in a universe where jay actually fucking sleeps
~~~
[somewhere, in the middle of a clearing where everything is oversaturated]
Jay: ...How blackout drunk did I get?
Slime: Like seven!
Jay:
Slime: Seven whole drunks.
Jay:
Slime: Seven.
Jay: Okay. [takes out phone and goes to call someone but the phone turns into a banana] End me now.
Slime: How many?
Jay: What's the threshold for ending people?
Slime: Up to ten!
Jay: Maybe a three, then.
Slime: No, you can't choose three.
Jay: What? It's on the threshold!
Slime: Someone else already chose three, you can't choose three. Three is taken.
Jay: ...Four?
Slime: Someone chose four too.
Jay: Five.
Slime: Someone already chose five.
Jay: Okay, fuck, fine, ten.
Slime: Someone chose ten.
Jay: ??????????? Three thousand four hundred and sixteen.
Slime: Oh, sure.
Jay: WHAT
Slime: [sprouts a hand and slaps jay into 'unconsciousness']
---
Jay: JESUS
Stephen: We're having a tea party.
Jay: Why are you having a tea party in a GIANT BLACK VOID. [sits down at the table]
Hosuh: It's not a giant void, there's a waterfall right there. [points to where a waterfall just showed up]
Jay: But where's all the water coming from?
Daniel: Fear.
Hosuh: Fear of tea.
Jay: ??? You're drinking tea right now.
Hosuh: [spontaneously combusts into tea]
Jay: AAAAAAA
Stephen: Here's. [breaks teacup] The motherfucking. [smashes teapot on ground] Tea. [slams chair into table]
Daniel: Hey, I was eating that table cloth!
Stephen: No you weren't.
Daniel: I guess you're right.
Jay: You guys sound like Skyrim NPCs! And-- And Hosuh just EXPLODED!
Daniel: He does that, where have you been?
Stephen: Maybe he's not Jay.
Daniel: Ah.
Jay: Am I on something???
Stephen: We are on an airplane.
Jay: [slips and falls off airplane that suddenly appeared]
---
Jay: WHY DOES THIS NEVER END.
Ivu: [following an unending line of yarn] I have no idea...
Pau: HUEEEEEEEEEH
YOU ARE READING
Danplan on Crack
RandomBy the way, can the Danplan crew survive my hellish crack ideas? Spoilers: Probably not. ~~~ The only Danplan fic as chaotic as it's covers B^) This book does not incorporate ships, but if you so choose, anything can be seen as a ship thing. Just kn...
