The Decision

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"Please Peter." Edmund sobbed.
Peter's heart broke as he listened to Edmund.
"Please." Edmund whispered.
Peter took a deep breath, kneeling down in front of Edmund, gripping his arms.
"Edmund look."  He said, forcing back the tears. "I-I can't do - do anything."
Edmund stared at Peter, eyes wide as more tears ran down his face.
"You - You just need to be brave." Peter choked.
"I don't want to be brave." Edmund said, kneeling in front of Peter and once again buring his face into his shoulder.
"Edmund, you can do it." Peter said, taking a deep breath.
"No I can't." Edmund said, gripping Peter shirt.
"Ed. If you can be anything, it's brave." Peter said.
"I'm not brave." Edmund muttered against Peter's chest.
"Edmund." Peter sighed.  "You got through half a week with the witch. If that's not brave, I don't know what is."
"But I wasn't brave." Edmund choked. "I was scared."
Peter bit his lip. "You still got through it." He sighed.
Edmund sniffed. "Just." He said.
Peter tightened his grip on his brother, kissing the top of his head. "Alright." He said. "Who decided to fight the witch?"
Edmund sniffed. "M- Me." He said.
"Exactly." Peter said, forcing a smile. "Now that's brave."
Edmund took a deep breath.
"Look, Lucy has her cordial, doesn't she?" Peter said with a weak smile.
Edmund nodded slowly.
"So everything will be fine." Peter told Edmund. "Everything will be fine." He repeated.

☆☆☆

Edmund sat at the table eating tea. Without looking at them he could tell his siblings kept casting him odd glances.
Edmund sighed as he pushed his food around his plate. His heart was pounding in his chest, in almost six hours, he was going to be stabbed, again.
He swallowed down the lump in his throat as he shifted in his seat.
He just had to be brave. He could do that, couldn't he?
He took a deep breath, his thoughts trailing back to this afternoon, when Peter hadn't let anyone leave the throne room until they told him who left the note and who was going to, well, cast the spell?
Obviously he never got an answer, everyone was silent for the whole two hours.
It was clear that nobody liked him. Edmund sighed. Nobody liked him. Tears filled his eyes as he looked down at his plate, trying to hide the tears from his siblings.
He should just run away. He thought with a quite snort. Then his face changed, maybe that wasn't such a bad idea. If he ran away, the Narnians would get their wish, and he'd be away from the whispers, the notes, the stares, everything.
Edmund thought for a moment, frowning slightly. Everything. Everything meant Lucy, Susan and... Peter.
But, the longer he stayed here, the more angry the Narnians would get with him.
Edmund nodded to himself, making up his mind. He was leaving. Everyone would be better off without him anyway.
But he'd do it tomorrow, not today. Tomorrow night, he decided silently, he'd sneak out, and leave... Forever.
"Ed?" He heard Peter question.
Edmund looked up at him.
"Are you not eating?" Susan asked.
Edmund shook his head. "Not hungry." He mumbled.
He heard Susan sigh and saw Peter's worried look.
Lucy glanced from each sibling, tears threatening to fall. But she refused to let them. If she cried, Peter would cry, which means Susan would start crying, and then that would set Edmund off, and she knew that once Edmund started crying, they wouldn't be able to calm him down until after midnight.
"Edmund?" Peter asked. "You okay?"
Edmund took a deep breath before hesitantly nodding, keeping his mouth shut. No, he wasn't okay. He was scared. Really, really scared.

☆☆☆

Edmund was visibly shaking as he sat on his bed, Peter one side of him, Susan the other and Lucy sat on the floor in front of them.
It was ten minutes til midnight, and the four siblings could only sit and wait.
As the seconds ticked by on the clock they all become more and more anxious. Edmund more so than any of them.
Seven minutes to, and he rested his head on Peter's shoulder.
Five minutes to, and he wrapped his arms around Peter's waist, moving closer to him.
Three minutes to, and he was practically sitting on Peter's lap.
Peter held Edmund tightly, feeling his brother trembling. He looked at the clock, noticing that Susan was doing the same. One minute to midnight.
He felt Edmund freeze in his arms, his breathing quickening.
"Shh." Peter muttered, casting a slight nod at Lucy, who nodded slowly back. "It's alright." Peter whispered into his brothers ear. "We're here."
Edmund sniffed, one tear making its way down his cheek, slowly followed by another.
Peter glanced at the clock again. Ten seconds. This was it.
He held his breath as he counted down in his head.
And then, Edmund let out a terrible gasp, hands going to his stomach.
Peter's eyes squeezed shut as his hand on Edmund's back was suddenly wet with blood.
Lucy jumped off the floor as Edmund fell back onto the bed, eyes closing as he started to gasp for air.
Lucy perched on the edge of the bed, Susan sitting behind Edmund, once again placing his head in her lap.
Peter sat beside his brother, tears filling his eyes as he stared at the look of agony on Edmund's face.

"It-it was horrible! It was agony! I couldn't breath! The pain was unbearable! I was choking. I couldn't feel anything!"

Peter let out a small sob as he watched Lucy pour one drop of her cordial into Edmund's open mouth.
He watched in fear as Edmund stopped breathing. He lay perfectly still, the look of pain still on his face.
He almost fainted in relief when Edmund started to cough. His eyes slowly opened as he looked up at his siblings.
And without another thought, Peter had Edmund in his arms and was gripping him tightly as though he'd never let go.

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆

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