AJR-Panic Attacks

Jack- 9 (The Library)

RYANS POV

"Come on Jack we gotta go! We're gonna be late!" I scream through the apartment. Me and Jack both have class today, and it ‪starts at 9‬. We're gonna be late if we don't go now.
"Ok ok I'm coming!" Jack says back to me. We eventually get all our stuff together and head to class. Me and Jack have one class together now, and one class after lunch together, along with Alba, who happened to be in the same afternoon class as us. We sit through the three-hour lesson, then get let out for lunch. We told our girlfriends to meet us in the cafeteria. We get our food and sit down at our normal table in the corner. We want to have as little social interaction with the rest of the school as possible. I wish we could go home for lunch, but our next classes ‪start at 1‬, and our room is all the way across campus, plus eating at the cafeteria means we don't have to cook. I guess it wouldn't take us that long to go to our room and back again, but it's that 20 minutes of effort I'm not willing to put in after sitting through a three-hour lesson. We finish our food with a little room to spare, so we decided to head to the library. Alba and Cat wanted to get to class, so we said goodbye in the cafeteria. Me and Jack head to the library. The library was pretty cool. It had all these little quiet study rooms that were rarely used, and they were great for just hanging out in. Well, until the librarian yells at you for being too loud. Such a reversed system that is... Anyway, we separated when we got inside, I went to my favourite section, the history of music section, and I think Jack went to the comic book section. I already read all the books that were in there, but hey, good to look at them again, right? A few minutes later, I pull out my phone to make sure we get to our next class on time. It's ‪12:49‬, so we should probably get going now. I go to wrangle Jack, but I couldn't find him. That's odd, where is he? I go searching up and down the rows of books, when I see one of the study room doors cracked open, but with no lights on. That's strange. I walk closer and hear the sound of someone hyperventilating. Jack? I crack the door open a little more, and from the light I let into the room, I see Jack with his back against the wall, his knees up in his chest. His head was buried in his arms, folded across his knees.
"Jack, what's wrong?" I ask, crouching in front of him.
"I think I'm having a.. a panic attack." Jack says looking up at me. His eyes were welled with tears, and he was shaking a lot.
"It's ok Jack."
"I'm not breathing v-very well!" Jack cries, burying his face again. I take off my backpack and sit in front of him. I rest my hand on the sides of his knees.
"Jack, this will end. You'll be ok, I promise. I'm right here, and I'm not leaving. Let's get your breathing back, alright?" I ask.
"I feel like I'm gonna pass out or die." Jack mumbles.
"Jack..." My heart broke. I scoot over to beside him, wrapping my arm around him. Jack fell into my shoulder and started crying.
"You're ok Jack, I've got you." I say again, trying to create some form of comfort for him. Jack grabbed onto my shirt and let his emotions surface. I gently start rubbing his back in circles, allowing that to relax him.
"I'm so sorry." Jack croaks out through the tears.
"Don't be sorry! It's ok to let emotions be emotions. Let's just get your breathing back." I say. I know he's gonna need some time to calm himself down, so I started singing Karma. I have no idea why I picked that song, but it's working. In the few moments I started singing, I could tell Jack was trying to get his breathing back. I felt his grip on my shirt start to loosen, but he didn't let it go. Once I finished the song, I could feel his breathing was almost back to normal. I feel his heart rate getting slower, as it slowed down to match mine. I wouldn't let him go as I continue to calm him down. After a minute, I let him pull away, keeping one of my hands on his back. With my other hand, I wipe the tears off his face, making sure he's ok. I can only see a part of his face, illuminated by the light from the window in the door. He continues staring at the ground, gaining the courage to look up at me after what just happened. When he finally looks up at me, he looks so embarrassed, but also thankful.
"Thanks." He says quietly.
"Anytime Jack. I'm glad I could help." I respond.
"Can we go home?" He asks quietly.
