*Warning(s):
~serious topic(s)
~talk of triggering words/images
Alright. Well, this is just a long part about what's going on with my mental health right now and if you don't want to read it, you don't have to. This is just for me to let out what I'm feeling and for whoever actually wants to read this to know the reason why I haven't been updating as often as I usually try to. Also, this is different from that "*Life" chapter I had posted on here a long time ago, as it goes into specifics of what my unwanted (intrusive) thoughts are.
I don't wanna trigger anybody on here. So, if at any point you need to stop reading this for a moment, stop reading this. Okay? I care about all of u and just because I'm suffering doesn't mean that I want any of u to suffer, okay?
Before I start going into specifics, I have to make this very very clear. Intrusive/unwanted thoughts are not a person's real thoughts. I tend to think of mine as the opposite of what my beliefs are (because they are). Actually, to make this easier, I'll list every type of unwanted thoughts that I know exist and I'll explain what they are and I'll say which ones I have. Just to let everyone know, because not everyone has the same type of unwanted thoughts.
Also, if you're a visual person, you can also get unwanted images, which are just as distressing.
Okay, so the first thing I know for sure is true is this:
Everyone gets unwanted thoughts.
Everyone. Even people who don't have diagnosed or undiagnosed OCD. The difference is people who don't pay attention to the unwanted thought and ignore it won't be bothered by it. Then, the people who do pay a lot of attention to the thought and start thinking about why they got the thought are the ones that start obsessing over it and that's where the problem is.
Usually, the ones that get obsessed over are the unwanted thoughts that go against a person's beliefs. A mild example, if you're against harming animals and the unwanted thought has to do with kicking a dog or something, you'll notice. An extreme example, if you're against racism and the unwanted thought has something to do with a racist action or slur or something, you're gonna definitely notice.
Okay, now here are the different types that I know of. Again, if you have to stop reading this because it's causing any anxiety for you, you can stop reading.
🔸Sexual unwanted thoughts
This is basically any unwanted thought that involves sex that disturbs you, like extreme violent, with inappropriate people, etc.
Personally, I get these unwanted thoughts, especially after watching TV where they mention things like that, and they get really annoying😒
🔸Unwanted thoughts about children
These are usually unwanted thoughts about doing something bad to the child, like harm them. This is especially distressing if they're about your own child, if you're a parent.
Personally, I really only get these when I'm around small children at family parties, as I'm an only child, and something that can harm them. It's scary because I would never harm a child.😢
🔸Religious unwanted thoughts
It's pretty much unwanted thoughts about religious figures and doing unholy things and things like that.
Personally, I don't get these a lot. But even though I'm not that religious (I believe in God, but I don't believe in every single thing mentioned in the Bible, a book a have never read), it's still scary when I get them.😔
