Awakened

Forty-Two

I stayed there by the door for hours. I stayed until my mother took my hand and led me to my bedroom. My eyes burned from crying. I let the tears fall until there was nothing left.

"Honey? You need to get some sleep." My mother cooed. "That was- well that was quite a lot to handle for one night."

I was grateful that up until now no one had mentioned Beau, or made any comments about me needing to stay away from him. The evening hadn't exactly gone smoothly, and I knew that both my parents would be elated to get me in that car in the morning.

I stared at the ceiling until I could no longer make out the spinning fan blades. It all became a blur. Shutting my eyes seemed like an impossible task. Anytime I did, all I could see was Beau on top of his father. All I could see was the hurt in Cynthia's eyes. 

I had often found myself wondering what would happen if everyone learned the truth about Mr. Dalton, and the truth about why Beau is the way he is. I never thought it would play out like this, though. I never considered that we would all be there to witness this family crumble to pieces. 

When I rolled over to check my phone for the time, a small part of my hoped there would be a message from Beau. I needed to know if he was okay, there was no way I could sleep until I knew he was. 

There was a message, and it had come in over an hour ago. 

How the hell did I miss that? How is it possible that I didn't hear my phone go off? 

As the blurred words on the bright screen slowly came into focus I felt my stomach lurch. 

Beau: I'm so sorry, Kat. I'm so fucking sorry for everything. I never wanted this. I never wanted to hurt anyone, but that's what I do. I hurt the people I love. 

My heart hurt for the boy that I loved. I did love him. I loved him with everything inside me, and it killed me that there was nothing I could do to take away his pain. None of this was his fault, but once someone believes something to their core there is little that can be done to change it. 

Katherine: Please don't apologize. Where are you? I can come to you.

I stared at the small words on the screen that told me the message was unable to be sent. 

How is that possible? 

I quickly clicked onto his name and tried to call, but again was met with a robotic voice telling me my call could not be completed as dialed. 

Bile was rising in my throat. I threw off the comforter and ran for the stairs. Everything was moving in slow motion. When I finally reached the Dalton home I didn't need to look towards the driveway to know his car was gone. 

I beat on the door, praying that someone inside was still awake. When Thomas' blood shot eyes met mine I knew he was gone. 

"When did he leave?" I managed to say. 

"Probably two hours ago. We tried to stop him, but-" I didn't wait for him to finish the sentence. 

"We have to go. Now. We have to find him." Tears were welling up in my eyes again. 

Thomas looked down at me, and I knew his heart was broken too. "Katherine, he's probably just blowing off some steam. I'm sure he'll be-"

I cut him off again, "His phone is disconnected. He's running. You have to know that, deep down. Please, take me to the boat. That's where he'll be."

 "Disconnected?" He asks. 

I nod. "Please, take me there." 

To my relief he grabs his keys, and within seconds were pulling out of the driveway. 

"All this time I thought- I thought he was the reason there was so much tension. I blamed him for so many things." Thomas says, almost in a whisper. "Did you know the truth?"

 I nod again, not able to face him. 

"Why would he keep that from me? I don't understand. Why did he let me blame him?" 

I wipe away a tear from my eye. "He couldn't bear hurting your mom, or you. Or Abigail. He just shouldered that pain so you wouldn't have to." 

We sit in silence until the docks come into view. I don't even remember where I'm going, but I run towards the large boats rocking with the water. Thomas calls from behind me, but I don't wait. All I can think about is getting to him before it's too late. 

I let me heart lead me, and a familiar set of sails remind me of the night I spent with him here. I remember passing the red, white, and blue sails as we made our way to the Andiamo. I know I am headed in the right direction. 

My feet stop in the same place they did that night, when he reached out his hand and pulled me on board. I stare at the empty space where the magnificent boat once was, and my entire body goes numb. 

I can feel Thomas stop behind me, but I don't turn to face him. I just lose myself in the dark water. 

"We're too late." He mutters. 

I don't know how to feel. I don't know what to say. All I know is half my heart just sailed away with the tide and I can barely breathe. 

I never even told him that I loved him, though he had to have known. Hell, I think deep down I've known all along that Beau Dalton would be my undoing. 

"Take me home." I say, and without another word we walk back to the car. 

***

"That's the last of it." My father said as he shut the trunk. "Katherine, honey, are you ready to go home?" 

Home. Such a strange word. 

There was a time when that was my home. That was before I had the Summer that shook me to my core and showed me that before now I had merely been floating through life, not really living. I was just a small girl who thought that the only things that mattered were getting into a good school and making my parents proud. I was blissfully unaware of just how beautiful yet brutal life could really be. 

I had found myself here on these shores, and with that also found a new group of people that had become my family. When Cynthia wrapped her arms around me there was a desperation there, and when I realized that Frederick was nowhere to be found I knew why. 

She'd made him leave, and even though she'd done that she still lost her son again. Her perfect world had been burned to the ground in a matter of minutes, and in the process she'd lost both of them. 

I knew she was strong, and that she would make it though this. That didn't make it any easier to walk away. 

With every step towards my parent's car I felt another piece of me break. How could I leave? How could I possibly leave this place with no closure? How could I just accept that this was how it ended?

I couldn't. 

There was no way this was the end to our story. I have read thousands of books, all with different endings. Our story had just begun, and I wasn't prepared to shelve it in hopes that eventually the hurt would subside. 

I may have to go back to my childhood home for now, but now I know that there is a great big world out there waiting for me. It's waiting for me to finish my story, it's waiting for me to finish our story. 

End of Book One.