"Of course!" I say. I stand up, reaching my hands out for Jack to grab. "Now, let's get you home. We can set up a fort in the living room, call Adam to join us, wait for Alba to get out of class, she can come over and we can have dinner and decompress a little. How does that sound?" I ask. He smiles and nods. I know these are exhausting, plus there's no way either of us are going to class. He couldn't sit through it and focus, and I wouldn't be able to either, so there's no point in going. I wrap my arm around his back and we walk out of the study room. He stared at the ground the entire way back, trusting me to walk for him. We get back to the apartment and I get busy throwing blankets together to build a fort in front of the couch. I make Jack sit in it as I grab some snacks and my computer and phone. I pick up my phone to see a few texts from Alba.
"Hey, Jack's not answering, are you two heading to class?" Was the first one.
"Where did you guys go?" She asks in a group chat with me and Jack. And,
"Hope you guys are ok? Class is starting now and you're not here, I'm assuming you two are getting into trouble somehow. I'll get you the notes from today, see you later." I text back as I walk back into my room.
"Sorry to break your hopes of us getting into trouble, Jack was having a panic attack, so we came home. Thanks for getting the notes, see you soon." I turn off my phone and crawl into the fort.
"Who was that?" Jack asks, as I set up my computer, pulling up Netflix.
"Alba. You should answer her texts, she got worried about you."
"Ok, I'll go get my phone." Jack says, motioning to stand up.
"No, sit down, I've got it." I say, handing Jack his phone.
"So, what do you want to watch?" I ask.
"Doesn't matter." He replies. I get a notification on my phone from Alba.
"Oh no! Is he ok? Also, come up with a better story than that next time someone asks you what happened. See you in a bit." I smirk at her comment. Jack smirks along with me as he reads the same text. I pull up The Office as Jack is texting Alba back. Once he's done texting, I look at the notification on my phone as to what he sent.
"I'll make sure to add some pidgeons and dragons to the story next time." I laugh at the message and throw my phone beside me. We lean back on the couch and watch the computer.
"So, wanna talk about what happened today?" I ask. Jack sighs.
"I guess."
"You don't have to if you don't want to, but it's always good to talk about your problems out loud." Jack nods, then takes a second. He explains it and we go back to watching the computer. I grab my phone to text Adam, explain what happened today, and ask if he wanted to come over. 10 minutes later, we hear a knock at the door. I run to go open the door, and Alba, Cat and Adam are all there. I welcome them in and tell Alba that Jack is in the fort. She runs into the fort and Cat gives me a hug.
"How are you doing?" She asks.
"I'm ok." I respond.
"Thanks for calming him down." Adam says.
"Oh of course." I respond. "We were watching the office in the fort, wanna join us?" I ask.
"Is the fort big enough for all of us?" Adam questions.
"I'll make it bigger." I say, running to grab more blankets. I enlarge the fort, us all crawling in. Alba sat next to Jack on one side, me and Cat on the other side, and Adam sat in the middle. We watched a few episodes until Adam fell asleep, letting Jack and Alba crawl out of the fort, into Jacks room, leaving me and Cat to wonder what to do. Cat pulls me out of the fort, me quietly questioning,
"Where are we going?" She pulls a blanket from the fort and pulls me out the window onto the fire escape, leading us up to the roof. She puts the blanket down and we sit down, snuggling into each other, and wrapping our arms around each other.
"How are you doing?" She asks.
"Pretty ok. I think Jack feels better now." I respond.
"That's not what I asked you." She says. I'm confused. "I asked how you were doing, not Jack." She says again.
"Oh.." I respond. "Umm. I guess I'm fine?" I don't really know what she wants me to say.
"Are you ok after calming Jack down?" Cat rephrases.
"Oh, uhhh... yeah." I reply.
"You sound hesitant Ry, what's up?" She asks.
"Nothing." I respond.
"Liar. What's wrong?" She asks again. I can't hide my problems from her.
"It's just-" I pause, trying to find the right words. "I missed another class and I was already super behind, but we weren't gonna go back to class cause neither of us were gonna focus. I guess I'm just stressed I'm gonna fail." I say, my voice getting quieter and quieter.
"You won't fail Ry. I know you won't. It'll all be ok, I promise." She says, giving me a hug.
"Thanks." I respond. "I love you." I add.
"I love you too." She says smiling.