Safe

-44- Laughter

2 weeks later

Holt Lincoln

"Hey Holt! Wait up!"

I search the sea of bodies surrounding me, finding Ty. Dread fills me.

"Hey man what's up?" He holds his knuckles out for me to hit.

Drew initially was the only one to greet me like this. But as the weeks passed, the rest of the team has been holding their clenched fists out in my direction. I don't love it. But I raise my knuckles to his and tap them. I'm too focused on his greeting to answer.

"So have you talked to Birdie yet?" He asks. "About me?"

My heart starts to beat hard in my chest, not wanting to tell him I haven't. I don't want him to get mad.

Slowly I shake my head, "n-not yet".

"Oh. You still will yeah?"

I'm too busy trying to keep the basement from infiltrating my thoughts that I don't respond.

"Holt, man, you will right?" He presses.

He touches my shoulder and I leap away, wondering if anyone else smells the rank, stale odor that's too much like his cigar to be anything else.

I nod my head, avoiding eye contact with Ty as I look for him in the hallway.

Somehow I've managed to back myself against a wall, the cool cinder blocks not helping to ground me in the present as my mind warps my reality.

"Alright..." Ty says hesitantly. "Thanks man."

And then he leaves me there, panicking. I'm almost certain he's here, the scent of his cigar muted like he passed through in the background, keeping tabs on me and I suck in a breath at the thought.

I'm trying not to completely lose it but I can't help but curl into myself as a chill spreads through my body.

"Holt."

"I'm sorry." I bark, maybe he'll go easy on me if I just apologize right from the start.

"Hey dude, it's Drew."

Shaking my head, my body trembling. I don't believe him. It's a game.

"Did Ty do something?" He asks but I can't answer. "Holt man, open your eyes."

I swear I feel hands at my waist, pulling at my clothes and I jump away.

"Don't touch me!" My eyes fly open as I look around, landing on Drew his hands are open, alarm on his face.

"I'm not. I'm not."

I'm a mess.

Dropping to the floor, I focus on the patterned carpet in the hallway. My chest is heaving, my body trembling.

"Can I sit?" Drew asks. "Over here."

I don't need to look to know that the spot in which he wants to sit is plenty far from me. I nod my head.

Out of the corner of my eye, I watch him sit, his back against the same wall as mine. He doesn't say anything, smiling at someone as they pass us in the hall.

"You okay?" He finally asks.

I can't smell his cigar anymore and I have to assume it was all in my head.  The thought makes me angry. That he has so much control over me still.

"Yeah." I say quietly. "Sorry."

He shrugs. "No big deal."

The noise in the hallway is growing quiet as everyone filters off to their classroom.

"We're going to be late."

I hear Drew laugh through his nose. "Don't worry about it, we can get Mrs. Peterson to write us a late slip."

"Who's that?"

Looking over at Drew, the corner of us mouth pulled up into a mischievous smirk. "The office lady. She's cool. Give yourself a few."

He's probably right, my hands are quivering slightly, my heart still slamming around but the basement is no longer clouding my thoughts.

We sit in silence for a few more minutes, until my breathing has regulated and I've stopped shaking before Drew asks "What was that about? With Ty?"

I'm not sure if this is something I'm supposed to talk about or if Ty wants it to be a secret. I've never been in this situation before.

"He's being cool right?" I nod. "If he's not you let me know. I'll take care of it."

My eyes meet Drew's and there's no doubt that he will. I'm not sure if the idea comforts me or scares me.

"H-he wants me to talk to Birdie." I blurt.

"About what?"

Shrugging, I'm not entirely sure. "Him."

"He likes her?" But apparently Drew does.

I nod my head, I thought it was obvious.

Drew laughs. "Guess I can't blame him. Birdie's pretty awesome."

I have to agree too.

"Are you going to?" He asks.

I climb to my feet, Drew following.

"I don't know."

"Do you like her?"

We start toward the office, passing by all the closed doors of the classes now in session and I think about Drew's question.

I do like a Birdie.

But I also know right now, I can't. Dr. Aldrich and I even talked about it. Of course she was neutral, but I care about Birdie. Enough to realize that I'm too messed up to be with anyone. Or even try.

"I don't know." I tell Drew.

Turning the corner into the hallway the office is in, Drew stops and I stop with him.

"Listen man, if you like her make your move first. If you don't though, you need to let her know. I'm pretty good at spotting when girls are into guys and I'd bet my life she's into you." He says.

My heart starts to pound again but it's different, not accompanied by fear and looming panic. Instead I feel a smile start to force it's way on my face, something bubbling up inside me. I hang my head, not wanting Drew to see.

"Come on, I'll go sweet talk Mrs. P."

I see his knuckles appear in my line sight and I let the laugh that wants to burst out of me out through my nose. Knocking my knuckles to his, I look up at Drew, an easy smile on his face.

"Did you just almost laugh?" He asks.

My cheeks flare. "Don't get used to it."

My response makes Drew laugh, loud and obnoxious in the empty hallway.

"Who are you?"

He swings his arm across my shoulder and I let him pull me into step beside him.

                              ————————

Tah-dah! I did it. Now hopefully I can keep going.

Also I love Drew.

Also also, I'm loathing the Wattpad update. Like no, don't tell me what I want to read at the bottom of my screen. You don't know me Wattpad. You don't know my reading habits. Maybe I'm not ready to finish reading the story you're suggesting because I'm not ready for it to be done. STOP PRESSURING ME!