Crash And Burn

Chapter 7

Jordyn awoke the next morning with a pounding headache and an overwhelming feeling of dread.

Ryan was not in bed next to her, and it looked like his side had not been slept on.

On the night stand next to her were a couple of Ibuprofen and a bottle of Body Armor. There was a note from Ryan saying that he was at a sponsor appearance and would be back in a couple of hours, and then they would talk about last night.

Oh God! What did she do? It was obvious Ryan had not slept in the bed last night. Did she do something that possibly ruined the best thing that ever happened in her life?

She needed to talk to Mel. She took The ibuprofen and washed it down with the Body Armor, hoping to get rid of the pounding in her head.

She quickly got dressed, grabbed her sunglasses and phone and made her way to Chase's bus.

Chase answered the door when she knocked. "Jordyn, I didn't expect to see you up this early. How are you feeling?"

Ignoring his question, she asked "Have you talked to Ryan this morning?"

Chase shook his head. "Not yet. I think he had to meet with the Ford people this morning."

Did I do anything stupid last night?"

Chase laughed. "You were pretty wasted and all over Ryan, but I don't know about anything stupid. You'll have to talk to Ryan about that."

"Is Mel awake?"

"I doubt it, but you can go see. I have to get going. I have a sponsor appearance myself."

Jordyn entered the bedroom and Mel was curled up under the sheet.

"Mel. Wake up. We need to talk." Jordyn shook her lightly.

"No. Go away."

"Mel. I need to talk to you. It's important."

Mel pulled the blanket off her head and threw her arm over her eyes. "I need to know if I did or said anything stupid last night." Mel laughed.

"We were both stupid drunk Jor. We were doing shots all night. Oh! You did tell Ryan you wanted to fuck. Please tell me that happened." Mel was wide awake now.

"I don't think so. Ryan wouldn't. He didn't even come to bed last night. He left a note this morning saying we need to talk about last night." Jordyn felt tears burning in her eyes. "I'm afraid I did or said something really bad and fucked everything up." She sobbed.

Mel pulled her into a hug as she cried. "You don't know that Jor. You are probably overthinking things. Ryan's a good guy and he's crazy about you. Just hear what he has to say. It may not even be a big deal."

"I hope you're right Mel. I'm gonna go back and wait for Ryan. I'm sorry I barged in here and woke you up."

"That's what besties are for. Go on and get pretty for your guy. You look like hell."

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Ryan knew he and Jordyn needed to talk, but he wasn't really sure what to say to her. She had revealed a few things about herself, but it was mostly in a drunken rant, so she didn't really make a lot of sense.

It was obvious she was holding on to some things from her past, but he figured she wasn't comfortable enough to share that with him, so he didn't push.

She had even told him she loved him, but he wasn't sure he wanted to bring that up. He figured that was probably the alcohol talking.

His appearance was over and it was time to face Jordyn. He hoped he could figure out what to say and not drive her away.

"Hi" Ryan said as he walked into the bus. Jordyn was sitting on the couch with her knees drawn up to her chest. "

"Hi." She said softly, not looking at him. He sat down on the couch next to her.

"How are you feeling this morning?"

"Like an idiot." She replied, finally looking at him.

"Trust me, I've been there." He said.

"Ryan, I have no clue what I said or did last night, other than a few things I gathered from Chase and Mel. I just have a feeling that I really made an ass of myself, especially after seeing your note that we need to talk about last night. I need to know what happened."

Ryan took a deep breath trying to come up with the best way to explain. He didn't want to embarrass her further. "You uh, you were coming on pretty strong. You uh, you wanted to have sex."

"I gathered that much from Chase and Mel. What happened?"

"Nothing happened. I told you before I would never take advantage of you. You were clearly not in your right mind."

"Ry, I know nothing happened between us, but did something else happen?"

"You brought up some things from your past. It was more of a rant than anything else. You were not making much sense. Stuff about flunking out of school, jobs you didn't need because you had money and you hinted around about a sexual past and got upset because you thought that I didn't want you anymore. Jordyn, nothing could be farther from the truth. I slept on the couch last night because I did want you, and I didn't know if I would be able to refuse you again."

She looked at him and took a deep breath. "I think I might need to start at the beginning. There's some things I'm not proud of, but I think it's time. I told you my parents died when I was fifteen, but there is a whole lot more to the story. On the surface, we were the perfect family. Behind closed doors however, was an entirely different story. My mother and father both came from wealthy, influential families. Their entire marriage was nothing more than a business arrangement to link their two families together. There was never any love in that house. Both my mother and father had extramarital affairs and neither one made a big secret about it. One night, my dad came home unexpectedly. He was drunk and caught my mother with her latest lover. He threatened both of them, so they got in the car and took off. In a drunken rage, my father took off after them. He crashed his car into theirs and no one survived. It was a huge scandal and I was caught in the middle of it. Mel's parents took me in to keep me out of foster care, and they tried their best to shield me from everything.

She paused and took another breath before continuing.

"It was well known that I had inherited a very large sum of money. When I turned eighteen I moved out and went to college. Everyone knew who I was, and to cope with everything, I turned into a party girl. I could never hang on to relationships because every single time I confused sex for love, and it all fell apart. I flunked out of school because I was partying all the time. I couldn't keep a job because I just didn't care, and I convinced myself that I didn't need to work anyway. I was lost. It got worse when I turned twenty one and came into my full inheritance. It was then that I realized I needed to make a change. Believe it or not, it was actually Mel who convinced me I needed to get my shit together. I gave up the partying, I went back to school, but I just didn't know what I wanted, so I dropped out and decided to go with Mel to North Carolina. So here I am now. Still trying to figure out who I am and hoping that North Carolina has what I'm looking for." She fought back the tears that were threatening to fall.

He took her hand and said "I'm one thing in North Carolina that I hope you are looking for. Who you were back then was more or less a product of your environment. That doesn't define who you are now."

"I don't even know who I am now."

"Then let me help you figure that out." He said.