The Magic in Your Song(Trixya)

Chapter 16:Trixie

Trixie's POV
I've decided that Katya has many talents. From making really good drinks to painting, and even baking. I thought she was joking when she said her cake was perfect but when I took a bite, I saw just how serious that claim was. As we sat on the floor eating cake, the sun started to slowly rise. "Katya, what time is it?"

"Well my clock says it is 7:00am."

"Hmm, thought so."

"I'm sorry Trixie."

"For what Katya?" I looked at Katya as she played with her cake.

"Inviting you over. Calling as late as I did. Baking cake? Take your pick." I put down my cake and touched Katya's hand.

"Where is this coming from? Haven't you enjoyed yourself?"

"Yeah, I have. It's just you have a company to run and I haven't even been there for a month and I'm already messing stuff up."

"Katya, what have you messed up?"

"Well you're here when you should be at the office."

"Katya wanna hear a secret?" Katya nodded her head slowly as she held her knees against her chest, looking out the window. "I haven't had a day off in a year. I throw myself in my work because I want everything to be perfect. And even then I don't think it is enough. You are a breath of fresh air because you push me out of my routine without even knowing. So don't say sorry because I needed this." Katya looked up at me with tears in her eyes. I wiped a tear away with my thumb and smiled softly. "Thank you."

"A year huh?"

"Yep, a whole year."

"You're a crazy woman."

"Hey! I still am the one who's signing your paychecks." Katya and I went back to eating our slices of cake. After a few moments of silence, a thought came to my head. "Hey Katya?"

"Yeah?"

"What did you mean when you said I seemed like I needed a friend?"

"Well I dunno like, you seem so freaking busy that you don't actually have time for fun. And the friends that I have seen that you have are busy as hell, so a friend that isn't so busy seems a bit needed. I mainly work on my artwork and not much else. I know that may sound kinda sad but it is pretty nice. So I always have time."

"I'll make sure to remember that. Now I think we need to get a little bit of sleep because I want us to go into the office a little later." Katya nodded and stood up. She put our plates in the kitchen and cleaned up the mess from baking.

"Well I will see you in a few hours Ms. Mattel."

"You sure will Ms. Zamolodchikova." Katya walked in her room and closed the door with a smile. I walked in my room and took off my shirt before laying in bed. My cats cuddled up to me and I was at ease. Even if I wasn't going to get all my work done today, I was still going to have a good day. I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.

I was awoken by one of my cats meowing. I looked at my phone and saw the time. "Barbie it is 12pm what could possibly be wrong with you?" I covered my head with a pillow to try and hide from her noises but nothing was working, I got out of bed, walked down the stairs to where Katya put the bag with the treats and gave her some. "Spoiled brat."

"That would 100% be because of her mommy, who happens to be you." I jumped and turned to see Katya in a very interesting yoga pose.

"Fucking shit, you almost gave me a heart attack. Why aren't you sleeping?" Katya shrugged her shoulders and smiled.

"Why aren't you sleeping, Ms. Mattel?"

"This monster here woke me up because her stomach wanted food." Katya stood up and picked up Barbie, petting her.

"Awe she's not a monster. Are you? No you're not, your mommy is the monster isn't she? Yes, she is."

"Once again, she can't understand you." I rolled my eyes as Katya kissed Barbie on her nose. "Give me my baby."

"No, I think she wants me to be her new mommy." Katya walked in the kitchen and put on a kettle. "Maybe you should tell your old mommy she needs a shirt on." I looked confused at Katya and then down at my body. I had forgotten I took off my shirt. So as of now, I was standing in my assistant's kitchen with my pink lace bra on display. I turned around and walked back to the room I was staying in for the night.

"Shit, shit, shit. Good job Mattel, just had your tits almost all out. Ugh idiot." I slipped on a shirt and took a deep breath before walking back into the kitchen.

"There she is. Would you like some tea?"

"Sure." I walked around the island and sat on a stool.

"How'd you sleep?"

"Well, I was sleeping wonderfully until that monster in your arms woke me up. What about you?"

"I slept for maybe two hours or three and then I was up. I am an insomniac so sleeping is like a game of poker for me, well life in general. Sometimes I win and other times I don't. When I lose, I lose the bets I made."

"And what have been some of those bets?"

"Now if I told you that I would no longer be a mystery. I have to keep some of my secrets."

"Oh humor me. You saw me cry and then held me as I slept on my office floor. It would be a fair trade." Katya sat on the counter and looked at me.

"I suppose you are right. Well I lost the ability to believe in myself, fully. I doubt myself when I really have nothing to worry about or when I really need to have faith in my capabilities. It is like a game of cat and mouse, one minute the faith is there and then I have to chase it down. And you know the funny thing about faith is, you can't see it so it's hard to catch. How can you know when you believe in yourself when you don't have to? It is easy to say 'Oh hell yeah I got this' until you get there. In my opinion, believing in yourself is a show for others. You make others feel like you can do it, not so much as making yourself feel that way. We feel way better when others build us up, when they believe in us. When we fail at something we worry more about how others will see it than how we see it ourselves. That is why mistakes hurt so much, because we worry about how others treat that mistake." Katya leaned her head against one of the cabinets and closed her eyes. "If they treat it like the end of the world, then we do that but if they don't then it's easier for us to accept it and get back up." Katya opened her eyes and locked those pools of blue on me. "Do you get what I'm saying?" I could only nod my head as my heart was wrapping around her words.

"How are you handling it?"

"Handling what?"

"Believing in yourself."

"Well it isn't as hard as it used to be. Everything is hard when you hate yourself, you know the good stuff that you're supposed to do. Like waking up and taking the day by the horns, when you hate yourself you just feel like you belong at the bottom of the barrel. It's hard to do simple stuff that keep you alive. Stuff like eating, sleeping, even breathing. It all gets hard. But I don't hate myself anymore, yeah I hate what I've done in the past but I don't hate myself anymore. So I think I'm doing better. I don't kick myself for eating anymore or waking up, I embrace it and count it as a win for me. A win for the new life I'm giving myself. That's why I'm so thankful for the job Trixie. It is part of my new start, just like this house." Katya laughed and smiled at me. "Sorry that I'm throwing all this on you. You probably have no idea what I'm talking about." I looked down at my feet and took a deep breath.

"I understand more than you know." I stood up from the stool and smiled. "Come on, we have to get ready to go to the office and remember clothes that don't matter."