She's The CEO

22. Target The Gala

Whenever my over the top, excruciatingly tiring and so called elite life becomes unbearable, I always try to normalize my mindset by walking across the aisles of the nearest Target store.

All my life, I have craved for attaining the unattainable 'perfect' in my life. Always trying to be the perfect daughter to my mother. The perfect person for being the heiress to my father's business. 

And the more I try to attain this perfection, the farther I slide away from the 'normal'. I know where I am standing today in my life, it is almost idiotic to ask for this certain 'normal'. But that definitely does not mean that I can't crave it.

I had left my dress jacket in the car and had given my driver a day off as well. I just needed time to myself. 

Dragging the shopping cart in front of me, I keep the most unhealthy food I can possibly find in it. And even though, I know I might never be able to eat twenty bags of flaming hot Cheetos, filling them in the cart just gives me a sense of fulfillment. 

I am not tired of working like a machine. I love doing my job. What I am tired of is having no control over my life. 

My mom arranges dates for me to go to gala, she decides which boy is appropriate to be my boyfriend, she has to know what I eat, I am simply tired of everything being controlled in my life just because to maintain this absolute lie of being a 'Perfect Winston'.

But I'm not. I'm simply not!

I am tired to keep up with this now. All I want is to scream and break free from this fake facade. 

And then there is Christos Hatzis.

Oh, Chris, I think and let loose a couple of tears from my eyes before putting two big bottles of soda in my cart.

"You need a handkerchief? Um...you're nose is running?", I hear the same velvety exotic voice.

"WHY?", I turn around and cry.

Chris' eyes turn away from me and I feel him crack. This make me shed a couple of tears more. I never understand the effect Chris has on me. And maybe this is the reason why he is the only one who has seen be in such vulnerable times.

Chris turns his eyes at me. I know by now I probably has my eyes resembling a panda due to the flowing mascara and eye liner so I just look down.

What surprise me is in this extreme scratched up moment I feel a golden warmth swarming up inside me. There was a certain sense of relief covering me up like a warm fuzzy blanket.

It's Christos' hug.

For once I put a stop to my rushing brain and go past the several hurdles that I had put up and throw my arms around him. 

I have never felt this safe and cared for ever in my entire life. I let loose myself and cry more. This felt like a moment where no one is there to judge me but only care for me.

"It's okay.", I feel his lips beside my ear and his hands softly stroking my hair.

"Why do you keep breaking me Chris?", I ask him as I look into his eyes.

He holds my face in his hands. I feel lost in his sapphire blue orbs. His eyes had always been a reflection of him because of the vibrant color. Lately, the playful glint has completely gone and his blue orbs have acquired a certain gloomy depth.

"I try not to. I made a mistake, Bianca. I keep asking for forgiveness and a chance to trust me.", Chris says holding my hands.

"How can I Chris? You tell me how can I? Do you even remember what you said about me?", I ask him.