Psychopath (EDITING)

42

The next day, I find myself even more confused with what I'm doing. Memories of Stephan telling me his past, the way his eyes faded when he spoke about his father mindlessly stabbing his mother in front of him. The whole time I felt this huge ball of pain build up in my heart, the way his words came out of a deep and dark place. 

Mindlessly sitting in Stephan's living room, I stare out at the far windows and watch as the clouds swarm and swirl around free and careless. Come to think of it, I don't think Stephan even spoke about what happened with his father? Oh God is that psycho still alive??

Shit, I don't want to admit this, but his past— It explains a lot about the person who he is now. The constant search for power, the chilling fear of feeling powerless... Never wanting to be walked over, and never wanting to admit any faults. His father carved those things into his mind, and he will never want to admit it, but it's his father that is constantly affecting his life to this day.

I guess we're more similar than I thought. Fuck, this is so messed up.

"Hey, Sarah!" A bright voice rings out drawing me out of my ever building wall of feelings inside of my heart. My body instinctively jumps, as I turn around to see Mackie approaching me. Damn it, I can't seem to keep clear-headed if I'm dragged from both sides. 

"Listen, I don't have much time until I have to go down and get ready for the meeting, but I have a plan," Mackie blurts out, my brain barely catching up to the speed of his words. I try and interject, but Mackie just keeps going.

"It'll be after we get back, I've already gotten outside help to get both of us new identities and I've scored a place in Canada that we could go hide out in until he settles down. Knowing him, it'll take him a couple of days to get on with his life and move on," Mackie laughs lightly, but quickly looks around to make sure no one is listening to us.

This is when I knew that there was no going back after Stephan told me about his past. Unable to take it any longer, I quickly stop Mackie's rambling with my hand. As much as I wish I didn't, I don't think I'll be able to allow myself to run away now. Stephan's soft eyes, his warm hands, and the way he spoke so earnestly to me last night, he is like a whole new person, and I find myself actually hurting at the thought of leaving him. 

He's changed me.

And it terrifies the literal fuck out of me.

"Mackie, I was thinking..." I hesitate, "I think I'm going to stay," I blurt out, like ripping a bandaid off without a second thought. I shut my eyes, afraid of the possibility that I'm making the worst decision for myself. 

But, I hear nothing.

Slowly peaking, I jump back when I see his cold eyes staring right back at me. His dark brows are creased over his forehead, his mouth curved down into a deep and pissed off frown. I hear him scoff, as he rubs his hands through his hair. I'm lost for words, this isn't the Mackie that I know. His whole bubbly and nonchalant personality has been completely wiped off to reveal a colder and darker face underneath. Gulping, I try moving back away from him, afraid of what he might do to me. 

He follows me, a dark look in his eyes, and his lips curving up into a snarl. My eyes widen, as my heart quickens. Before I'm able to react, Mackie bites his lips, taking a deep breath in and closing his eyes. Clenching his jaw, he breathes out and it's almost like he completely switches persona, as he reverts back to his usual look.

"If you change your mind, don't hesitate to find me. I'm only trying to protect you," Mackie smiles, and turns around quickly and walks down the hallway. Staring at his wide retreating back, I'm completely frozen and lost for words. I would've believed him, if it wasn't for the slight trickle of blood falling down the inside of his palm, a small indent revealing the force of his fingernails piercing his skin.

☋

With Rose and Steph by my side, we head down to the foyer to see off Stephan and his men. Time seems to have flown by, 2 days passing faster than the slip of the tongue. 

My breath is taken away, shocked to see Stephan in a completely different, and almost over the top, outfit for his usual style. Even though the room is filled with people, silence hangs over the air. My chest fills with anticipation as Stephan slowly strides over to me. Gently smiling, Stephan comes close to my side, courteously nodding to Rose and Steph.

"Hey," Stephan calls out, placing a gentle finger underneath my chin, "Don't frown, baby. You're ruining your beautiful face," Stephan uses his finger to gently rub the spot between both of my eyebrows, as I feel my face gently soften at his warm words.

"We won't be long," Stephan smiles, "And George and his group will be watching over this pace while we're out," Stephan yanks over a man next to him and wraps him underneath his arm. George's scruffy hair gets ruffed by Stephan's play, pieces covering his puppy-like face. He's probably not even that much older than me. For a moment, I see a light blush flush across his face, as I see him glancing at Steph, but he masks it up to a more casual and professional look. Standing up straight, he nods at us and goes back to his group.

Laughing lightly, I see Stephan give Steph a playful wink, purposely looking from her to his retreating back. I see Steph raise a hand to her burning cheeks, making me quietly smile at the cute interactions between her and George. Turning to me, Stephan reverts back to his usual, stern but serious self. 

"I love you, baby," Stephan growls out possessively, using his hands on my waist to pull me close, "Everything is going to be different when I come back, okay? I promise you, baby girl," Stephan purrs out, placing a gentle kiss on my browbone.

Holding me tightly, Stephan buries his face into my hair, leaving gentle kisses on my neck. His scent surrounds me and makes me feel warm and secure.

"Please be safe, my love." Stephan breathes out, the tickle of his lips causing me to shiver all over.

Letting go of my waist, Stephan wraps both of his arms snuggly around my body, as my arms reach up and rest on his shoulders. His relaxed muscles give me a silent assurance that everything is going to be alright. My tight muscles burn against his body, fatigue from earlier catching up to me. Taking a deep breath, I try to take in as much as I can of Stephan's scent. I want to doubt it, but my body physically needs his comfort to keep moving. Gently rubbing my back, Stephan lightly pecks my head, and reluctantly lets go of me.

Hiding my blush, I look up to see the swarm of men slowly retreating out the door. Giving me one last peck on the cheek, Stephan heads out the door as well. Immediately, my arms feel so empty and cold, as I cross them and rub my hands across my arms. Rose's comforting hand rubs circles on my back, as the last person, Trevor, gives me a small smile and quick wave good-bye.

"Ha, you even have Trevor acting differently around you," Rose remarks, smiling fondly at me. Laughing lightly, I turn back around to follow Rose and Steph onto Stephan's living room couch.

Weird.

I feel like I'm missing something.