Cyrus v. the Homosapien Agenda

1/18/22

A.N. Hopefully I publish it in time, but it is my birthday today! (May 15). Keeping up the tradition from Swingsets to publish the day of my birthday!

It's definitely past the day, I was extremely busy today. BUT I did write this chapter on my birthday. It's not super long, but it does have a major moment.

Andi, Buffy, Jonah, and I did something a bit reckless this weekend. They were trying to help me get my mind off TJ and his cousin, which worked. But we were still responsible enough, though we did go to Midwest City longer than we expected and my phone died. I got grounded for a week bar performances, which isn't too bad.

It was MLK Weekend, so we got back to school on Tuesday. When I get there, Buffy's waiting at the locker (early basketball practice), "Where have you been? I've been texting you all weekend."

"Parents grounded me for the week after we stayed in Midwest City for too long. I should've brought my charger with me."

"I don't think you can be blamed. It was a crazy day."

"Yeah but my parents don't know about the whole thing that happened on Friday. It's fine. I can still perform and everything. It's just like no electronics after 10 other than the weekend and no after school activities other than the musical, and Andi's party" I shrug.

Lunch is actually amazing, because Natalie, AJ, DJ, and TJ both had birthdays over the long weekend, and AJ isn't there. DJ's a super sweet person and I would take over her pesty twin counterpart any day. Plus, Buffy's very strict about the sheet cake rule, so everyone gets their own Publix giant chocolate sheet cakes. 

We all sing for them but I avoid TJ. He seems apologetic but I don't want to push it. It's then I notice that Jonah, who's usually the most vocal in such adventures, is conspicuously absent.

I wish I could text, so I settle for leaning over to Kaitlin, "Hey, have you seen Jonah?"

"He's here," says Kaitlin, not meeting my eyes.

"At school?" I ask and she shrugs.

I don't see him for the rest of the day, even after rehearsal, but his car's here. I wonder if he was caught up in music work or something. Maybe there's missed texts from him. Or not. Who knows.

Finally on Thursday afternoon I see him step out of the bathroom in the atrium. I rush over, my hand outstretched to give him our patented bro-handshake, but he stiffens, "Jonah! Where have you been?"

He doesn't answer, but I push on, "Is everything okay?"

"You tell me," he says, "We've known each other since we were six but Andi's the first one you tell?"

There's this beat of silence. He sighs and turns to the exit of the school. I follow him, thankful no one else was around.

"I don't know what you want me to say. In that moment it was Andi I needed. She is literally the reason that I didn't get outed," I answer when we're outside.

"I thought you could trust me. I trusted you with so many of my secrets. I was fine with finding out with everyone else on New Years because I figured you felt safer that way but Buffy accidentally texted me instead of Andi this weekend about some pact they made and how glad she was you felt brave enough to tell Andi first."

I sigh, "Do you really want to know why I told her first?"

"Yeah, obviously!"

"Fine. I was 13 when I first realized. It was the day you double dated with Amber, Iris, and I to the carnival."

"Wait..."

"You put it together yet? It was you. You were the one I had a crush on that made me realize I was gay. I didn't know I was even allowed to until I had a conversation with Bram who explained his own coming out story. It took a while for me to get over you but you were my gay awakening. So you can imagine why I wouldn't have you as the first."

He just gapes at me. I sigh, ready to head back in to go to rehearsals. He grabs my elbow, "Wait."

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I don't remember that time a lot but I know that if you couldn't trust me then I couldn't have been a good friend then."

"It doesn't bother you that I liked you?"

"Knowing how stupid I had been back then, I probably would have been then. Now though i'm honored you could tell me."

"Me too."

We talk a bit longer but what's important has been said. He's still my best friend and that's what matters in the end.

I do see someone I don't wish to. TJ. He's just got out of practice when rehearsal is over and he seems to be waiting for me.

"Cyrus," he starts.

"What?" I give in.

"I'm sorry."

"You finally learned how to say that. But why?"

"I've been a shitty best friend since I got outed. You were there for me and I took it for granted."

"What led you to that realization? Someone telling you off? Your cousin?"

"A friend."

I snort, "Okay then. Tell your friend thanks but no thanks."

"Well I'm not really talking to the guy anymore, but," he says, scratching the back of his neck.

"Well here's some more advice. A simple 'I'm sorry' won't fix a damn thing," I say, walking away.