Hostess || BTS X Reader ✔️

Chapter 23: Hug Me

February 15, 2019
6:00 p.m

"Ketamine..." (Y/N) whispers, her eyes looking dull and lifeless as she goes through the drugs that was laid in front of her.

Slowly and reluctantly, the female moves her heavy hands, rubbing her eyes. She blinks, close her eyes, and blinked again. She sit up, drag her feet off the bed, and rubbed her knuckles onto her eyes again as the world around her blurred. She tugs her arm, feeling a sharp sensation around her cubicle point. Wires were connected to her body as needles sank to her veins, giving her the nutrients she's been missing for the past couple of days.

Drugged.

She was told that she was drugged.

"It's a dissociative general anesthetic, it could be used in medical settings, but it's used predominantly to anesthetize animals for surgery. This one is fast, could drug someone in under 30 minutes... it causes dizziness, dissociation, disorientation, and the list could go on. This is used to sedate and incapacitate people for only one reason: sexually assault them. But if you put too much, one could die," (Y/N) looked at its two forms, liquid and powder, both can be mixed into drinks that either her or one of the girls in the hostess could take.

Then she looked at another. "Ecstasy."

"This... this drug gives empathy for others, making the one who uses this have peace with themselves and the world. It sounds good, but it isn't. It causes enhanced sensation, confusion, depression, anxiety, sleeplessness, craving for the drug, and paranoia," then it hit (Y/N). Her sleeplessness, those countless days where she couldn't shut her eyes even once, the sudden sensation of wanting someone inside of her, the sexual needs that has been swimming around her head... and those cravings, those terrible yet amazing cravings.

It's all hitting her.

"These are the drugs that we've classified that's in your blood system, but there are more we
can't distinguish, Ms. (L/N)," the doctor informs the girl, his eyes staring at her with fascination. "I'm surprised that you can distinguish these drugs, not many can."

(Y/N) took a deep breath, uninterested at the doctor's attempt to create small talk.

The doctor clears his throat. "Anyways, you'll have to stay here for a couple of days we we'll try to clean your system and help you deal with your extreme withdrawal... Ms. (L/N), are you sure you don't know who drugged you?"

"I'm certain," she impassively stated.

"You're a smart girl, we all know that—"

"Doctor, may you please leave? I'm feeling tired."

"Of course, of course. Have a good rest."

She nodded and watches the doctor leave her room. This feeling inside of her... it's like a void, an empty dark void with an endless black oasis that consumes everything, so you're left feeling nothing. She felt empty. She wanted to cry, to scream, yet nothing came... her eyes were... blank.

(Y/N) stayed quiet, hand clutching the bedsheets tightly while looking around the room; a curved flatscreen tv sits in front of her bed, in the corner were four chairs circling a table, and as (Y/N) looked at the window that separated her from the outside world, she saw her reflection.

Soft wisps of her (h/c) hair past her ear, caressing the skin of her neck, jaw, and cheeks and around her rich, (e/c) eyes. She was alive, but she wasn't. Suffering, loneliness, longing, desire; her eyes held all those deep seated emotions and many more. For decades, after (Y/N) had learned who she really was, what she was capable of, how easy for her to figure out her emotions and to control them... but... after all of this, after the things she's gone through, she finally looked at herself again... and for the first time, she could not tell what emotions were soaring just beyond her walls.