Axl's POV
Every day it gets more and more diffcult to keep up appearances.
I know that instead of wedging myself into the corners of each dressing room to keep as far as possible from all the debauchery every single night, I should be on the phone with Chas. Or better yet, I should be at home, with her. Not here, currently avoiding all the barely dressed women running circles around my bandmates.
"C'mon Axl!" Slash waves frantically. "Come hang out!"
His words make my stomach lurch, like I've had too much to drink. But alcohol never makes me feel sick anymore. The thought of other women does.
"I'm cool," I tell him. "It's about time I turn in. Gotta rest up, or else my voice can't take it. You know how I am."
Tonight's one of the lucky few we get to stay up in a hotel. Nothing too special, but it's a hell of a lot better than the bus. Izzy's supposed to be rooming with me, but that's only if he even makes it up the room. Probably not, with all that he's most likely getting into right now.
Duff's drug-induced wide eyes almost scare me as he walks through the doorway and comes to stand between Slash and I in the middle of the room, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a normal sight now at days.
"There you are, Ax."
"Here I am."
Duff heads right for the catering table, shaky hands fixing himself a drink. "Come have fun with us. Ian's got all these girls, but of course there's the drugs, too -"
"I know," I stop him, unable to handle the eagerness in his voice. "I'm tired, man. The kids were so loud tonight, and you know how fuckin' shitty security was. My throat feels like it's on fire. I'm gonna head out."
Even through his hair, I see Slash eye me suspiciously. Duff's stare is enpty, his face is blank. Whatever cocktail he's on. . .
"Dude," Slash says, dumbfounded. "You haven't hung out once after a show."
"Not true," I counter. "I hang out all the time." I just dip out once you guys start with all your shit.
"No, you don't," Duff disagrees before lifting the red plastic cup in his hands. He takes a long drink, and I use that time to really get my lie down solid. "You never stick around for the real fun. You haven't done coke with me in forever-"
"It's not good for my voice," I say simply. It's not good for my relationship. Not for me, or for Chas. I don't need to fill myself up with vices anymore.
Duff rolls his eyes. "Yeah. Okay."
Just as I'm about to remind them that they're wasting precious time that could be spent with all the groupies in The Cult's dressing room by standing here interrogating me, Duff hits me with a curveball.
"God, it's like you're. . . In love, or some shit. You're so fuckin' boring lately. You've hardly punched any walls, and it's been weeks! You're going soft. What, do you have some girl you're holding out for? I give it a week before you're not just flirting with girls, but fucking them, too! Get the stick out of your ass, Axl. Go talk to them. Get drunk. Get high. I'm tired of you bein' on the fuckin' sidelines, all alienated and shit."
