Love of a Raven

Chapter 43: My Actions Can't Be Undone

How could I let this happen? Why did I not check to see if I was in danger before I attacked? If I hadn't succumbed to my demonic side, I would have seen him standing in front of me. I would have stopped the second I laid my eyes on him instead of seeing my arm through his chest.

"Luka. . . I-I am so sorry. . . I didn't. . . I thought. . . I'm so sorry!" I cried to my younger brother as I stared at him.

Luka, who had no part in my mother's army nor was he the source of my anger, was now suffering by my hands. I did not want to remove my arm from him, but I could not keep him in that state. After I pulled my arm from him, Luka immediately began to fall to the ground. Though, I was able to catch him as he coughed blood into my shirt. I cringed when I heard him cough, but there was nothing I could do. The damage is done.

"I-I don't blame you for this. . . Re-remember that. . . Damian tr-tried to stop me, b-but I couldn't. . . stand to s-s-see you like that. . ." Luka assures which only brought more guilt to me.

"I'm so sorry. . . M-maybe I can cure you! I-I'll get Acantha! Or I'll find the nearest witch to save you!" I state in desperation, but even I knew this was beyond any witch's healing abilities.

"I-I'll be fine, Garrick. . . I'll tell Lily that y-you were sorry you couldn't protect her. . . But I have something for you at home. . . I-I wanted. . . I wanted y-you to see it. . ." Luka replies, choking a little at the end.

Looking down at him, I see he is not well. Luka's eyes which used to hold happiness were now filled with despair. Not long after that, they were brimming with tears. Although, there was nothing I could do or say to him. It would make this worse if I tried to comfort him by lying to him.

This was all my fault! He's dying because of me! I killed my little brother! Hell, I might as well have killed Lily! And for what?! Why do they have to die for my mistakes?!

"W-we have it. . . A photo of Alexa. . . Alexandru. . . We have it, Garrick. . . Y-your journalist found one. . . I left it as a gift for you, but please. . . Don't listen to Mother. . ." Luka states as he clutches onto my shirt.

A bit of joy came over me, but it was short-lived. His news could not distract me with the greatest sorrow I have ever felt. So, I tried to prevent him from saying anymore. "I'll take a look soon. Just don't speak anymore. Save your energy."

"She's wr-wrong. . . You are n-not a killer. . . Alexandru will see that, I know he will. . . Don't let her get the best of y-you. . ." Luka struggled to say because he was choking on his own blood.

He's dying, I thought to myself while I shut my eyes. I held Luka close to me until he was done coughing. When he began to sob, I stroked his hair slowly as a way to ease his nerves. I wanted to prevent Luka from feeling worse than he already is by forcing myself to not cry. If I cried beside him, he would be reminded of his fate.

Instead, I held him close while his sobs became whimpers which were followed by his body convulsing. Thankfully we were close because my brother had one last parting message for me. Both his final words and his body becoming still had me screaming up to the heavens.

"Happy birthday, Garrick. . ."

Luka's final words broke my resolve to hold my tears back. They should not have filled me with despair. They should have reminded me that today was supposed to be a celebration of living another year. Rather, his words had made it a day that only Death will be happy about.

To make matters worse, I couldn't stop the images from repeating itself. Over and over again, I relive the massacre I caused just mere moments ago. The death of Lily. My fight with the twins that awakened the demon inside me and killed everyone. The hybrids, my parents, and poor Luka.