Safe

-2- Therapy & Wings

Luke "Coach Mo" Morrison

Holt hits practice like he hasn't been out for over a week. If anything he's faster, quicker, more accurate.

I swear he isn't human. At least not when basketball is involved.

When he stepped into the gym today, all I heard were the boys welcoming him back. I think for the most part, they're all happy he's here. I am.

As I call them in for the final time before I end practice, I watch Drew throw an arm around Holt's shoulders causing the poor kid to jump a mile. But Drew isn't phased, he just drops his arm and continues talking to Holt.

By the time they reach me, Holt looks rattled and my attention focuses in on Drew. Our eyes lock and I narrow mine, wondering what it is that he's said to Holt.

"Good practice today guys. I know we've got a break coming up but I still want you conditioning on your own, so plan ahead, got it?" I bark my order at them.

"Yes sir." They chant in unison.

"Hit the showers." I wait until they all start moving before I call back Holt and Drew. Drew stands nearby, relaxed looking as he watches everyone disappear into the locker room. Holt stares at the ground, body stiff. "What's going on?"

"Nothing sir." Holt says but Drew is more forth coming.

"I was telling Holt I saw Ian over the weekend. His dad's pulling him from school and putting him into Paramount, said he's got a spot on their team." Drew explains.

I let out a sigh, figures. "Good for him."

I try to say it like I mean it and completely fail, granting me a laugh from Drew.

"Figured I should give Holt a heads up. Ian's still bitter about it all. We play them soon yeah Coach?" I nod my head. "You think Ian will start something?"

Holt hasn't moved this entire conversation but he's listening.

"He's smarter than that." I hope.

Drew scoffs. "Doubt it."

I shake my head in disapproval but he's probably right. Which means I need to be watching Holt and Ian like a hawk during the game. And if I have to pull Holt to protect him from Ian, I will.

"Go clean up Drew but I want to talk to you before you leave." He starts heading for the showers, head tipped back as he sucks down water from his bottle. He thrusts a thumbs up in the air even though I wanted a verbal response.

I'll let it slide.

I turn my attention on Holt who's still standing completely still, head down, waiting.

"How was today?" I ask him. "School?"

"Good sir." His response is immediate.

"Everyone was respectful?" I continue.

"Yes sir."

I study the boy before me. He doesn't look like much with his shoulders sagging, damp T-shirt stuck to a wiry body. But he comes alive on the court and it's something I want everyone to see. More importantly colleges. I haven't even told Rhett yet but I sent some footage from practice and the last game Holt played in to some of the college reps I know. At least two will be at the next game.

"You feel good about the next game?"

"Yes sir."

"If you need more time off, I completely understand. Just let me know."

He doesn't respond right away, something that catches my attention and has my curiosity peaked.

"What's the matter Holt?"

He shakes his head, "Nothing sir."

I take the step or two back and sit down on the bleachers, a small attempt at making us seem even. "Have a seat kid."

He listens like always, sitting down far enough away I'd have to reach to touch him.

"Whats on your mind?"

He swallows hard, shaking his damp hair as the last few beads of sweat trickle off them and spray on the ground below.

"Take your time."

I remember what it felt like to tell people about my dad in the beginning. The fear and shame, the embarrassment, the anger. The anger came for me immediately, it was all I felt and I rebelled hard. Sometimes if I let it, that anger still wells up inside of me until I explode taking it out on everyone around me. I hope that Holt finds a better way to handle his anger.

"B-Birdie said you go to...." His uncertainty rings through his words.

"To therapy?" I fill in for him. "Yeah, sometimes." I study his profile, his eyes fixated on the floor that he's staring down at it. "There's no shame in seeking help Holt."

He nods his head but I'm not sure he's actually listening. So I wait. I wait for him to say something. I hope that he'll say something, open up slightly.

Rhett's already told me nothing has changed for him but that Holt finally told Kendra that he was raped. It's stupid but I hadn't expected it. Mostly because I don't know how someone could do that to someone. Let alone a kid. But it only proves there are some sick people in this world.

"How'd you know you could trust them?" He asks the question so quietly I almost miss it.

A sigh releases from deep within my chest, an ache in my heart opening up for the all this kid had to go through.

"You know Holt, I've found that most people are good." I tell him because it's true. I really think most people are good at heart, he just happened to get stuck with one of the few that aren't. "What made you trust Kendra?"

He stiffens and I realize they must not have told him that they filled me in. If he's mad I can't tell.

"Birdie said I could." He glances at me very briefly before returning to the floor. "And I'm tired."

A smile comes to my face at the mention of my beautiful, loving girl and the fact that she's got such a good heart.

"I can't tell you who to trust Holt, that's something you have to figure out on your own. But I can tell you talking to a professional helped me to accept that what my dad did when I was young had nothing to do with me and everything to do with him. It took a while, but I can tell you it doesn't haunt me anymore like it used to."

Holt flinches as noise erupts from the locker room door as the first few guys emerge.

"You're gonna be alright kid." I tell Holt. "You just need to give yourself some time."

I fight the urge to reach out for him, knowing it'll do nothing but backfire on me and instead I dismiss him to the showers so I can make sure I don't miss Drew.

As soon as he pushes through the door I shout his name, the sound echoing in the gym.

"Dinners on me tonight, lets go get your sister." I tell him as I put the last of the equipment away into the closet.

"She's spending the night at a friend's." He answers, walking toward me.

"Alright, how does some wings sound?" I lock the closet, pocketing the keys.

He gives me a smile, the same one he always does when I take him for dinner. I know he thinks I'm pitying him but I don't. I'm just trying to be present. But he nods his head and agrees anyway.

"Yeah, wings sound good."

                                ————————

I have to help my brother hang upper cabinets at my moms new place today. Which wouldn't be a big deal but my upper body is so sore because I've bee. A crazy person working out and last night we all tried to make human tables 🤣. I don't know how I'm going to hold a cabinet over my head. Wish me luck I'm gonna need it.