𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬

69

I have been forced to wake up early this morning for more training, and after what happened yesterday I'm not looking forward to it.

I strip out of my clothes and sit in the icy water, wait.. they got a new tub ahahah-... oops.

Okay forget control were going to focus on holding the damn fire. I had an idea so I was going to try that. I faintly hear more Bakugo screams but that's besides the point. I let my flames heat everything in my body, like completely. I'm sweating in this ice water and it making me uncomfortable. Then with one good push I focus on keeping them alive, and it worked... kind of. The blue flames danced along the ground all around me but they seemed to just hang there but they slowly sizzled down.
I huff but try again.

Heat.... come on.. a little more. Push. Fire! Alive... alive.. alive! Alive-... dead. I angrily huff but continue.
Maybe focus on one area.
I heat my hand up completely but I stop when my skin starts stinging.. what the hell?! I stare into my palm it was red and irritated. Okay so, don't heat one spot too much, nice to know. But I did it anyway and heated my hand up, it hurt but when I pushed the blue flames danced beautiful in the air, swirling round and round. I was captivated, they looked so pretty. I then close my palm and everything disappeared.... oh my gosh. I DID IT!!
"YESSAHAHHHHHH"
I screech and throw my hands in the air, cold water flying all over the ground. I DID IT!

I then focused on both hands.
Heat.. ouch but not as bad... heat...... come on.... they were stinging painfully. Heat...... now!
It seemed to be a really living person, it was happily dancing around my hands. Weaving through my fingers and twirling around in the air. I just kinda... stared at it. It was like a vast ocean, full of deep and dark secrets. Yet it was beautiful. It was like-.... me.

I'm beautiful right?
I hold too many secrets. To many to count. But am I full of life like my flames. They say quirks are apart of a person, they are you.... so am I-... am I beautiful? Am I a person full of life? Yes. I am. But sometimes I dont feel like it.... is this what Shoto feels? Does he feel lifeless. Like a robot. And if so, have I noticed it before? Or have I gone and made things even more difficult for him. Am I-.. no I'm just making more problems and unanswered questions for myself. Stop. You need to Training, you don't need to think about this right now.

I go ahead a heat up both one leg and an arm before pushing, flames erupt out of my arm and leg, but the legs fire was weaker and uncontrolled. It was a wild flame, rapidly moving. But it was sparse and weak, and it wouldn't build up. Just constantly tearing its self down before eventually dying out.

Is that flame me? Do I need to more control, more strength? Am I reckless thinking I can do something when I'm reality I can't, and it just causes a chain reaction of myself tearing all my confidence down and eventually die. Will I... die? No. mentally. Ill mentally sizzle out and die like my flames. All because I'm stuck in some cold unfamiliar waters, but it's been like that my whole life. Or has it? Have I only recently taken a plunge into that icy water, pushed myself so far I've fallen off the edge. Into the darkness-

"Y/n!"
Someone calls, I snap out of my little daze only to realise I've held my flames for longer than I thought. But the leg flames had-... they had died. They died a long time ago. All while I was focused on the flames away from the cold water. Is that real life?
I focused too much on something else other than that little flame inside me, and it-... has my own flame already gone out? Have I lost my flame?

I sat back in my seat and push the plate bowl thing away from me, food still sitting there. But my appetite had disappeared. Too much weighed heavily on my mind. I look around the table to see my class mates happily eating, chatting away without a care in the world.

they aren't like you y/n.
What-

They don't have problems, like you do.
Who are you?!

Me?.. oh darling. I'm you.
What the hell? What is this? Why can I hear that voice?

Can't wait to chat again, bye bye for now darling~
What the-

"Hey y/n are you coming to the test of Of courage?"
Mina happily speaks up, but Mr Aizawa cuts in and drags her and some others away. I shrug and get up approaching my class.

"Oh look we have another kitty~ the pairs have already been selected so pleas pick a pair you want to go with!"
A pussy cat speaks up, I nonchalantly shrug and point at Bakugou. He just stares at me before nodding.
I make my way over before tensing. Todoroki stood next to him, a blank look on his face.

Oh fuck this is not going to go well.

"Can you shut the hell up!"
Bakugo shouts at Todoroki while I just smirk smugly at him.

"Ahah fuck y-"

"You shut the hell up too."
I pout while looking in Todorokis direction, he just smirks back mockingly. I scoff and ignore the heat rising to my face.

What the ACTUAL FU-
Why am I blushing?! Oh no! Oh f-

"Ou shut up! I can hear you mumbling, anyway you both need to listen. Someone could be stalking us."
I freeze momentarily before carrying on. This isn't scary at all. And thankfully the heat and subsided.

But the real question is why the hell am I so childish towards Todoroki? We should be acting like adults... not children.

"Wait-.. hey?... do you guys-"

"Shhhh!"
Toronto growls but I snap back.

"No do you guys smell the smoke?!"
I breath in deeply before looking up, large pillars of black cloud rise up into the sky.

"We have to get out of here!!"
I call grabbing both boys arms and start running back, they pull away shouting at me.

"What are you sca-"

"This isn't time to fool around Katsuki!"
I angrily speak, he tenses as I use his first name. I growl before snatching both boys up again and start sprinting through the forest.

"We-"

"We need to get to the main area!"
Todoroki calls over our loud ass running noises.

I nod before carrying on. It's time to push aside my silly little problems, it's time get serious.

"The villains... they're after y/n and 'kacchan'"
One of the pussy cats speak in everyone's heads, I just freeze before looking dead in Bakugous eyes.... were being.. targeted?

VILLAIN ATTACK

"Don't slow down now?! Keep go!"
Todoroki speaks up, snatching my arms and pulling me along. I quickly follow after him as Bakugo speed ahead.

"Katsuki wai-"