Oh. Well, I don't know. I mean, I know you seemed flirty tonight. I'm not very good with interpreting signals I guess." I answer truthfully.

"That's alright. How about you let me take you somewhere then? Let me show you, be more clear?" he asks quietly. "Not tonight of course, I mean a real date. I could take you to dinner?" How is it possible to have two completely different interactions with these boys on the same night that both leave me reeling.

"I- I think I would like that." I reply.

What the fuck have I gotten myself into.