Chapter Ten

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Was I an absolute idiot and possibly an asshole? Yes

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Was I an absolute idiot and possibly an asshole? Yes. Did pretty much ruining my relationship with Lydia effectively free me to focus on my future football career and protect me and my heart from future pain and possible betrayal? Also yes.

It wasn't like I wasn't completely and irrevocably enamored with her, that was just the problem.

I had been willing to stand up in front of her ex and proclaim that we were together, and I was so close to taking her in my arms and kissing her the way I'd dreamt about since the night I held her in my arms.

She was so close, her scent so beautifully intoxicating and reminiscent of the type of perfume Marnie used to wear- a fact that sent me hurtling back down to reality.

All the anguish that came with that relationship as well as the consequences for my football career slammed into my body right before I opened my mouth and allowed garbage to spill out of it, forcing Lydia to view me as a pig that I knew I wasn't.

It was for the best, though. She had just broken off an engagement with a toxic partner who had cheated on her with her best friend, and betrayals like that took a long time to heal from.

I couldn't let anyone or anything in the way of my future in the NFL, especially not Lydia.

I'd get her out of my system just by flirting shamelessly with her to prove my dickhead status to her and shut off any hopes on her part for a relationship, if there even were any feelings for me on her part.

It was so hard to read her, and that just added to the appeal and magnetic pull drawing me towards her.

I couldn't let myself get distracted with her, because she was the kind of girl I would give up everything for just to make her happy, and I'd been like that before once and look how that turned out for me.

"Hey man, you okay? You've been zoned out our whole conversation."

I turned my attention to Reed who had been brewing coffee for everyone.

"Yeah, I've just got a lot on my mind lately."

As if on cue, she strolled out of the bathroom in shorts that exposed her long shapely tanned legs with her hair wrapped up in a towel on the top of her head.

It was probably the sexiest I'd ever seen her, no makeup on her face and her natural beauty shining through.

A pair of fingers snapped in front of my face and I blinked back in surprise, realizing Reed had caught me staring at Lydia with my tongue practically hanging out of my mouth.

Thankfully she didn't join us for breakfast and disappeared into her room without so much as a glance in our direction.

"Damn, are you serious right now?"

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