I Missed You (Bucky x Reader)

~Chapter 45~

hellooo, i posted the first part for my Carter Baizen (Gossip Girl) fanfic, for those who were interested. anyway, enjoy the new chapter❤️

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"It looks like everything is perfectly fine." Shuri says as she approaches her computer to type something before looking up at Bucky. "Have you been having any nightmares lately?"

"Uh... not since three weeks ago." Bucky responds.

"That's around the time y/n came to Wakanda." Shuri smiles softly. "I must say, ever since she arrived, I have noticed a huge improvement in both your physical and mental health."

"Yeah, I guess she just has that effect on me." Bucky smiles dreamily at the thought of you as he looks away for a moment.

"I'm very happy for you two." Shuri says after turning off her computer. "Although you never really talked about her. Every time I brought her up in one of our sessions you'd change the topic quickly. You sure you don't wanna let some feelings out? Especially since it's your last day here." Shuri says, approaching Bucky and sitting on a chair in front of Bucky.

Bucky sighs, thinking for a moment, before looking at Shuri again. "When I was very young I used to think that love was just something idiots thought they felt, but this woman has a hold on my heart that I could not break if I wanted to. It has been... overwhelming, and humbling, and even painful at times. But I could not stop loving her any more than I could stop breathing. I am hopelessly, irretrievably in love with her. More than she knows." Bucky says, the words coming out of his mouth before he could think them through. He blinks a few times before looking down slightly embarrassed. "I'm sorry, I guess I just haven't had the chance to talk to anyone about this. But... it feels good to do so." Bucky says, surprising himself.

"It's okay to talk about your feelings. And I hope that you keep doing that in New York. How do you feel about going back home?" Shuri asks.

"Scared, nervous... but mostly in peace." Bucky says. "I think I'm ready for this."

"That's good." Shuri smiles. "Although I hope you still come visit us soon."

"That's definitely my plan." Bucky smiles back. "I should go back to my room though, we still haven't packed our bags."

"Oh, then you should definitely go." Shuri chuckles. "I'll see you and y/n later."

Bucky makes his way through the enormous palace until he finally gets to the familiar hallway. Once he reaches his door, he knocks softly to let you know he's coming in before slowly opening the door. He looks inside and finds you curled up on the couch beside the window, looking out into the city. Bucky finally steps fully inside the room before closing the door behind him.

"Hey." he says softly. When he gets no response from you, not even a smile in his direction, he frowns in confusion. His eyes instinctively dart towards the bed to find his little notebook on it. He keeps trying to figure out what it is that happened, something related to his notebook. And then it clicks. The realization makes his blood run cold, completely clueless on how to approach the situation. Bucky just stands there, frozen in place, looking at your curled up body. Even though you hadn't so much as moved or looked at him since he walked in the room, you knew he was there, and by now you knew he figured it out.

"So, when were you gonna tell me?" you deadpan, not looking at him yet.

"Y/n, I can explain-"

"There's no need, really, I think that entry was pretty self-explanatory." you say before finally looking at him. The look in your eyes makes Bucky gulp. He never saw you like this before. He was expecting you to be angry, but your eyes held no emotion whatsoever. Bucky suddenly feels frightened, and what he says next escapes his lips before he can process it.