I walk up to my room window looking outside, I saw him, staring at me with those eyes that never left my mind.
I opened the window" what do you want from me again?" I yelled not bothered that i've woken up my neighbours.
He just stood there just s...
It's been two weeks, James never called, never texted and I don't know how I kind of felt. What his father said was true, I never told the guys what happened, they barley talked to James so I don't really know what's going on. My days were just ok but at night I can't even sleep because of the nightmares, I was so sick of it, it's the same stupid routine, I wake up from my nightmare, go to the bathroom, drink tea then go back to bed or go for a run.
Today wasn't the brightest day ever, I just felt like the weather, weak, numb, I don't really know. I got up from my bed and did my morning routine and got dressed,
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I went to the kitchen, made something to eat and left the house.
After my classes I went to meet the guys ate lunch with them then left to do some groceries shopping. It was getting dark so I got in the car and went home. I got out of the car and went inside the house, went to my room and quickly took a shower and wore Grey bickers and Brown crop sweater.
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I went to the kitchen and arranged what I bought in the kitchen. After I was done I made some pasta and went into the living room to watch something. It was 9:30 p.m., I was tired so I turned off the tv and went to my room praying to God that at least today I'll sleep peacefully.
I was already sleeping but not fully, my window was opened ajar, I enjoyed the air that was coming in, it wash fresh and I liked it. "Kamaria!" "Kamaria" I frowned because I heard someone calling me but I wasn't sleeping fully I was still pretty much awake but my eyes were closed, "Kamaria please open the door", I opened my eyes and stayed still wanting to hear who it was, my heart was beating fast, it was James voice and I heard it coming from the window, "Kamaria please!!", my eyes were opened in alert, I got up and I walk up to my room window looking outside, I saw him, staring at me with those eyes that never left my mind.
I opened the window," what do you want from me again?" I yelled not bothered that I've woken up my neighbours.
He just stood there just staring at me, his breathing was becoming heavy and I saw anger lash through he's eyes " I want you" he said, catching me off guard.
I was feeling so many emotions at a time, I was angry at him, sad that he came now, happy that he said he wants me, confused on why he was angry. I stood there staring at him, tears in my eyes, " leave me the Fuck alone, you don't want me, If you did you would have came earlier not two fucking week almost going to three, you expect me to believe you?, you called me and sent me a voicemail once James! Once and you come here saying you want me?" I said as tears streamed my eyes, I glared at him and his face softened, " Kamaria please just hear me out, I beg you open the door for me and I'm going to explain everything if you're not satisfied then that's fine, I ruined everything but please just listen to me" he said looking at me deep in the eyes, I wiped my tears and sighed, I wanted so bad to ignore him but I know I can't, I was just complicating my situation. I nodded and left my room, I went downstairs and opened the door and there he was, he looked messed up he had some fading bruises and I knew who did that to him, I looked away from him stepping aside for him, he entered and turned around facing me, " Kamaria I fucked up and I'm so so sorry, my anger took the best of me and I just acted without thinking, someone gave me that picture at the party, I was so angry and betrayed, i didn't look at the picture well, the guys came to my house and we solved the problem, I called you but I understood why you didn't pick up or answered, I gave you some days, I promise I wanted to come by but I was such a coward and everything was just messed up with me, my father kept pressuring me with the company, I was really tired, I go home and I'm reminded of what I've done, you were not there Kamaria, I'm nothing without you, I'm not myself without you, I want you back please, I promise I'll do better, nothing ever mattered to me till you came along, you were my fucking light and you give me peace, I fucking love you Kamaria, I'll never stop loving you" he had tears in his eyes, this was the second time James showed me his vulnerability, I shook my head and laughed, "You know your dad came by two weeks ago, he told me you were just using me and I after two weeks I believed him, he told me you were going to get married to a white girl, and after two weeks I believed him, he said-" James cupped my face in his hands, he was angry but careful, " babe listen to me, what he said was all lies, I love you and would never do such thing to you ok?, he's fucking racist and I fucking hate him, he doesn't have a say in my life anymore, I do what I want, I just keep with him because of the company I swear what he said wasn't true, you have to believe me" he said caressing my cheeks, I stood there letting my sobs out, " james i...." he pressed his lips against mine with hunger, I responded to the kiss immediately, I missed his sweet lips against mine, he pushed me against the door and kissed me roughly with passion, my hands were now on his hair pulling him closer to my body, I was hot all over, he groaned when I kept tugging at his hair, his hands left my face and came in contact with my ass, he squeezed and I moaned in our heated kiss, he hands roamed my body then he grabbed my thighs and lifted me up from the ground, my hands went to his shoulders for support and I wrapped my legs on his waist, I could feel his erection pocking my thigh, I moaned as he bit me lip, he held me and took me to I suppose my room because he climbed the stairs. He placed me on my bed gently still attacking my lips, he grinded his erection on my pussy and I moaned in pleasure, I placed my hand under his shirt loving the feeling of his body, he groaned, I tugged on his shirt and pulled it over his head, he the attacked my neck searching for my sport, I moaned out his name, he lifted his head, looking at me with lost and love in his eyes, we stared at each other, he smiled at me and caressed my cheek, " I fucking love you Kamaria" he pecked my lips, "I know" I said, he then kissed me, I was already dripping down there as he kept grinding his erection on me, before I knew it he took of my sweater and shorts, "Fuck babe" he looked at my breast, he covered my nipple that had a piercing on with his mouth and sucked on it, I arched my back feeling the pleasure become intense, " James!" I said gripping his hair tighter, he groaned then gave the same attention to my other nipple,i was breathing heavily trying to suppress my moans, James then looked at me, "I want to feel you baby" he said, my heart was beating fast but I was ready, I wanted to feel him too, all of him, " I want you too James" I whispered and stared at him, " Are you sure?, I don't want you to feel-" I cut him off by kissing him, he got the message and unzipped his pants taking both his boxers off, he took off my underwear as well, he trialled kisses from my neck to my lips, he pecked me then took his condom and opened it and slid it on his erection, he positioned himself between my legs, "Its gonna hurt a little babe, don't worry I'm here" he said and I nodded, I was a bit nervous because I never did it with somebody I love, his my first and I hope the last. He pushed himself inside slowly, I whined and held his shoulders in pain, he kept whispering smoothing words and kissed my tears away, he didn't move till I felt the pain turn to pleasure, I moved my hips a bit and he moved with a slow pace while kissing me, I wrapped my legs around his torso bringing him closer to me, I let out a moan as his pace increased, " Fuck Kamaria" he said as his thrust became deep and rough. The only thing that was heard was my moans and his groans and our body slapping, "Oh my God!!" I gripping his shoulders and kissed him deeply, He was all sweaty and so was I, he raised his upper body and held my waist thrusting hard and deep, He kept on going till I felt the orgasm coming and so was his, " James I'm about to cum!" I said breathing heavily, " Cum for me baby" as he said those words I came, my toes curled and my body shook, "I love you Kamaria!" He said as he came along, he fell on top of me and I hugged him As we tried controlling our breath, his weight on top of me made me relax, the heat radiating in his body was relaxing, he raised his head and kissed my lips, got up and threw away the condom, he came back and brought me close to him and finally slept in peace.
