He's The Subject I Can't Have [ON-GOING]

Chapter Two (Kisses)

Mabilis na napatingin sa akin sila Kisses, Christine at Lorraine at may pagtatanong sa kanilang mga mata. Lumingon-lingon muna ako, sinisigurong walang taong papalapit na posibleng makarinig sa amin.

"I - uh, I have a crush on Alexis, right? Since October pa? What if siya nalang ang susulatan ko? Instead of pouring that Jerome guy my attention and efforts, bakit hindi nalang kay Alexis?"

Kisses look at me unknowingly, while she's playing with her fingers. I know what she is thinking. She's afraid na malaman at mapagalitan siya ng Ate niya sa gagawin namin. "We are not telling Ate Leslie." I told her. Making sure she'll be going to relax dahil parang anytime, mababawian na siya ng hininga eh.

I saw Lorraine smiled a little and nodded her head, "I'm in. You know naman na crush ko rin iyang si Alexis simula nang nakita ko siyang sumayaw eh." she giggled and made a playful smirk.

I throw her my glare but she just raised her brows while looking at me. "Akin siya, Lorraine." Pagak kong tugon sa kaniya. She just shrugged her shoulders and beamed. "Kilala ka ba niya?" she fired back, leaving me speechless.

Damn. That was below the belt.

"Gaya-gaya ka lang ng crush eh. Bakit 'di mo nalang balikan iyong ex mong kapit-bahay niyo?" I barked at her then I immediately laugh after seeing her faking a cough as if nabulunan siya - where in fact, wala naman siyang kinakain.

"Eksiherada 'to." I murmured at tinalikuran siya habang pinipikon siya nila Kisses at Christine.

I averted my gaze at the sea from a far. We're on the third floor at may dagat kasi sa harapan ng school namin. Ginawang beach resort at may iilan ding barko na pagmamay-ari ng mga malalaking kompanya dito sa lugar namin.

I watch the serenity of the ocean and I can't help but to think deeply. I recalled Lorraine's words earlier - the part where she said na may gusto siya kay Alexis - I cannot really blame her kung may gusto man siya, he's a great guy naman kasi.

I still can remember that day when we saw Alexis, dancing. It was almost five thirty in the afternoon, Friday of October Nineteenth. The sky was shaded with an orange-yellow pero marami pa ring mga estudyante sa campus. We were practicing for a competition na kalahok lahat ang mga grade eleven. I never expected na sa hapon na 'yon, doon ko lang ma-aappreciate si Alexis. I mean, I already saw him since junior days but he really never caught my attention. However, things gone upside down when I saw him on his orange shirt while dancing. It really pissed me off seeing a person wearing an orange shirt because I never love the color, but he became an exception. I don't know, while he was dancing, everything becomes blur and he's the only person I saw. Cliché, but it's the truth. I just want to slap my face that time for being a senseless human being for appreciating someone whom I didn't know personally.

I smiled a little, remembering that day feels surreal. After that day kasi, I am already watching him from a far without the knowledge of these three. Nalaman lang nila na crush ko si Alexis before kami nagkaroon ng year end party.

I am not really the kind of person na madali lang magkagusto. 'Yung gusto talaga, huh. Iba kasi ang nagagwapohan lang, ang nagkagusto talaga at nagmahal. There is a vast difference between those three. That's why sometimes, I tend to contemplate on how do others fell in love. Some will say they love someone but they're just into looks pala. Ironically, people are just in love with the thought of falling in love.

Love.

Love is really one of my greatest perhaps while wandering in this world. I haven't experience falling in love nor experiencing heartbreaks. I didn't even at least tried for I am not still ripe enough to engage in a complicated commitment. Kung baga sa prutas, hilaw pa. Kasi kapag iyan, kinuha mo, kahit alam mo naman na hindi pa pweding kainin, magdudulot lamang ito sa iyo ng pait.