Tell Me I'm an Angel (Frerard)

Private Angel Log Entry Four

Private Angel Log Entry Four

I don't know why I am still writing in this log since its contents are no longer secret, but it seems it has become habitual, and I have no other way to pass the time right now. At the very least, if I don't make it out of this alive, I pray that Gerard will find this, so he will know what truly happened, and how much he means to me.

I never thought things would end up this way, but there is no turning back now. All I can do is press onward and hope this ends better than it began.

I will now record the events that followed after Gerard and I parted ways for what we assumed would only be a few hours....

I winged my way back to Heaven in a daze, replaying the kiss Gerard and I shared over and over again in my head. It had been absolutely magical, and I would never forget it, but I wondered what it meant to Gerard...I mean, he had already kissed me once before, but did he feel the same budding devotion that had begun to fill my heart?

He was under an unimaginable amount of stress, and he could simply be looking for comfort anyway he could get it, and tonight he had given in completely to his demon instincts, it could have just been pure lust that caused him to kiss me with such passion, and not any actual affection.

I couldn't believe how attached I had become to Gerard in such a short amount of time, but I was done denying it. I mean, I was willing to throw away everything for him without question. He had revived my weary soul, and I would do anything to save his from the ravages of living in Hell. The world had become new and exciting to me, instead of the dull grey existence I had been trudging through the past few years, and it was all thanks to Gerard.

Now that he was leaving Hell, I had irrefutable proof that he was different from every other demon. I had already known that, but seeing him take this final step validated everything I had ever believed about him. He wasn't a bad man, he just lost hope, and that shouldn't have condemned him to a life of suffering.

After arriving in Heaven, I turned my feet toward the Holy Library. I needed to find a place with low demon activity (which also meant no angels would go there) for Gerard and Mikey to hide out in. I waved to Brendon as I entered, he was the Keeper of the Word, which basically meant he cared for the ancient texts the library contained. He was a very friendly person, and since I had been spending so much time down here lately searching for a way to save Gerard (I wasn't having any luck yet, much to my dismay) we had gotten close.

Brendon was a kind soul who abhorred fighting and conflict. I had been sure he would ascend when he came to Heaven, but he had refused, saying that he couldn't leave until his partner Ryan joined him. He loved to regal me with stories about his lover, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't envious of his relationship. I missed the sensation of being in love and having those feelings returned, and the way he so obviously adored Ryan, even after being separated from him, made me long for someone of my own.

I found my way back toward the geographical reports, which held the maps which logged all recent demon encounters. As I pulled out the most current volume, another book came with it and fell open on the marble floor.

Sighing to myself, I picked it up and glanced at the page it had landed on. It was the sixth prophecy from Joshua, which I had read numerous times before. Idly, I flipped to the next sheet to make sure the spine wasn't damaged, when I noticed a glaring irregularity.

Doubling back just to check that my eyes hadn't deceived me, I furrowed my brow in concentration. The book skipped from prophecy number six to number eight...even the page numbers were off by one, jumping from eighty-two straight to eighty-four.